Frustration with a girl i dont think i can have

[JohnDoe11]

I am about as frustrated as it gets right now. Why? Because of a girl. A girl who i like so bad much it hurts, and yet a cant have her. It not that i cant, but its that i think i cant. I dont know if she really likes me beyond friendship, or if the line is drawn at "a good friend." She is sending me signals that she wants me to take the initiative and ask her out, but i have no confidence in my signal reading ability. Also, I absolutly love having her as an ally in this ***ed up world and dont want to loose her by asking her out. On top of it all, she is friking beautiful, and everytime i see her i think more so. She kills me with her eyes, but i just tough it out so she doens't think i am interested. I cannot stop thinking about her for more than 5 minutes strait unless i am doing somthing extreamly physical. The frustration comes from me wanting her as a friend, and a girlfiend. I sense her frustration as well when i talk to her because i will not take the initiative and tell her what i think of her. I think she know but the longer i go without telling her the more she probobly doubts herself. I want her so bad, and there is yet another thing stoping me, above all, her brother is my best friend. He has said previusly that he wouldnt mind, without me even asking if he minded, but in my eyes there is no way i can keep this friendship strong if i am seeing his sister. I have utmost respect for her borther though, so i think this situation is pretty much ***ed as it gets. For christs sakes, i dont even want another girlfriend, because i dont think i can care this much about anyone else. i cant forget her. what should i do...

[disEnchantid]

hey john

life is too short...tell her how you feel and be honest and sincere. express your concerns about losing her as friend, etc..but get it out there! you will feel so much better if you do!

 

best of luck!

-dE

[ForAnother]

You gotta think of it as, "hmm will a chain of events occur" rather than, "Oh man I am gonna get the shut down right here right now." If she says no to the signals and stuff, well now she knows she is liked, and depending on how much she likes you she will consider it. But risks are risks, you don't get the best in this world without taking some crazy good risks.

 

~ForAnother

[sprkal]

Hey! I bet she is dying for you to make a move! She's probably just as confused/unsure as you! Stop being so male and make a move, I dont think you'll regret it. If I'm wrong, and she doesnt share your feelings, I dont think that she will let that get in the way of the two of u having a great friendship still - if she does, then she isnt worth ur time!

 

Good Luck!

 

- sprkal*

[Rysen]

I agree with everyone that has all ready posted.

 

A few years ago there was this girl that I really liked. She was beautiful and we got along really well. I had so many awesome talks with her that, I just fell for her more and more. I thought she had an interest in me, she gave me a lot of signals, and so I finally decided that I should confront her about how I felt.

 

A part of her really wanted to be with me. Appearntly she almost said "yes", but, because of circumstances (ie. too busy with school, etc) she decided it wasn't in her best interest to be in a relationship at that time. Despite not having what I had wanted to happen, I felt a heck of a lot better just letting it out. And then about a month or so later I met my (now ex) girlfriend who I shared a wonderful year and a half with. Because I had gotton my feelings out, and found out that nothing more would come of it, I was able to catch an opportunity I would have other wise missed out on.

 

As someone all ready said, you only live once, so make the most of it!

 

Oh and if you're wondering, to this day that girl is one of the greatest friends I have. So even though what I had originally wanted to happen, didn't, I was still better off just letting her know how I felt. You never know until you try.

 

Good luck!

[dude123]

I would say the only thing that I can say. You sound just like me. I am in the same situation right now and I don't know what to do because like you if I do tell her I don't want to lose her. I care for her too much. I just don't know what to do anymore. I don't know.