When is the right time to contact her?

[alonealone]

So my last contact with my ex, she ended the relationship, was about 2 weeks ago. Email. Haven't seen her in over a month. She seemed somewhat irritated and mad about the breakup, don't know why, she dumped me. I tried to end it on a good note saying I hope we can still be friends and call me sometime if she wanted.

 

Anyway I been doing the no-contact thing. But now I have a strictly non-relationship question to ask her. So I want to use this question (email) to possibly be a way to get the ball rolling. My real question for you all is when to do it. I was thinking after 3 weeks of no contact. But I am starting to get impatient and wondering if 2 weeks is enough for something this simple. The info I need from her is nothing urgent so it could wait a month if need be.

 

Really I'm going to email her whether it helps my chances of her talking to me or not because I need this info. But I want to utilize it as a way to possibly get her talking to me again.

 

What do you all think? Hold off longer or try to get the ball moving?

[Sn0man]

You've already broken the no contact rule by sending an email. The longer you hold off on the communication, the easier it'll be to talk about things later on, when things are clearer.

 

The purpose of no contact is to give yourself time to work things out and to get over the strong emotions associated with a breakup. It also gives you time to reflect on what went wrong and how it could either have been avoided or how it can be resolved later on.

 

You might want to hold off on contact for a while longer. No one can really say just how long that is, but you'll know when the time comes, because the breakup won't be as hard to deal with anymore and you will have accepted what happened. Then you will be in a much better position to communicate with your ex, as will she.

 

Sn0man

[alonealone]

Well my last email to her was in reply to our official breakup about 2 weeks ago. We were on a break for the month I have not seen her, not officially broken up. So as of our breakup I have not contacted her.

[Heather300]

I just broke the NO Contact Rule by sending my exboyfriend an email... I am having a Colposcopy tommrow morning for possible Cervical Cancer and I don't want him to hear this from someone else... I went 3 weeks with no contact, he contacted me by calling my cell phone... The reason why we broke up is because I found his profile on a adult website and he got mad that I found out and broke up with me, we were together for 2 years... But wouldn't you want to know if your exboyfriend/exgirlfriend was sick??? Was I wrong for telling him???

[kate111]

Well I personally think you should call her right away and get whatever you wanted back.

 

You are using this as an excuse to make contact in the future sometime.

 

You need to let go. This is just preventing you from moving on.

 

After you have sorted this out then you can rest and wait for her to call you. If she doesn't then you can think about whether you want to apply no contact or not. (i, personally see problems with this approach)

 

Id probably just try to be nice (not angry or sad) and be a good sport. Then you will win her respect at least.