i need advice badly!

[stacy]

hey. i'm 19 years old, and have been going out with my bf for a year and a half. We plan to stay together and get married, but arent ready for that yet. We have talked about sex quite a bit, and we both want it, but I am just scared of pregnancy. After a year and a half I am very close to him, but is it right to have sex yet? Also, i dont really want to go on the pill, but we plan on using a condom, pulling out before he ejaculates, and only having sex like once a month when i think im not ovulating, right before my period. HOw safe is this??

[Mythical_Suicide]

my personal opinion is.. if you even have to ask urself or anyone else if you're ready and you just cant say "yes, im ready" then you aren't ready to have sex.. I dont care how long you've been with a person.. If you have the smallest amount of doubt, then dont do it..

That's just my .02 though.

 

-Mythical Suicide-

[avman]

Use of a condom is pretty safe. Pregnancy rates are around 3% if used PERFECTLY. Unfortunately people don't tend to do that, and then the pregnancy rate is around 14% for typical use.

 

How about adding another form of birth control like the Depo-Provera shot? Adding that along with using a condom would make a chance of pregnancy extremely low.

 

Whether its right to have sex yet is really a decision you need to make. You are 19 - so you are old enough to make up your own mind. Do you love him? Do you trust him completely? Do you personally feel ready? If the answer to all of these is yes - then I think you've probably got the answer to your question

 

avman

[stacy]

thanks guys for the advice..and yes i do love him and trust him. I guess I am just sort of scared of the pain, since I'm a virgin. I dont really know what to expect and I've heard all of these horror stories of your first time. DO you know how much the shot is and where I can get it at??

[ang3l2004]

Hi Stacy,

If you feel you are ready trust and love him then do it only if you are really ready to make that step,I would say b4 you go through with it if that is what you choose go to a local health dept and talk to someone about it they can answer most of your questions and work something out with you to get on birth control or the shot,But be sure you are ready that is something really special and u can only lose it once so be sure you would be making the right decision,But go to your local health department or something like that and make sure you talk to someone they can help lots good luck and be sure to think about it before you take that step

[laroxes]

When we had been together for a long time & had advanced to a comfortable trusting relationship & getting more intimate with each other it just seemed like the next thing to do at the right time when we had sex for the first time on our wedding night. You wont have to ask others. You'll know all by yourself.

[JonnyG]

If u have to ask, then no your not ready.

 

Secondly, why if your worried about pregnancy, won't u go on the pill?

 

Third, don't expect him to pull out in the heat of the moment everytime.

 

Fourthly, once a month!!!! U reackon your going to be both happy with that amount of sex?

 

If you take the pill, and he uses a condom correctly, the chances of you becoming pregnant is nearly neglible.

[Tinkerbell]

By the sounds of it you're very much in love with him, just afraid of the pain. No matter how long you wait the pain is always going to be there, it's just an obstacle you have to overcome. The good part is that the majority of woman only feel pain the first time and are alright after that. Use a lubricant if you're really worried.

As for the Depo Provera shot, visit link removed and you should find all the information you need there.

~Tink