How do I get over him???

[jayne]

I am a 29 year old professional female. My boyfriend of 2 years, who I thought for sure was "the one" for me, broke up with me a year ago. I still think about him every day and still find myself driving by his work and home, even though I am trying to move on and date other people. He has moved on and is getting married this summer. So...

 

#1 How do I get over him??

 

#2 Will I ever met anyone who I loved as much??

 

Thank you for helping me!

 

Jayne

[Redneck]

you sound like me i broke up with my ex about 8 months ago and i am having a hard time trying to get over her. keep yourself occupied with something and try to stay away from him cause it is going to bring up old feelings, and find a new boyfriend that will help you forget about your ex.

 

 

 

andy

[luxe_13]

Same here! It's been 6 mths for me and I still think about my ex every day no fail. Even if it's just for a minute. He is still the las thing i think of before i go to bed.

 

Jayne...he is getting married....so i guess you have to forget about being with him...but you've probably already figured that

 

If it's too hard to be friends with him..then i think you should stay clear of him and his partner and immerse yourself in something else you love.

 

Maybe it's time to travel?

 

I'm sure you will find someone really special soon..who will think you're a goddess! don't worry about that! No doubt you wil find someone..

[cyankino]

dont loose hope. Its been over a year and you still think about him? you must have had it bad for him. but i know what you are going through. my take on having someone break up with you is this;

 

you have to want to let them go. you have to tell yourself that you must move on and not have their abcense take over your life. you have to accept the fact that they no longer want you in their lives in that way. its not easy sometimes. but its reality. you have to accept it and move on and get on with your life.

 

open yourself up, there are millions of people out there to meet, don't drag yourself down thinking about just ONE. One that has not only moved on away from you but moved on with someone else.

 

Good luck,

 

Kino

[Celadon]

Hi Jayne,

 

Thanks for posting. I think a lot of us have been where you are. In some ways, I'm not much farther down the path than you. But I do feel pretty happy about my life and not TOO hung up on the guy anymore (only sometimes...). To answer your questions:

 

#1. You get over him by cutting the useless old ties. Like, I wouldn't drive past his home or workplace. That's useless, you know what I mean? It's not a meaningful part of any relationship; it's just hanging on. I intentionally drive a different route so I avoid my ex's place.

 

You get yourself out there and meet new people or see new things. Anything to create a new life that has wonderful experiences that DON'T include memories of the ex. I like the suggestion of traveling on a previous post. Nothing like being somewhere else to feel like you're living a new life, not hanging on to the old one! Maybe volunteer somewhere, like a soup kitchen or nursing home, so you get your mind off your life and onto someone else's -- someone who just appreciates your help.

 

BTW, I actually think it's okay to be friends with the ex, so long as you're putting it in proper perspective. Enjoy the friendship and how well you know one another, but don't pine for him or think of him in the old way anymore.

 

#2 Will you ever meet anyone who you will love as much? Yes. You will. I don't believe there's only one soulmate. There are many wonderful potential mates who are wonderful in different ways. You're used to one way, and you've had the opportunity to know what it is to love and be in love. That's a good thing. Now, you can look for someone who is ready to cherish you. He will not be just like your ex, but he will be great.

 

The best thing to do is keep your hope up and look at your life positively. Positive vibes are very attractive. Take care.

[lovetasticloo]

jayne,im really feeling 4u,im going thru the same thing myself,no1 can tell u how long ths will take,but knw ths..woteva the circumstances of ur split,whoeva ended it,u r a good and loving person.even tho u probably dnt even WANT any1 else rite nw,u deserve and WILL meet sum jst as special as u,and make each other very happy.ur holding on 2 hope that maybe sumday u will get bk 2gether?uve got 2 let ths go my darling,it will keep u in its grip 4 years 2 come,and u cld unintentionally spoil any chances of being happy with any1 else.i always find that as much as we love them,and no matter how absolutely heart wrenching it is 2 accept,its over.uve got 1 life hunny,and the whole world is missing out on ur smile.its time 2 start picking up those pieces and rebuilding ur heart&life,the benefits will be so worth it,1 tiny step at a time.its ok 2 cry,its ok 2 feel bad,but we cnt let ourselves get caught in the neverending circle of misery.u sound far 2 lovely 4 that.jst remember the good times u had with fondness,and think that its better 2 have known that feeling of pure love than 2 have gone thru life perhaps having never felt it?i truly wish u well jayne.xxx