I feel like I am in the way

[trytotrust]

Hey guys, I have been doing really good with all of my jealousy. But, now, I feel like I am agravating her. I am trying to be as supportive as I can with everything and I end up annoying her. She seems so frustrated with me everytime I try to help. She is stressed out about EVERYTIHNG right now and I feel like I am the one that she is taking it out on. When she acts like that I get my feelings hurt and I try to talk to her about it and that makes it worse. Yesterday she just started screaming at me...so of course I lost it! How can I practice just leaving her alone when she acts like that. I know that is what she needs to calm down but I love her and I want to make things better! I know I sound pitiful, maybe I am, I just try so hard to make things perfect and I know that they can't be.

[Huxley1607306450]

If she's closing the door to expressing and sharing your feelings for each other, it would be best to give her the "space" she obviously needs. Between two people, when one closes off the door of communication, it means the person closing off doesn't want to deal with the situation. I think it's best to express your acknowledgement of the breakdown in communication, explain that no resolution is possible without communication, and your willing to give her the oppurtunity to open that door of communication when she's ready. So long as she's shutting down and refusing to face what's before her, pressing her on the issue will only lead to frustrastion and anger. Explain to her you'll give her the time and space she needs to reach a stage where she can communicate openly, and until that time support her, be there for her without expectation. Take a step back away from her just as she's done with you. You'll be able to get a better sense of your relationship with her overall and be able to make a better decision on how to approach it.

[SwingFox]

Hi trytotrust,

 

Welcome back to eNotalone.com and thank you for your update towards us. I am sorry that things still don't go as you had them planned.

 

It looks like that your girl needs a little more space indeed. That is a very hard situation, especially when you are trying to help her. Unfortunately you can't force someone in doing something, like for example make someone love you, no matter how much you want that.

 

Don't forget this, though: "The only obligation YOU have in life, is the obligation for YOU to be happy. If YOU are not happy, YOU cannot make someone else happy." It does look like that despite your efforts your woman is not even trying to communicate with you. In my opinion that can't be really fair. No matter how hard things are for her, if she is committed to you, it would be a good idea for her to explain to you how she feels and what her needs are. If that is too much asked, you might start to wonder if she is into this commitment at all.

 

Things might or might not work out with the two of you. Just keep in mind that YOU will have to be happy. Being in your situation, I would really share my concerns with her. Vary sweet words and words of love with your words of concerns. That might open her eyes.

 

I hope this was helpful for you and wish you good luck...

 

~ SwingFox ~