Post here instead of contacting your ex!

[janut1]

So far today has been bad. Woke up in a panic again remembering that you are no longer in my life. I cannot wait for that part to end. I miss you and wish I was with you on our planned trip because it would of been fun. We always had fun. I do know now that I was a rebound for you, but a long rebound of 19 months, which is unusual. But, nothing I can do or say can make this all better. I have to take one day at a time and move on.

[Stuck]

I love you! I never told you that but I wanted to many times. I felt it all of the time. You are wonderful and you made me feel so happy and valued and you made me laugh. I know you love me too. Im sorry I had to leave, I wish I could have stayed with you.

[hopelessincan]

Hey. Youre a $hithead. But still a $hithead that was good for me.

 

Felt good tonight to hear from people that you're an a$$ if you're gone...cause apparently I treated you pretty well. Guess everyone else saw what you and i couldnt or wouldnt.... we were good together.... despite being different.

 

I had a wicked night. And you should have seen how well I played. I know you would have been singing my praises. So glad you werent there!

 

Enjoy waiting............ I actually think you are going to wake up one day and think what did i do? i know it will be too late then...but hey story of my life right

[hopelessincan]

I love you! I never told you that but I wanted to many times. I felt it all of the time. You are wonderful and you made me feel so happy and valued and you made me laugh. I know you love me too. Im sorry I had to leave, I wish I could have stayed with you.

 

Then why did you leave?!

[3Tears]

I miss your voice... I miss the good times and the laughs, I sit on my bed waiting for a text of yours or a call but I know that will never happen...

 

I need to move on, but its so hard.

[fjmslm]

I haven't posted here in a few day....cause I gave in and emailed you. Your reply to keep things to work only hurt so much. I know you are right, I wish I hadn't given in, I know I am only pushing you further away, further into your fears every time i do that. If you are going to come back to me it won't be this way. But I can't stop hoping.

 

I can't see myself ever stop hoping, because what we had could have been perfect, you know it was. I know you agree, and if you didn't already have the boys ..........

 

please come back to me

[fjmslm]

i love you with all my heart

[thetwist]

I miss you again today, but I've realized I can definitely live without you. It's funny... I was in your life the year when things were extremely tough for you esp. financially. You were alone and messed up, but I consoled you, supported you emotionally, listened to you, encouraged you, and even paid for your stupid games.

 

Now your life has started to improve, and I became so happy for you. But then we had that stupid fight and you were so freakin' quick to dump me like I meant nothing... all those times I was there apparently means nothing to you.

 

I feel so used.

 

But I know you are going to regret letting me go. I am sure of it. I am becoming a better and a stronger person. I hope I get over you very quickly, so I can be the happy, cheerful, fun loving and awesome once again. I am by no means a perfect person, but one thing I pride myself on is the ability to learn from my mistakes and improve myself. And I will find someone way better than you.

 

I hope you see the improved me in the arms of another man, and I hope your heart shatters into tiny pieces.

[fjmslm]

The guy I'm staying with this week is from Islay!!! Our place! Our girl! Why are there so any coincidences in our lives reminding me we should be together!! So many things and signs that we should be together!

So many things I want to tell you lately, I miss not sharing our whole lives

[3Tears]

I miss you... but I know you don't miss me, you would have text or emailed me by now.

 

I should have never let you in so close to me.

[Ebeach2]

I can't believe that after 5 years, after all of the support I gave you with your mental issues, the times I'd lay awake and dream about the future with you in it, the sacrifices I made for you, all the ways I spoiled you and invested my time and love and heart into you, you could so easily tell me your not in love with me anymore. Seems like once you got the job I lined up for you and worked so hard for you to get, and once you got on the right medicine to make you feel "happy" again, you threw me away like I was useless. Like everything I had done for you meant nothing.

 

I now look back and realize all of the things you did to hurt me. Maybe it was unintentional, but it still hurt. You making promises and not keeping them because you wanted to do your own thing. Not giving me an ounce of appreciation when I'd come home from work before I had to go to college at night and I'd rush to make sure dinner was waiting for you when you got home. How I would write you love notes on the mirror for you to wake up to, and all you said was "aw, thats sweet." And once I questioned you about how different you had started to act, you made me think I was crazy and told me repeatedly how insecure I was.

 

That night you came to my house sobbing that you just didn't love me anymore, I should've told you exactly how I felt. I should've told you what a user and coward you had been for letting me believe that I was the crazy one and nothing was wrong. Something happened to you that made you believe that I was no longer worthy of you, and made you want to become selfish and unappreciative and not care at all about me.

 

That is something I will question for a very long time. How come you didn't fight for me? How come you played me like a fool when you were the only person on this earth I really trusted? I hope one day I can stop loving you and just look at you as a learning experience. I don't want to be angry at you, I want you to be angry with yourself. I don't want to wish bad on you, but I do hope you feel the hurt that you have caused me sometime in your life. That way, you know to never do it to another...

[abstractxparad]

You are still camping in my obsessive thoughts every day. Hard to believe you are out there alive and well and I am probably barely ever in my thoughts; if and when I am, you wave them away, smoke your problems away. Hopefully one day you will find that you have to feel pain to live and can't just numb the bad feelings and feel the good ones. We were very incompatible and I hope I can be happy with our joint decision one day. But for now, I am grieving.

[Jatli]

Get out of my head!!!!!!!!!

[RougeQueen]

Let me ask you something: did you write the Cheater's Strategy Guide and Phrase Book? Or do you just take quotes from it and model your behaviour after it's handy "how to be the biggest D-bag you can be" chapter?

 

When I take a step back and think about everything you said to me, all the back pedalling, flimsy but believable excuses, and lies I can't help but chuckle a little at how absolutelt textbook you are. It borders on absurd. The Cheater's Guild should make you the poster boy and ideal for the Classic Cheater model.

 

But, you're not my problem any more, you're your other gf's now (poor girl). She probably has no idea that you were dating me while you were also dating her for the past how many years. Which one of us was the woman on the side? Or were we both playing second fiddle to yet another woman? Or even another? Wouldn't surprise me in the slightest.

 

I'm in a maelstrom of confusion and hurt after gaining this new knowledge of the depths of douchebaggery that you can sink to.

 

I was doing pretty good for the past few weeks and I kind've wish I wouldnt've found out about this new bs and just continued on my merry way. But alas, life had another kick to my lady cajones to administer and I'll walk this off too, in time.

 

I really hope Karma puts on her a$$kicking boots and pays you a nice long visit. Perhaps even moves in. But what I think I want more is for me to not care what happens to you either way. That's my goal. I don't want to be hung up on the hurt and the how could he do this merry-go-round. One day at a time.

[thetwist]

Why did you have to be so shallow? Why did you reluctantly accept my 'flaws' instead of embracing them? It's not like you look like a gorgeous male model; you are not even close to it!

 

I embraced and adored everything about your body, yet you couldn't do the same for me.

[fjmslm]

i miss you and i love you, you know I would give my life for you. I don't want to move away, i don't care about any of that. I just want to be with you and our Isla

[IAmFCA]

i still look at your fb and i wish i could send you a note saying i agree with your cover photo

 

but then, also, yes, you should ponder that question. because the answer is because you are an ah, and the ah nature of you is in contrast to the simplicity of your intention.

 

but yeah, there is a reason you are not rich, and that is it. you are ridiculously smart and i miss your steel trap brain. it was your sexiest characteristic, and what you could accomplish without your clothes on was so sexy in part because of what is between your ears. so yes, you are smarter than everyone else, and no, you are not compensated for it. and while you mean to be asking a rhetorical question, the answer is... because you're an ah.

 

if, 5 years from now, you presented yourself to me, somehow freed of your wife and cured of your ah nature, would i reconsider you? you know? maybe. but i will be off the market by then.

 

there will be a day when you learn that i am off the market for good, and it will matter. that is... weird. i think we loved each other. so... not what love is. it will be tragic, in a way, to have to turn you away.

[LOL1607309392]

we only dated for 4 months, but i fell so hard for you. i wish you could see that i was worth a second chacne, i always saw it in you. then i tell myslf you are are SO wrong for me for so many reaons but i'm not ready to give up on you.

 

i hate that you ignored me the first week when i tried to get back with you, never understood how you could do that..i miss you so much.

 

i will always loveand care fo ryou.

[thetwist]

I was remembering the time when you first told me you had a crush on me. It was a life changing moment for me... you were the first and only man to have shown any romantic interest in me.

 

And now you left me.

 

Oh, I can live without you. But I will admit I miss the good and fun times we had.

[IAmFCA]

huh. maybe i loved you. i think i did. misplaced. but the aftermath of it, the residue left behind, feels like i still do. not like Oh I want you etc, but more like, I have always and remain soft in my heart for you. So, yeah, i think i loved you. And, i dont know, you hurt the hell out of me, and you wouldn't do that to someone you loved. but i think you felt love and then tried to ruin it, over and over. because i have seen how you are with your exes, and i have received none of that from you, only safety from you.

 

Such chaos in my life. And you, irreplaceable. You would not like each other.

 

"B, I loved you. He is not you, nobody is. Respect him, for me at least. He is a good man."

[RougeQueen]

My chest aches today and I've noticed I've been sighing a lot. It seems to help, strangely. I know this is a psychosomatic reaction to emotional pain, but control of my mind and emotions doesn't seem to be my own right now.

 

Sigh. Damn. I can feel a headache coming on too.

 

Work was torture today even if I only went in for a few hours. I kept rehashing everything every few minutes and getting buried under a torrent of sadness, anger, and pain again and again. I actually felt nauseous all day. I blame yoga for strengthening the whole mind/body connection and making emotional pain into damn near debilitating physical pain as well. Just kidding.

 

Hah! I'm going to be fine. If I can still crack jokes-- as weak as they are-- you and your bullsh*t haven't broken me down completely. That would've been my most grieved loss. If you had managed to kill my humour.

 

However, looking into the future, it just seems like I have such a long way to go to stop hurting and get over you. It's like standing at the bottom of a mountain and being told you have to get to the top by only walking on your hands. Backwards. It seems impossible and endless and you don't even want to start because what's the point? On the other hand, you know that once you finally do get there, you'll be happy and all the pain and frustration was worth it. Not to mention you're upper body strength would be phenomenal. Hardy har.

 

I wish there was a way to agree to feel the whole load of pain in one shot and then be done with it. As you're there writhing on the ground you know that it'll be over soon and then you can get on with your life completely washed clean. But, that's now how things work and I'll have to tough this out for however long it takes for my mind and heart to heal from the thrashing it's taken.

 

Sigh.

[Jewels7]

I'm so confused. I hate you and love you at the same time. I just wish you were honest with me. There's so many things I'm so confused about. Whether you lied to me or not. And I think you abused me. But at the same time I know somewhere you're a good person. That's what I don't get. And I don't get why I love you and miss you so much after the way you treated me. I don't know why I'm the one who left you and yet I'm having trouble letting go while I feel like you've probably moved on. I wonder if you miss me the way I miss you. Sometimes I want to die and I hate you and I hate myself for letting you have that power over me.

[fjmslm]

How have you managed to not slip once, it was always you that's was able to be more committed to this relationship until now, how do you manage it, you wanted us from the beginning, why did you let go just as I was ready, why did you tell me those things, make me those rings, you didn't just buy me gifts, you spent hours and hours making them, made love to me like neither of has ever experienced or likely to again, you are a foolish man because you can't stand up for what you want and instead just play along with her, you will never be happy

[thetwist]

Oh man, I could hardly sleep last night because I kept thinking about you. I just want all the pain and sadness to be over, that's it.

[Astroboy]

Maria, you beautiful woman, I'm still in love with you 6 months after we agreed it was best we split. I wrote this back then and wish you could read it..

 

Gone

 

When all is said and done,

the long road traveled comes to an end.

An old man holds the door open one last time,

his wrinkled face not concealing his sadness.

 

soft coloured petals that fall like dust,

through shards of sunlight to the ground.

swirling in the fading warmth as a whirlpool,

Gently slowing, landing on icy cold.

 

the spring unwinds to nothing,

the great healer has left.

only the fire consumes us now,

the clock’s hands frozen in time.

 

And silence now,

softly rolling like velvet.

How delicate to touch is the peace,

the memories only dulled and faintly ring.