Nature Posted September 4, 2009 Share Posted September 4, 2009 I am sure there are a lot of people outhere who can say the same.... Speak up if you have never cheated on someone, and genuenly believe that you never will- not because you are in love, or married to that person, but because you have self-respect. I also know deep down I will never cheat on anyone....! BUT who knows what might happen tomorrow. Some people might not be able to understand this view. Put simply, I think cheats are the ones with issues, and not those who have been cheated at. However, this is only my personal opinion. In my life, I have always done what is 'right' what felt right, -no matter what!! I would like to think that this is a brave and courageous way to be? Would you agree? I think we should all try to treat people in the way we would like to be treated. You get what you give. Link to comment
Stella Sleepwalks Posted September 4, 2009 Share Posted September 4, 2009 I hand on heart believe I wouldn't cheat. Link to comment
Ivory_Tower Posted September 4, 2009 Share Posted September 4, 2009 Never cheated. I haven't even come close. Its been done to me once, and its the worst feeling in the world. You feel so stupid. Link to comment
dangletsbang Posted September 4, 2009 Share Posted September 4, 2009 I always said I would never cheat..because I knew how bad it hurt..I swore on everything I never would do that to someone else. but about a year ago..I did. it not only hurt the person I was with..but I hurt myself as well. I can honestly say i've learned from my mistake. Link to comment
Lonewing Posted September 4, 2009 Share Posted September 4, 2009 Nope, never done it. Slept with only one girl to. Never going to do it. It's a painful world already, why make it worse? Link to comment
FortunateOne Posted September 4, 2009 Share Posted September 4, 2009 You can add me to the "never have cheated or will cheat" list; though, I am a victim of cheaters, thrice in my life thus far. Link to comment
SapphireNoir10 Posted September 4, 2009 Share Posted September 4, 2009 Never have cheated. Never will. Im one for the 'treat others as you would like to be treated' kinda thing. Link to comment
Kantriakhor Posted September 4, 2009 Share Posted September 4, 2009 Only people weak or corrupt in spirit cheat, I am neither. Link to comment
Nature Posted September 4, 2009 Author Share Posted September 4, 2009 Guys you are all great! So pleased to hear there are still some nice and considerate people around.... Link to comment
AnonymousJohn Posted September 5, 2009 Share Posted September 5, 2009 Never have, never will, twice a victim though. Link to comment
arcadefire Posted September 5, 2009 Share Posted September 5, 2009 My last ex was cheating on me. Thought it will never happen to me. But never say never. I swear that I will never cheat. Never had. Never will. It's disgusting and immoral. Link to comment
Quenny Posted September 5, 2009 Share Posted September 5, 2009 I'm proud to say that I have never cheated on someone. Physically or emotionally. I'm not saying it won't happen... BUT, I believe that I'm a stronger person than that. And that means more to me than doing anything like that. Link to comment
smarternow Posted September 5, 2009 Share Posted September 5, 2009 I can also proudly say i have never cheated on anyone. I have been cheated on once, and dated a guy who i later found out was married, and dumped him immediately after i found out, I also informed his wife, but i have never cheated in any way. I'm proud to say that. The guy i dated who was married and lied about it had cheated on his wife before, when i told her what he did, she filed for divorce, good for her. Me and his wife are now really good friends. Link to comment
servedcold Posted September 6, 2009 Share Posted September 6, 2009 Never cheated, never will. Once you get comfortable being alone in life, it becomes easy to terminate a relationship that isn't working rather than trying to start up a new one while the old one dies. Link to comment
Nature Posted September 6, 2009 Author Share Posted September 6, 2009 I can also proudly say i have never cheated on anyone. I have been cheated on once, and dated a guy who i later found out was married, and dumped him immediately after i found out, I also informed his wife, but i have never cheated in any way. I'm proud to say that. The guy i dated who was married and lied about it had cheated on his wife before, when i told her what he did, she filed for divorce, good for her. Me and his wife are now really good friends. Good one! It is true when they say "once a cheater always a cheater". This guy you talk about proved that... I think for guys it's different, they either have no morals and emotionally detach themselves, so sex is just sex, great for their ego to have more than one woman in their lives..( not all men are the same- I'd like to think that!) But then again you'll find there are some women prone to cheating as well. Ego problem? Not sure. Many people are not strong enough to face up to reality and face up to their feelings- Too much to lose???/ Possibly. Anyway, I am getting better from 'nearly' getting involved with a cheater, and from losing my happy ( or what I thought was happy) relationship because of it. Just walk out of it all- was the only answer. You did well. Link to comment
servedcold Posted September 6, 2009 Share Posted September 6, 2009 I think for guys it's different, they either have no morals and emotionally detach themselves, so sex is just sex, great for their ego to have more than one woman in their lives..( not all men are the same- I'd like to think that!) But then again you'll find there are some women prone to cheating as well. Ego problem? Not sure. Many people are not strong enough to face up to reality and face up to their feelings- Too much to lose???/ Possibly. Actually more men will fess up to cheating than women, most men know they are doing wrong and will admit that they did wrong and suffer the consequences relatively easily. Women, OTOH, are the king rationalizers who will shift blame to their SO, their past, etc., and assemble a sympathetic support group that will go along with any of their rationalizations no matter how outlandish, lie fluidly even, to further their agenda of remaining blameless. You can see this principle at play in all the cliche reasons why people cheat. Men supposedly cheat because they can't help it or are flawed in some way, women OTOH, cheat because something is -missing- in their relationship. See the subtle difference here? Men are flawed, but women are victims of flawed relationships. Men do wrong because of their bad nature, women do wrong because some other source -forced- them into it. Convenient. Whatever was the case in the past, women and men cheat for exactly the same reasons, with the same motivations, and are subject to the same blame. All the double standards and BS about why the sexes cheat needs to go away, and the incidence of female cheating is as high if not slightly higher than male cheating. There really is no difference currently in why or how the sexes cheat. All cheaters should be treated and conceived of equally, male or female. To be fair, this also applies to the cliches that men are somehow fated to cheat because they are wired to spread seed... hogwash. Link to comment
arcadefire Posted September 6, 2009 Share Posted September 6, 2009 I wouldn't go so far as to say there are more women cheaters than men. And that more men fess up than women. You have no evidence to prove that. I can assure that the collective evidence on this forum alone can say otherwise. And that is wholly off topic. Link to comment
Lonewing Posted September 6, 2009 Share Posted September 6, 2009 Riiiiiggght On!!! My woman is a prime example...everything completely rationalized, not thought that it could be cheating...or what could be cheating, because she did the emotional cheating thing too! Link to comment
arcadefire Posted September 6, 2009 Share Posted September 6, 2009 My last ex-bf who cheated on me did not fess up. Did not think he was flawed. Tried to rationalize or justify his reasons. I don't see how he fits into that stereotype at all. Link to comment
Lonewing Posted September 6, 2009 Share Posted September 6, 2009 My last ex-bf who cheated on me did not fess up. Did not think he was flawed. Tried to rationalize or justify his reasons. I don't see how he fits into that stereotype at all. He's Feministic. It's very possible for men to have a more female personality, as it is for women to have a male personality. Me personally, I have a very traditional woman mindset...terrible, I know, I'm a modern man! Link to comment
Trodge Posted September 6, 2009 Share Posted September 6, 2009 What is the point in this thread? Ganging together and then looking down on people who have cheated is just so wrong. Good people cheat, because the situation isn't always black and white. Granted it's emotional weakness that leads to cheating, but since when did weak and cruel go hand in hand? Good people can be weak. Smokers, drug addicts, alcoholics. I know weak willed people who are good people. There are heartless selfish people out there, but cheaters aren't always bad people. Link to comment
greywolf Posted September 6, 2009 Share Posted September 6, 2009 I find this thread a little disturbing. Is it really right to look down on people who have flaws just like you do? Have you always been perfect in a relationship? Link to comment
sunshine1 Posted September 6, 2009 Share Posted September 6, 2009 I find this thread a little disturbing. Is it really right to look down on people who have flaws just like you do? Have you always been perfect in a relationship? I don't think it was meant to "look down" on others. Just celebrate the fact that they have been true to their word and committed in a relationship. The thread wasn't: who has never cheated? OTHERS ARE BAD. It was if you havent cheated.. commend yourself because that is a good thing. I feel like too many people try to find the NEGATIVE in something positive. Link to comment
servedcold Posted September 6, 2009 Share Posted September 6, 2009 Ganging together and then looking down on people who have cheated is just so wrong. Good people cheat, because the situation isn't always black and white. Lots of people in this thread have been cheated on, some several times in life, and this is their way of feeling good about themselves and coping with what was done to them. A pretty legitimate reason for such a thread. If you don't like it, don't read it. Link to comment
Kantriakhor Posted September 6, 2009 Share Posted September 6, 2009 I find this thread a little disturbing. Is it really right to look down on people who have flaws just like you do? Have you always been perfect in a relationship? Perfect in the sense of what this sub-forum is about (infidelity) yes Link to comment
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