how can you just flat out ignore someone?

[citymouse]

OMG! You live in Flagstaff! I used to go to NAU and lived on Ponderosa Parkway like 20,000 years ago. Great little western town... small world!

 

But yeah, ITA!!!

[Nickk]

Its been 7 months for me since the breakup of a 6 year relationship and ihavent heard a single word from him since the day he left me. Dropped off the face of the planet.

what a * * * * head, i dont understand how people can do that, i really dont!

[Crazyaboutdogs]

My ex also suffered from "ignore syndrome" and would not respond to me for days, then weeks at a time. I eventually got fed up and stopped contacting him at all. When I stopped trying that was the end of that...he never bothered to contact me and ended up marrying someone else. These kind of ignore tactics like my ex did, like your ex is doing is simply just a power play..they need to feel superior and like the notion of you waiting with baited breath for the "privilege" of their contact. Just remember that with people who behave like that, it is no big honour to converse with them..they are not god, they are not the Queen, they are not the President of the United States, they are not a celebrity (except maybe in their own mind LOL). So don't waste your time being upset that his Royal Highness, does not contact you...he craps like everyone else, his blood is red like everyone else, and he is no different from anyone else. If he wants to ignore you then it is his loss and you should move on to bigger and better things in your life than wasting it on a man suffering from "ignore syndrome".

[miss_sunshine86]

wish me luck on my night out..............its raining and cold and im worried after a drink id miss him and try to call..........i have to not call, its been 3 weeks and nothing, so i should be strong by now

[SapphireNoir10]

Good luck!

 

I sometimes wonder if dissapearing is their way of dealing with the break up. Maybe if they were to talk to us or anything they'd become tempted to come back.

[bigcream55]

Simply AMAZING post!

[citymouse]

 

I sometimes wonder if dissapearing is their way of dealing with the break up. Maybe if they were to talk to us or anything they'd become tempted to come back.

 

I think more often than not they disappear because if they look at us, it would be like looking in the mirror at themselves and seeing the results of their own shameful, chicken sh1t behavior.

 

And that wouldn't square away with their over-inflated egos, would it?

 

They don't want to get their hands dirty. They want to leave the mess behind and make a clean getaway, meanwhile we are left behind trying to find a way to cope and move on with all these question marks hanging in the air.

 

It sickens me when I think how sensitive I was trying to be to his feelings; little did I know he was just toying with me as if I were a bright, shiny, disposable object. I give more common courtesy to strangers than he ended up giving to me. He discarded me like last week's spoiled milk. I'm sure he rarely thinks of me, if at all.

 

I just think it is stunning that he could say "I love you" as he walked out the door after we spent the night, and then it was like a light switch went off in his head, and he just vanished from my life. Just like that.

[floods88]

in my experience, my ex ignored me a few times and then split up with me in a phone call.

 

i asked to see him so that we could talk properly (i felt that i needed at least that after 3 years) and he said he couldnt see me because he wouldnt be strong enough to say it to my face because i would change his mind.

 

pathetic.

[peanutbutterandjelly]

same thing happened to me. he broke up with me after he spent the whole weekend with me. He claimed that he tried breaking up with me in person a few times over the weekend but couldnt. So he broke up with over the phone the next day and said it was because he was a coward.

[verylonely]

same thing happened to me. he broke up with me after he spent the whole weekend with me. He claimed that he tried breaking up with me in person a few times over the weekend but couldnt. So he broke up with over the phone the next day and said it was because he was a coward.

 

Mine also admitted to being a coward, broke up with me over txt after 2 years together - after an argument - 37 year old with the maturity of a 12 year old!!!

[arsenic_n_lace]

Well we were together for three years and he broke up with me over a text message too...so pathetic.

 

And i've definitely learnt my lesson, i'm never going to give him the satisfaction of contacting him again because he's not worth it and i don't owe him anything.

 

And this is going to sound silly but deep down i don't even want to be friends with him because he's a different person but when i start talking to him i get stupid and think maybe the old ___ will come back but he never does. I guess more than anything i want an apology but that'll probably never happen.

 

I also kind of think that maybe he contacts me to make himself feel better? Maybe he just wants to talk to me for a bit to make sure that i'm okay and then once he knows that he can go on his merry way and not have guilt or feel bad about the situation.

 

I guess i just need to realize that he's not the same person anymore and accept that, however I have moved on and i'm proud of that, i'm not in love with him anymore which is a great thing!

[peanutbutterandjelly]

I also kind of think that maybe he contacts me to make himself feel better? Maybe he just wants to talk to me for a bit to make sure that i'm okay and then once he knows that he can go on his merry way and not have guilt or feel bad about the situation.

 

probably. he talks to you and gets his "fix" and then he is good for a while. It is most likely helping him heal

[mad rabbits]

My ex did this, and I, like others here, felt profundly disrespected, particularly when it was HIM who insisted I be his friend and then would ignore my replies to emails HE sent ME.

 

So then I was like, fine, you don't want to talk to me? Then you lose the option of talking to me FOREVER. I blocked his email addresses, phone, deleted him off all my social networks, the lot - and left it that way from that point forward.

 

I do not exist for the convenience and benefit of those who do not care at all about my feelings.

[ackerman]

ignorance, text, email is the easy way out of anything, doesnt always mean they dont care but they do not have the courage or strength to break it to you other ways. They just shut you out, its a defence tactic. Thats just their way of dealing with leaving you. I would agree that this is guilt, he feels bad and wants to know your ok every now and then. Alot of people who take the easy way out do not like that about themselves but simply do it for that reason, its easiest. I know how difficult it can be to be on the receiving end of this, for that person it is heart breaking.

[heartbroken100]

My ex did this, and I, like others here, felt profundly disrespected, particularly when it was HIM who insisted I be his friend and then would ignore my replies to emails HE sent ME.

 

So then I was like, fine, you don't want to talk to me? Then you lose the option of talking to me FOREVER. I blocked his email addresses, phone, deleted him off all my social networks, the lot - and left it that way from that point forward.

 

I do not exist for the convenience and benefit of those who do not care at all about my feelings.

Wow....I could not have said it better myself. I am going to do exactly the same. Even as a friend you are continuously opening up your heart. Then when THEY contact YOU asking a specific question etc. and you respond, in return you get ignored. This is happening to me ALL the time. He might as well have just said "I'm just checking to see if you are still at my beck n call, I will leave now until I feel you pulling away again. Then I will be back". That is exactly what all these ex's are doing!!!!!!

[Hobbes]

I've got nothing in 3.5 months, not a squeak. It hurts like hell after everything we went through. Anyways I'm just repeating myself lol, I post about it every night. I am feeling better though. Still in disbelief more than anything. Hope you are all doing ok tonight.

[AmandaB]

what a * * * * head, i dont understand how people can do that, i really dont!

 

Oh ya, we were basically best friends for 2 years before the 6 of dating so a total of 8 years and we were engaged for 3.5 of those years. He's acting like a baby!

[mad rabbits]

Wow....I could not have said it better myself. I am going to do exactly the same. Even as a friend you are continuously opening up your heart. Then when THEY contact YOU asking a specific question etc. and you respond, in return you get ignored. This is happening to me ALL the time. He might as well have just said "I'm just checking to see if you are still at my beck n call, I will leave now until I feel you pulling away again. Then I will be back". That is exactly what all these ex's are doing!!!!!!

 

That's true heartbroken, they are indeed just "checking in" to see whether we are still waiting even though they don't want us...

 

I can recommend blocking them, mainly for peace of mind. You will no longer have to feel anxious wondering when they are next going to "drop a bomb" and message you, or whether they are going to reply to you...

 

After all you are broken up so it's time to sever all ties.

 

Additionally they are not considering your feelings at all and are simply getting an ego stroke knowing you are still there pining for them while they are moving on. You are helping them to heal while being their friend but it is doing nothing for you but causing you heartache.

 

If they really cared they would not be treating us like this in the first place so severing all ties is simply making real the thing they want but do not have the guts, or are too selfish, to do. That being so it isn't as if you are even hurting them. You are just giving them the same consideration and respect they have given you, which is none. All is fair in love and war as they say.