HighRoad Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 Ok, I am a female and so pardon me if I sound like I don't know why men would like to just have sex with a stranger. I guess, I don't want to and so I have a hard time understanding why others would. But! Men - can you tell us why you (might) like to just get some girl into bed and then dump her, leave her, having never even planned to do more than just get her into bed. I know alot of men are not like this and would be appalled to even think of this. But, is it worth all the agida and chase to just get a little bit of something when you could actually get the whole meal if you just stuck around? I don't think it would be worth all the bother and the hassle to try and mess with someone just to get a little (not very easy) sex. Just a random thought for the end of a long summer weekend. Interested n hearing what others have to say. Link to comment
Celestialagape54 Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 Not to play devils advocate here but there are plenty of women who do this sort of thing as well, it might be interesting to hear from them as well... Link to comment
orangesoda Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 the same reason that women get dressed up, go to bars, and bathe in the male attention, soak up the flirting, and enjoy the free drinks. Because it makes you feel good. Link to comment
HeartGoesOn Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 I'm not a man, but I'll chime in and say that if a woman gives her consent to sex that soon, she has no right to later complain, if he "bails." Especially when there is no talk of being exclusive, or being in a commited relationship. Link to comment
LAYAAN Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 coz some women are able to provide easy sex. Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 I'm not a man, but I'll chime in and say that if a woman gives her consent to sex that soon, she has no right to later complain, if he "bails." Especially when there is no talk of being exclusive, or being in a commited relationship. I agree completely. They owe you nothing early on. Link to comment
hexaemeron Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 That's like asking "Why would you eat this delicious steak?" or "Would you be happy if you win the lottery?" or if I made a thread called "Women! Why do you all want to talk about your feelings?" Some people are just more carnally-minded than others. I don't think anyone should mislead someone just to get laid, but if everyone's on the same page, who cares? Link to comment
HighRoad Posted September 7, 2009 Author Share Posted September 7, 2009 Hmmmm ... interesting comments! thanks everybody so far. How about this then, why do some men (people) try and TRICK others into having sex with them, when they know they only want to get into their pants - and the person getting tricked is led to believe there will be a big relationship, etc. Remember, this question is all in fun and mostly because I just felt like seeing what people would say. It's Monday of Labor day, why not?? So, if you have ever done this - why did you do it and how did you feel when you did it? I understand the comments above about, 'hey! it's mutual,' or whatever. But often times it is not, and someone is getting their feelings hurt. Is the 'getting feelings hurt,' part also part of the chase? There is no right or wrong answers, I was just fishing for an interesting conversation/thread. Link to comment
sparkles4 Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 That's like asking "Why would you eat this delicious steak?" or "Would you be happy if you win the lottery?" Some people are just more carnally-minded than others. I don't think anyone should mislead someone just to get laid, but if everyone's on the same page, who cares? Word. Sex is enjoyable, and as long as you're not hurting anyone in the process, why not go for it if it's available? Link to comment
sparkles4 Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 How about this then, why do some men (people) try and TRICK others into having sex with them, when they know they only want to get into their pants - and the person getting tricked is led to believe there will be a big relationship, etc. . Probably because that's the only way into their pants. Link to comment
bebeblondie Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 I'm not a man, but I'll chime in and say that if a woman gives her consent to sex that soon, she has no right to later complain, if he "bails." Especially when there is no talk of being exclusive, or being in a commited relationship. Agreed. If I do this I usually make the decision prior to sleeping with him that if this guy bails on me I'll be ok with it. Then again I'm a woman who is able to have sex without emotionally getting involved. Link to comment
Lonewing Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 We want easy sex because it FEELS GOOD!!! and if it's easy without all that BS that we have to go through normally...well, come on now, do we buy the shirt for $59.99 or the exact same shirt for $4.99??? It's one reason people flock to relationships - instead of having to go to the market every day to buy a new jug, there's an exclusive source at home! BUT it comes with a cost - yes, daily maintainance. AND THEN they might break up, which is a huge trunk of hurt rejection baggage to contend with. So you see...why do men like easy sex? Well, gee, why do men like ridiculous trucks, ridiculous engines, and ridiculous sports??? Link to comment
HighRoad Posted September 7, 2009 Author Share Posted September 7, 2009 But what if it meant you would have to hurt someone in the process of getting this nice, pleasurable experience? Most people won't just give it up without some kind of dishonesty - do people really give it up so casually? Link to comment
Lonewing Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 That's why I don't so it - yet. I'm still sensitive to emotions, and likely to get attached myself. So I can't do that, yet. Just let a couple more women trounce all over me, and I think I'll be ready to join the crowd. Link to comment
HeartGoesOn Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 Hmmmm ... interesting comments! thanks everybody so far. How about this then, why do some men (people) try and TRICK others into having sex with them, when they know they only want to get into their pants - and the person getting tricked is led to believe there will be a big relationship, etc. Remember, this question is all in fun and mostly because I just felt like seeing what people would say. It's Monday of Labor day, why not?? They can only "trick" you if you allow it. The best way to avoid that is to use common sense, and realize that it takes time, and time getting to know someone well enough, to determine if you both have potential for a serious relationship. Link to comment
HighRoad Posted September 7, 2009 Author Share Posted September 7, 2009 Interesting comments from women, but I still think alot of men are not comfortable with the one night stand thing; it's weird getting naked with someone you don't know and who doesn't even have your best interest at heart. I think that many men feel the same as women - it feels too vulnerable and weird. So it is interesting that women have been commenting here that it is ok; I think that there is alot of deception and dishonesty when this happens and that part of the situation is that hurtfulness - and I propose that part of having 'casual sex' is an unconscious way to maybe get back at the other sex. Any takers? Remember, just a conversation in fun for the holiday weekend, but maybe too we can find some truth in here. Link to comment
Maverick32x Posted September 8, 2009 Share Posted September 8, 2009 I'm a man.. and I've fallen into this a couple times... its not my "nature" I guess... but to be totally honest, I will do this if a girl is "sorta" cute, and good enough to be in bed with... but I don't see it going much further than that.... If I just meet you, and we bang... its HIGHLY likely that there is absolutely no future between us... I need to have some sort of dating.. or "build up" to intimacy.. and that extends further then dinner and a couple drinks~ Link to comment
ScorpiGal83 Posted September 8, 2009 Share Posted September 8, 2009 *sigh* I'm not against it but I don't like it if there is deception involved. We're all adults, if you just want sex, say so, and we can at least know what is going on... ...rather than being led to believe it is going somewhere, i.e. a relationship, especially after several dates, long talks, and cuddling sessions. Link to comment
Macleod Posted September 8, 2009 Share Posted September 8, 2009 Why? Because we are biological f**k machines. Our purpose is to plant our seed into as many women as possible. Now since many of us have evolved, more may be attained, but when you get right down to it, my above statement says it all. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted September 8, 2009 Share Posted September 8, 2009 sometimes it might get confusing for the girl though. sure, most guys want to get some. but if they take you out and they get some from you, it doesn't mean they were just trying to get some all the time. maybe they really liked you but you just didn't turn out to be compatible enough to continue. but, you hooked up with him. should he feel used? no, sex is a natural part of humans. we all do it, we all contribute. guys just know how to disassociate sex with emotion more than women do. Link to comment
Lonewing Posted September 8, 2009 Share Posted September 8, 2009 sometimes it might get confusing for the girl though. sure, most guys want to get some. but if they take you out and they get some from you, it doesn't mean they were just trying to get some all the time. maybe they really liked you but you just didn't turn out to be compatible enough to continue. but, you hooked up with him. should he feel used? no, sex is a natural part of humans. we all do it, we all contribute. guys just know how to disassociate sex with emotion more than women do. I'm more kin to suggest that this is a conditioned response and the result of practice and continual ecnouragement by the surrounding culture. If men were encouraged to be more focused on finding a girl and sticking with her, then I do think you would see a different behavior within the population. It's possible highly correlated to money and power, who holds it and who wants it. How many Male Brothal houses do you see, afterall? Link to comment
ghost69 Posted September 8, 2009 Share Posted September 8, 2009 I'm more kin to suggest that this is a conditioned response and the result of practice and continual ecnouragement by the surrounding culture. If men were encouraged to be more focused on finding a girl and sticking with her, then I do think you would see a different behavior within the population. It's possible highly correlated to money and power, who holds it and who wants it. How many Male Brothal houses do you see, afterall? i beg to differ. i don't see it as a cultural norm, i think it's how men are physically wired. so many cultures, even ones that are not connected to modern society work in this fashion. sure you can encourage more guys to stay with girls for other reasons and increase that bond more, but if you aren't compatible with someone, you just aren't. sure there are the guys that just go out and hook up with whoever, i used to be one. but do i use girls now? no. but because i have sex with a girl doesn't mean i owe her a relationship. we are physical beings and we have physical needs just as much as emotional. male brothels? never happen. why? women ultimately hold the key to gettin some. it is science that guys need physical more than females. Link to comment
Lonewing Posted September 8, 2009 Share Posted September 8, 2009 Everything about your viewpoint is rooted in a window of relativity to the society within which you have been anchored. There have been communities throughout the ages where sex was not a huge issue - or where it was simply not done at all, such as the Shaker colony. All of this tells me is that our response and attitude about sex is formed by the education we receive in the 10 years before we ever start having sex. We live in a playboy society - that is our cultural 'norm.' Link to comment
ghost69 Posted September 8, 2009 Share Posted September 8, 2009 you are also talking about societies before 1900s. Link to comment
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