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Chetto14

By Chetto14
in Sex and Romance

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greywolf Community Regular

greywolf

Posted
Posted
man and me have been going out for 6weeks now, we really love each other, we are ready to have sex but my friends tell me that it hurts from a scale to 1-10 its a 8. Does it really hurt bad? HELPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

It really depends. For some people it doesn't hurt at all and for others it does. You don't need to have sex right away. It would be better if you build up to it over a certain amount of time. That way you'll be more comfortable. The first time you have sex can be kind of embarrassing and awkward, so get to know each other's bodies better first.

 

And don't forget protection.

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d24 Collaborator

d24

Posted
Posted

I'm really sorry this is going to sound so harsh...

...but you're 14, you can tell that you're not ready for this simply from the number of exclaimation marks you've used. You're a kid, do kid things and wait a little longer till you've grown up a bit and are more mature, this is a huge life-altering decision.

Seriously, I think you should wait at least a couple more years and as everyone else has said before me - if you do decide you want to go through with this SERIOUSLY make him wear a condom and get on some birth control (e.g. the pill). Can you imagine getting pregnant at your age?

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secretness87 Enthusiast

secretness87

Posted
Posted

Sex didn't really hurt for me except the very first time he entered. After that, it just felt really uncomfortable. Then I cried lol. It was embarrassing.. and yeah. Anyway, I lost my virginity when I was 21. I would suggest you please wait until you're at least 18 and/or out of high school. I do believe you're too young!!! Please focus on school and other things. Sex can definitely wait. And trust me, it will be much better later on. Remember: sex is a special thing, and you once you lose your virginity, you can never get it back. Dating for 6 weeks is way too short.

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Kenzie76 Rookie

Kenzie76

Posted
Posted

At 14 my concern isn't the mechanics of it for you but the emotional impact. I was 18 when I lost my virginity and whether it hurt me or not was not an issue, I adored the guy I was with and had been with him for a long time, longer than 6 weeks and we were ready to go to the limit to show our feelings for each other.

 

I know you'll probably think I am some old woman who doesn't understand but I do.

 

I would wait at least a while longer, have you talked to your boyfriend about your fears about it hurting, what has he said?...you need to be able to discuss all these things with him if you're willing to give him something you will NEVER get back.

 

If you do decide to go ahead, you really need to use a condom and be prepared for the fact that it might actually be a massive disappointment to you, I know I had visions of us being more and more in love than we were before, the truth is unless those feelings are there to start with...it will just be a fumble in the dark.

 

Take Care

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Fudgie Grand Master

Fudgie

Posted
Posted

I do suggest waiting until you're 18 or older. I lost mine at 18 (almost 19) and I think that was best because I was ready. Losing your virginity can leave a great emotional impact so you need to think carefully about this and not lose it to a guy who you've only been dating for 2 months.

 

I respect your choice and I don't mean to sound like a stodgy old person but I'm just asking that you think this through VERY carefully because it would be so sad if you do something you regret. There is NO harm in waiting.

 

Anyway, if you choose to have sex, please use protection. Don't do the "pulling" out method, use a condom with a spermicide (liquid that kills sperm), you can buy a tube of it at a drugstore. Make sure he knows how to put on a condom BEFORE you start having sex

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Foxfire21 Contributor

Foxfire21

Posted
Posted
Wait until you're older.

 

It's just not worth the risk of getting pregnant or an STD. Plus, 14 year old boys can be extremely cruel. Would you be okay with all of his friends knowing? Because he'll most likely tell them.

 

Boy you can say that again. The torture I was in back in middle school and I never had sex at all.

 

Boys around 14 are very stupid and self-conscious about them self. Constantly hearing about sex and who bang who last night (Which is 85% a lie). They feel the need to bang another girl just so they can be a 'man' or be able to fit in with the rest of their friends.

 

Then when he convinces you or forces you to have sex, he's going to brag to his friends that he had sex with you and then it shall spreed like a horrible fungus! Girls might find you a * * * * and not talk to you, guys might find you easy and try to touch you! You're reputation will be tarnished while the guy will be see as an awesome dude who got some tail with you!

 

And the STD's and pregnancy risk! Really!? Do you want to risk it? you're still so young, you basically just turned into a teenager. To Me at 14, you shouldn't be dating period. you should be making friends and paying attention to your school work so you could have a bright future. when you turn at least 16, you could start dating.

 

But if you absolutely feel ready after 6 weeks (Really..think about it...is 6 weeks really that long to REALLY love and trust a guy?), PLEASE for the love of god, use a condom! I think I speak for everyone when I say I don't want you to end up pregnant or get an STD you can't get rid of.

 

And Don't fall for the "I'll pull out", "If you love me you'd do this", or "I'll only put it in for a second." crap. USE A CONDOM! He might pressure you to not use it but stay strong.

 

Oh and By the way, if this guy's not 14 and he's 18+, dumb his ass. Those guys basically have the same thought process as the 14 year guy if he's dating a young minor.

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obs Newbie

obs

Posted
Posted
It hurts more the younger you are so you should wait for atleast a few more years if you are still with the same guy you'll know its good....how * * * * y are our media getting that 14 year old girls are thinking its even fathomable to sleep with a guy after 6 weeks.

 

There's nothing wrong with having sex after dating for 6 weeks. I'd say that's pretty normal actually. Just not for 14 year olds.

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adommin Newbie

adommin

Posted
Posted
man and me have been going out for 6weeks now, we really love each other, we are ready to have sex but my friends tell me that it hurts from a scale to 1-10 its a 8. Does it really hurt bad? HELPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Another fact I feel should be pointed out is that if your "man" is anywhere near your own age, then he most definitely does not fit my definition of a "man." And if he is not near your own age? Well then that opens up an entirely different situation...

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Cognitive_Canine Enthusiast

Cognitive_Canine

Posted
Posted
Thanx u guys

 

As a lot of people stated, you're really young. There is no rush. Don't let a guy try to rush you. If a guy ever tries to push you into anything, dump him. He's rubbish.

 

Enjoy your youth and stay safe.

 

When you get older, physical parts of relationships are more enjoyable. Less stress. Less risk. You'll feel better about yourself if you wait. You'll meet better guys if you wait.

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