I am about as frustrated as it gets right now. Why? Because of a girl. A girl who i like so bad much it hurts, and yet a cant have her. It not that i cant, but its that i think i cant. I dont know if she really likes me beyond friendship, or if the line is drawn at "a good friend." She is sending me signals that she wants me to take the initiative and ask her out, but i have no confidence in my signal reading ability. Also, I absolutly love having her as an ally in this ***ed up world and dont want to loose her by asking her out. On top of it all, she is friking beautiful, and everytime i see her i think more so. She kills me with her eyes, but i just tough it out so she doens't think i am interested. I cannot stop thinking about her for more than 5 minutes strait unless i am doing somthing extreamly physical. The frustration comes from me wanting her as a friend, and a girlfiend. I sense her frustration as well when i talk to her because i will not take the initiative and tell her what i think of her. I think she know but the longer i go without telling her the more she probobly doubts herself. I want her so bad, and there is yet another thing stoping me, above all, her brother is my best friend. He has said previusly that he wouldnt mind, without me even asking if he minded, but in my eyes there is no way i can keep this friendship strong if i am seeing his sister. I have utmost respect for her borther though, so i think this situation is pretty much ***ed as it gets. For christs sakes, i dont even want another girlfriend, because i dont think i can care this much about anyone else. i cant forget her. what should i do...
