What to do about my life?

[Jaydedgirl]

I am 24 ,i turn 25 in August, i work as a receptionist,dont have my own car, live with my parents. My parents just recently bought themselves a car, we have 4 cars but not one is mine. They think I might smash the car or something. I have my drivers permit but havent driven anywhere myself coz they wont let me. Its not like i met in an accident or something.. my sister who is younger than me drives and so does my brother so im left with no car. I feel depressed about everything, i want to cry but thats not gonna help me. I dont even have a job that pays well..I have gained weight eating and eating. I feel unattractive and my life just seems a blur. Its like i have no control over it..things just happen. I saved my money to buy myself a cellphone after many failed attempts of asking my parents to buy me one...and after i bought my own cellphone,my parents go and buy my brother and sister blackberries.....that really made me feel worthless. Like just to spite me ,my dad bought them cellphones and he pays for their phone bills,no questions asked. I hate living with my parents but i have no choice since i have no money to get my own place let alone a car. Other people my age have everything and I am grateful for what i have but i feel like im stuck in one position and im drowning ...i dont have friends who will help me or family that cares. I need guidance and love and somebody to tell me that everything will be ok and will work out. I lack self confidence in myself and my mum says my arms are getting fat and she will have that smile on her face as if to make it known that she wants me to get fat and feel ugly. I hate that and I hate my stomach for getting hungry all the time.. I feel sad and depressed..alone and confused......

[dramallama]

I think if you get into a pattern of comparing yourself to others, it can make you feel a lot worse. People in this world don't even have fresh water to drink, and you are concerned that you don't have a blackberry phone? But I can understand that you "only" having a cellphone is representative of your status. I don't have a car either - and I think it's great. I just get a family member to take me where I need to go, or I borrow their car or I take public transport. At least you have a job. I know in the US people are taking any job that they can get.

 

Try to look at each "problem" and say "Is it really that bad?" and "It's not working for me, so how can I change it?" Like with the eating, at least you have access to the Internet so you can research yourself what are the best foods. Watch Dr. Oz - he is just so knowledgable about nutrition. The mediterrian diet is very healthy and will keep you feeling full for longer. Try to research foods and herbs that combat depression such as dark chocolate, cod liver oil (which keeps your vitamin D levels up), and st john's wort (be careful as it interacts with birth control).

 

As for your receptionist job - would you like to specialise in other forms of administration one day (medical, legal, education etc)? If you have long term goals, that can help you to stay positive. Part of confidence and happiness is looking at what IS good that you have, and taking control of the things you'd like to change.

 

Everything WILL be ok.

[In the Dark]

Bah!

What does your Mother know!

You have very nice shaped arms in your photos.....and hair.

You go to the gym, although you need to up your game with the gym guy : /

So you do something to keep in shape.

 

It is rude that your younger sibling get to drive and get phones for free while you do not.

I'd be pissed.

 

I wouldn't approve of it.

 

Yes it is pointless crying about it.

 

Have you planned ever thought of going to study which may increase you career choices?

Might be something worth while to look at doing if there is any career you are really interested in getting into.

[John Cage]

Do you believe you "deserve" a blackberry? Do you believe you are "entitled" to one? No. No one's entitled to anything that they don't already have (because if you are entitled to it, then you would have had it already).

 

If I was a father and I want to give my 4th son a million dollars and my 2nd son only 124 dollars; that's up to me. It's not fair? Life is not fair. I think it's not fair that people complain about wanting life to be fair. I work hard to get where I am and thus having the power to make the decisions. If you want to make decisions, then go earn it.

 

What's your schooling background? What are you good at? Go make some money and then buy yourself something. You can buy your uncle something nice and not your parents How would they like them apples?

 

Don't whine, don't complain, just achieve.

[Shnoodle]

It will all be ok and work out.. if you take control and make it that way. It's tough but only you can do it.

Mommy and Daddy won't buy you a car, or buy you a cell phone. At 24, your choices are to either earn it yourself, deal with it, or complain like an overly-pampered 14 year old.

[mfan]

Money and moving out has to be your number one priority! Even if you have to get rid of your cellphone and stop going to the gym and stop eating in order to save money. Keep your eyes on the long term prize! Once you are out of there you will feel a lot better and your life will begin to progress. Besides, you look beautiful in your photo and I can't believe your mom said such a rude thing to you. What is the matter with her? Anyway, if you can't count on other people then you can always count on yourself. You can do it! I'd cry too in your situation but as you point out that doesn't help for long. All the best.