Day 54 - "You look...happy..."

[TSandullo]

I sometimes post my logs from the Nc challenge pt 2 thread as a separate thread.

 

I guess my reasons are simply to hear peoples comments on my progress and an indirect way of saying thank you to all the ENAers who have been incredibly supportive through my entire journey.

 

All the best everyone.

 

TS

 

Day 54 - "You look...happy..."

 

Been a while since I have logged my Nc progress here.

Been very busy with revision, report writing, family stuff and downloading movies online...

 

I feel in the past few months following our breakup, I have grown immensely.

Emotionally, I am a lot more stable now and a lot happier with things again.

My work is progressing very well also and my body....well lets say heads are turning.

Sadly though, for some odd reason, the eyes of the ladies run along my arms and accross my chest....Look at ma face ladeez

 

Why I mentioned all that, I dunno. I guess like many others on this forum, we reach the stage when we truly move on and others seem to notice......exs included.

 

And so for the past fortnight or so, me and my ex have been meeting regularly to complete a group project. Things took place but I can in no way definitively state as to whether she has any interest to reconcile or not. Either way, none of that is no longer my concern as it was months ago.

 

I recently overcame the once addictive monster of overanalysis I possessed.

I find myself a lot calmer and relaxed as a result of that.

I am a lot happier too.

 

So, yesterday after doing some work and submitting our final report, I left for the uni gym. As I was walking I met lots of friends on the way. On my way, I heard my name being called out. Turning, I saw my friend (a girl) and my ex walking. They asked how I was and where I was going etc. Then they asked if I wanted to join them for lunch.

Months back I would have jumped at the prospect of spending time with my ex. I politely declined and went gym. Ex's brows furrow.

 

Today, had a revision lesson in a lecture hall. Ex was sat behind me, I greeted her politely etc and got on with stuff. Towards the end, I dropped my pen and upon picking it up, I felt a tap on my back. Was her. With a sad look she waved bye.

Leaving the lecture hall with a friend, I saw her again and we walked together for a bit in a group of four. The other two walked ahead leaving me and my ex alone.

 

We ask how each other were etc and how revision was going. She told me what she had planned for the day. Then she looked at me and said, "You...look happy..."

 

I knew that at some point in my life she was going to say that. And I knew that she would say that with a sad look on her face.

 

I agreed, "Yeah, it's a lovely day isn't it". Soon after we parted ways.

 

I have grown stronger over the months. The sudden urgent desire to reconcile is gone.

I still know nothing of her current relationship status. Funny enough, a few days ago I had a dream that me and Bruce Willis were sitting together looking at her facebook profile. When I woke up I was glad it was a dream...then I remembered Bruce Willis was sat next to me and I felt sad it was a dream...

 

And that was that.

 

I know she will contact me next week though....about my birthday. If she wishes to meet up and give me a gift, I will politely decline while mentioning that she hug her kid from me on her bday (her daughter's bday is a few days after mine).

 

So that is my current NC log. Only after graduating will true NC begin.

 

I think I have done great in the meantime.

 

TS

[Lastchallenge]

Strong! I salute u... Good job on keeping your cool

[bish0p2004]

Excellent work, man. Much respect for your mental strength.

[getbiii]

hey TS i remember reading your posts a while back,

you have gone a long way my friend!

its great hearing this news from you =)

 

seems like the roles are reverzed now!

i guess its like they say, they come back when you really let go and move on?

or something like that?

[brandnewday47]

Well done TS... you always seem to be in a positive forward thinking mindset, and I'm sure your going to continue to make the best of what life presents to you.

[TSandullo]

Thank you all once again for your kind words and support.

 

I have a long way to go still but and going to get there. The journey has been worthwhile.

 

A happy to the rest of you as well.

 

TS

[sighh]

Very nice read.

And you're doing great. Keep it up

[Tangz]

good stuff mate