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Why single man get involved with married women?


pixie1985

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I met someone, 4 years ago, before I married my husband, I saw him later in my life, he is gorgeous, charming and just perfect in bed (amazing perfect)I like him a lot, My husband is a total Prik, and a control freak. But my question is why is he interested? Im not gonna lie, I am pretty, Im fit, and have no kids. Would love to have kids, but due to an abortion I had ( which I was forced to do) I can no longer have my own.

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Avman, I tried leaving several times, he won't let me go... Im sick of it, but I don't know how to get out of it. I know it sounds stupid and helpless, but it is what it is. And I wish I could be with him ( my lover) ... we had sex for the first time last nite, and it was everything I ever dreamed of... I am just wondering what the heck is going through his mind!

And if I'll ever see him again, after last nite...

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It's hard to answer your question about why he's interested because we don't know him. But, I have been a single guy involved with a married woman and for me it was because I felt really connected with her right from the beginning. (And obviously it was a real connection... she isn't married anymore and we've been in a relationship for almost five years now.)

 

You said this guy is good in bed. Maybe he's interested because you guys have good sex. Good sex is addictive.

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I'd guess because there are not many consequences with a married women. The husband does all the boring relationship stuff, the single guy gets to do all the fun exciting stuff. And if you attach he can simply walk away. Just guessing though, and assumes no emotional attachment on the single guy side.

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Some men just dont care, just like some women do not care if the person they are seeing is married. If you are going to portray your husband as such then it doesnt say much for the fact you are staying with him other than the fact that you are co-dependent.

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Avman, I tried leaving several times, he won't let me go... Im sick of it, but I don't know how to get out of it. I know it sounds stupid and helpless, but it is what it is. And I wish I could be with him ( my lover) ... we had sex for the first time last nite, and it was everything I ever dreamed of... I am just wondering what the heck is going through his mind!

And if I'll ever see him again, after last nite...

 

Not sure what you mean by "he won't let me go". So you file the paperwork. What does it matter what he says? You do not need his consent. If it is that bad (and it sure sounds like it is) then you need to be the one to take action and end it.

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If the OP left her husband for the other man, then the dynamics would change. Her lover would no longer be a mystery or sexy enigma of a man. He would be her bf or husband and thus lose his appeal.

 

As a woman who has been involved with committed men before, the appeal was that they wouldnt latch onto me. I could have fun and sex and not have to worry about relationship issues.

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I love him, that's why I married him. He turned into a complete defferent person after a few months, I discovered a lot of things about him, I did not know. But, when I try to leave, and I am completely serious about it, he becomes himself again and convices me of staying. hes fine for a few weeks, and starts being a total jerk again. right now, I just don't talk to him nor do I care, he misstreated me in such a way, that I became numb to his abuse. right now, Im just waiting for him to get sick of me not caring, and to get up and leave. I tried, several times, I did. Lord Knows...

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Well then, by all means keep your mystery man. lol If you are miserable, and you have tried to leave, but the hubs wont let you, to hell with him. No since in you being miserable all the time. At least you can have some great sex.

 

I realize my post is controversial as most people say "leave him". But it is never as cut and dried as it sound on here and if she cant leave, might as well enjoy herself!

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Avman, I tried leaving several times, he won't let me go... Im sick of it, but I don't know how to get out of it. I know it sounds stupid and helpless, but it is what it is. And I wish I could be with him ( my lover) ... we had sex for the first time last nite, and it was everything I ever dreamed of... I am just wondering what the heck is going through his mind!

And if I'll ever see him again, after last nite...

 

It's not that he won't let you go. It's that you won't let go of him. Nothing is really stopping if you, if you want to leave.

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well then, by all means keep your mystery man. Lol if you are miserable, and you have tried to leave, but the hubs wont let you, to hell with him. No since in you being miserable all the time. At least you can have some great sex.

 

I realize my post is controversial as most people say "leave him". But it is never as cut and dried as it sound on here and if she cant leave, might as well enjoy herself!

 

 

 

thank you!!!!!!!

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Well then, by all means keep your mystery man. lol If you are miserable, and you have tried to leave, but the hubs wont let you, to hell with him. No since in you being miserable all the time. At least you can have some great sex.

 

I realize my post is controversial as most people say "leave him". But it is never as cut and dried as it sound on here and if she cant leave, might as well enjoy herself!

 

I think she should tell her husband first, before she just continues with the side relationship. If everyone's okay with it, then it's allright. But as of now, she's cheating and breaching the marriage contract.

 

If you tell him you're cheating, that would be a pretty easy reason to divorce. lol.

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How can you be so sure that this other guy would stay with you, if you decided to leave your husband? He may very well feel that if you can cheat on your husband, you can just as easily cheat on him.

 

I don't want to stay with him, I don't know what I want with him, all i know is this rush from top to bottom I feel right now, That honestly I never felt, never. Not even when I was a teenager.

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I don't want to stay with him, I don't know what I want with him, all i know is this rush from top to bottom I feel right now, That honestly I never felt, never. Not even when I was a teenager.

 

It's called lust and infatuation...and is fleeting.

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I think she should tell her husband first, before she just continues with the side relationship. If everyone's okay with it, then it's allright. But as of now, she's cheating and breaching the marriage contract.

 

If you tell him you're cheating, that would be a pretty easy reason to divorce. lol.

 

Good point. OP...can you tell her husband about your "special friend"?

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Is any one on the other side of the fence? I mean, with a married woman, in a similar position as he would be????

 

You are obsessing on what HE thinks about YOU. Why does it really matter? It's not exactly like you can have a committed relationship with him while you are married to someone else.

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OP..there is also a website that I went to years ago when I was the other woman and I cannot remember it now. It has posts by wives, hubs, and other women and other men. I think that you will relate to them better. Let me do some googling...so hold on...

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I think she should tell her husband first, before she just continues with the side relationship. If everyone's okay with it, then it's allright. But as of now, she's cheating and breaching the marriage contract.

 

If you tell him you're cheating, that would be a pretty easy reason to divorce. lol.

 

I like your answer

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pixie, do what you enjoy and for whatever reasons you enjoy it. Just be honest with yourself and if the "why" is truly a reason you'd rather not live with, then change the way you live. It's not for other people to make your judgement calls, especially on personal matters, unless you already know what you want and have trouble getting it.

That said, is the breakup something you want 100%? Or are you staying with your husband for the excitement of the 'mystery man'?

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