I need some support

[Jaeiyola]

Well. My story: My ex left for Japan a week ago. Everything about our relationship was good - the reason we broke up was because he though we should separate in this 9 months (that he'll be gone) and later on if we feel like it, we can get back together.

 

The first two days were horrible. But I am healing quickly (compared to the first time we broke up back in november). Everything was going smooth until tonight. I logged on my facebook to respond to something a friend had asked me. Then bam, right in my face, is his status. (Until tonight I had been very good about not going to his fb or his website.) He posted something about how he was really lucky - I guess something had happened to an ex gf (way before me.) I was naturally curious so I decided to check his website/blog to see if there was anything about it.

 

He blogged about Japan and how he loves it there. He also wrote how his travel buddy is trying to set him up with Japanese girls. And how he was enjoying all the attention.

 

From then on, I checked his fb page. (Another bad move.) Turns out he had changed his relationship status to single. (I guess I'm just surprise.)

 

I don't know what to think. I know the chances of us getting together is slim, but I feel like while I'm suffering and trying to get over him here, he's spending his time having fun and forgetting about me.

 

I'm not trying to cling onto anything that might not be there, but I hate the fact that he might get into a new relationship.

I tried deleting him off my friends; but last second chicken out. I'm afraid that if he does want to get a hold of me, he wouldn't be able to, if I had deleted him.

 

 

Also we were together till the moment he left to go to the airport. I even packed his bags and told him I love him.

 

I don't know what to do. I feel completely numb and out of it. I also feel like the strength I had, a few days prior is all gone.

[The_Seeker]

Jaeiyola! [hugs] I'm so sorry that happened to you. Whoa does he have GIGS or something?!

 

My ex fell in love with a European country and thinks about moving there. Broke up with me 2 months ago.

 

Instead of deleting him off of facebook [ Until he realizes whoa I could ever let the best thing go, this is where you respond because you were a selfish idiot ], delete your facebook, as if you fell off the face of the earth. That's what I did. Because...

 

A) To avoid checking his damn facebook.

B) To let him stop checking my facebook. Come on everybody check each other's facebook daily.

C) Get hobbies and make you become more like you.

D) You know who your real friends are.

E) Live your life.

 

So far I've been okay. It's tough going to places that has memories in them. Ugh.

 

In the mean time, do not contact him. Just tell him you're busy etc etc.

 

Why should you suffer, when he has such a damn swell time in Japan?

 

Why not make him suffer when you are having a swell time whatever country that you are living in at the moment and have a life with or without him? ;] Know what I mean, girl?!

[Jaeiyola]

Thanks so much for the encouragement.

 

I think part of me keeps thinking that we can make it through this and get back together. No matter how hard I try to not think about it, a little part in me still hopes.

I live in the US in a very small town. It's hard to get out. xD I am trying to reconnect with old friends, but they're working all the time.

 

Right now I'm trying to live my life without him knowing that I'm suffering through this. Last thing I need is for him to pity me.

While deleting him off fb will curb me of checking his updates; I don't know what I'm going to do when I get the urge to check his blog.

[The_Seeker]

Thanks so much for the encouragement.

 

I think part of me keeps thinking that we can make it through this and get back together. No matter how hard I try to not think about it, a little part in me still hopes.

I live in the US in a very small town. It's hard to get out. xD I am trying to reconnect with old friends, but they're working all the time.

 

Right now I'm trying to live my life without him knowing that I'm suffering through this. Last thing I need is for him to pity me.

While deleting him off fb will curb me of checking his updates; I don't know what I'm going to do when I get the urge to check his blog.

 

I don't know how old you are. Hard to tell. LOL

 

Don't bother checking his blog. Be internetless.

 

How I try to handle getting over him still is by making a checklist of things to do for the next day and listen to Don Henley all day. =P Also I did things I always wanted to do so it has been keeping me somewhat busy.

 

I want to get back with mine to since I felt I was compatible with him (first love). It's ok because I know I was the best thing he never had and he is going to soon to regret it.

 

All you can do now is love yourself more than him. If you find yourself working more and thinking more about him, ask yourself, what do I want to do right now to make myself happy? Oh right! Spa!

 

Good luck!

[Ivory_Tower]

I have to call foul on this one. I fail to understand why he would split with you just because he goes to travel or study abroad. I think he's making some weird sort of excuse. He wants to be single in Japan, but have you back here waiting for him...?

[The_Seeker]

I have to call foul on this one. I fail to understand why he would split with you just because he goes to travel or study abroad. I think he's making some weird sort of excuse. He wants to be single in Japan, but have you back here waiting for him...?

 

He's on the Grass is Greener on the Outside stage.

[Ivory_Tower]

This guy is FULL OF IT.

 

How convenient for him. "I'm heading for Japan...its just so far away...we can't get together when I come back if you want to."

[fastball2113]

i don't see what the big deal is here. you were surprised his relationship status is single, well he did say separate (break, breakup, etc.). you're hurt and that's understandable, but this could have turned into a world of ugly had he not said he needed a break while he's in Japan. i wouldnt call something a relationship if there was only talking...because thats not real, to me at least

[The_Seeker]

This guy is FULL OF IT.

 

How convenient for him. "I'm heading for Japan...its just so far away...we can't get together when I come back if you want to."

 

This is where the OP goes:

 

"You're going to have to wait because I have a relationship at the moment...it's just a wonderful feeling of having someone that understands you...we can't get together. Deuces! "

[Jaeiyola]

I have to call foul on this one. I fail to understand why he would split with you just because he goes to travel or study abroad. I think he's making some weird sort of excuse. He wants to be single in Japan, but have you back here waiting for him...?

 

Wanna know the real kicker? I'm going to Japan in the end of september for study abroad too.

I'll be in Tokyo while he's in Osaka, which is a 6 hour car trip. It still bugs me that we will be in the same COUNTRY and he's not willing to work it out.

Fr*ken 6 hours, or 2 hours if you go by bullet train.

 

I guess being pissed off is better than being sad.

Btw, we've been together for 1 year and 8 months.

[The_Seeker]

Wanna know the real kicker? I'm going to Japan in a month for study abroad too.

I'll be in Tokyo while he's in Osaka, which is a 6 hour car trip. It still bugs me that we will be in the same COUNTRY and he's not willing to work it out.

Fr*ken 6 hours, or 2 hours if you go by bullet train.

 

I guess being pissed off is better than being sad.

Btw, we've been together for 1 year and 8 months.

 

Whoa, what a jerk! o_o Then you need to get yourself a Japanese boy. ;]

[Ivory_Tower]

Whoa, what a jerk! o_o Then you need to get yourself a Japanese boy. ;]

 

I agree! He has made excuses. This really changes things now if you'll be in Japan at some point.

[Jaeiyola]

i don't see what the big deal is here. you were surprised his relationship status is single, well he did say separate (break, breakup, etc.). you're hurt and that's understandable, but this could have turned into a world of ugly had he not said he needed a break while he's in Japan. i wouldnt call something a relationship if there was only talking...because thats not real, to me at least

 

 

It's true that it's better he ended it now instead of later. I don't know if it's easier for me if he just said he was leaving me for someone else rather than saying we might get back together in the future.

[Ivory_Tower]

It's true that it's better he ended it now instead of later. I don't know if it's easier for me if he just said he was leaving me for someone else rather than saying we might get back together in the future.

 

Ohhh it's far easier to just have him leave you! Trust me.

[Jaeiyola]

Thanks guys for everything. Really. Instead of wallowing in my misery, I'm kinda pissed and humored at the same time.

 

The venting made me feel better.