THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE, Part 2

[anon12]

Day 4, things startin to pick up!

[w1sh03]

it has been 2 months and 3 days of no contact. i gota say i am healing quite quickly and i am proud of the progress i made. we have been broken up for about 3 months and im glad i went nc. because if not it would have taken me quite awhile to forget bout her.

[bitebenot]

it has been 2 months and 3 days of no contact. i gota say i am healing quite quickly and i am proud of the progress i made. we have been broken up for about 3 months and im glad i went nc. because if not it would have taken me quite awhile to forget bout her.

 

Very good,keep it going.You will be out of this crap shortly.You're a winner !!!!

[klafeoj]

Day 5. When does that slighly hollow feeling start to go away?

[bitebenot]

Day 5. When does that slighly hollow feeling start to go away?

 

Different from one to another but you should be better at 2 to 3 months.The faster you move on the faster you will heal.

Time heals all wounds...but you cant rush it ! But pain is good in life.

It does teach us a good lesson and we become a better person.

But me when i will start a new relationship,i will be on my guard full time.

I wont give myself fully anymore.She will get half of my heart..the other half will be my security blanket ! Of course she wont know that but i will.

[1guygirl]

day whatever............fink erm...16 or 17

 

who gives a (best not say, case i get ANOTHER INFRACTION)

 

gawd i miss free speech hhaha

 

lifes been ok part from getting snowed in...

 

had cpl of dreams bout him but not him...they have been played with diff actors shall we say....very telling anyways...

 

alls good

 

stay strong peeps....

[bitebenot]

day whatever............fink erm...16 or 17

 

who gives a (best not say, case i get ANOTHER INFRACTION)

 

gawd i miss free speech hhaha

 

lifes been ok part from getting snowed in...

 

had cpl of dreams bout him but not him...they have been played with diff actors shall we say....very telling anyways...

 

alls good

 

stay strong peeps....

 

You're doing great ! It shows to your ex that you can be ok without him !

Keep up the good work that you started and you be rewarded,you'll see !

We dont know what the future holds for us,but we can surely be prepared for it ! A car can be stolen and be replaced,same goes for our ex !

Love can be wonderful or really awful !

[Elephant]

Day 5

 

I figure I'd chime in. Last time we were in contact was through e-mail on Jan. 4th (it was his birthday). I wasn't going to write him, but he wrote me two weeks earlier on mine, so it seemed like the polite thing to do.

 

I went on his Facebook page on Thursday though, which resulted in tears, so we'll say that's the day NC started for me.

 

I miss him a lot. I think I'm more sad over the idea that he is moving on; it hurts. Still, I've come a long way in 1.5 months! I was seeing a therapist and she couldn't believe how well I was doing and said we could officially stop having regular appointments, so that has been reassuring. I still think about him all the time, but I'm a lot calmer about things. Hopefully this keeps up.

[klafeoj]

Day 6... weeee almost a week. I'm just looking forward to the day when i don't want her back... or she actaully does come back... either way it's something to look forward too.

[anon12]

Day 6 aswell! going out tonight, hopefully ill bump into this girl ive been talking to recently!

[syxx87]

Day 8

 

I've actually been in good spirits here for the past day or two. My ex tried to chat with me on facebook on Sunday but I ignored it. I think she was trying to bait me by saying "I know you dont wanna really wanna talk and if you dont reply I understand". I still want her back but I am slowly (I emphasize the word "slowly") feeling, I guess indifferent about it. I cant wait to see how I will feel by the end of January.

[bitebenot]

Day 8

 

I've actually been in good spirits here for the past day or two. My ex tried to chat with me on facebook on Sunday but I ignored it. I think she was trying to bait me by saying "I know you dont wanna really wanna talk and if you dont reply I understand". I still want her back but I am slowly (I emphasize the word "slowly") feeling, I guess indifferent about it. I cant wait to see how I will feel by the end of January.

 

Excellent ! Now you got it right ! Dont give up,she will keep on trying.

Keep her on a clothesline to dry up well ! Play it right and she might crawl back ! She has to ask for reconciliation or keep ignoring her totaly,i know you can do it !

[bitebenot]

Day 6 aswell! going out tonight, hopefully ill bump into this girl ive been talking to recently!

 

Very good but take it slowly if it works ! Dont be a rebounder.

[syxx87]

Excellent ! Now you got it right ! Dont give up,she will keep on trying.

Keep her on a clothesline to dry up well ! Play it right and she might crawl back ! She has to ask for reconciliation or keep ignoring her totaly,i know you can do it !

 

Thanks for the words of encouragement bitebenot! Each day that I go without interacting with her, I feel just a little stronger. Something that I've been struggling with though is that I've been having dreams about her the past few nights. Last night I had a dream that I found out that she had sex with her boss which made me wake up right away soaked in sweat. Then two nights before I had a dream that me and her were holding each other then started kissing, then almost started having sex then she stopped me and started crying telling me that she cant which made me start crying then I woke up. I dont know if this is part of the healing process but it definitely is frustrating to say the least.

[hopelessincan]

Day 0. Made it two weeks exactly. Ah well, was fun while it lasted. NOT

Now im going the opposite way. LC or more than that. Talked to him today and yesterday briefly via email and text. will be seeing him tomorrow, and all weekend.

Time for some more torture.

Torture to see him and torture not to ..... so hey what can you do?

[bitebenot]

Thanks for the words of encouragement bitebenot! Each day that I go without interacting with her, I feel just a little stronger. Something that I've been struggling with though is that I've been having dreams about her the past few nights. Last night I had a dream that I found out that she had sex with her boss which made me wake up right away soaked in sweat. Then two nights before I had a dream that me and her were holding each other then started kissing, then almost started having sex then she stopped me and started crying telling me that she cant which made me start crying then I woke up. I dont know if this is part of the healing process but it definitely is frustrating to say the least.

 

It is for all of us.I did dream of her,just the fact of seeing her in a dream was enough to make me sad in the morning.Our strong emotional state of mind will do this but lesser with time.Even if you refuse to heal,it will win over you ! Time only will settle those feelings.Its awful because you cant rush it !

For me its a litle over 3 months and its a lot better than 1 month.

If you want to heal faster,find another girl even if its only friendship.

Your pain will disappear a lot faster.

Best way to get over someone its to get under someone,lol

[bitebenot]

Day 5

 

I figure I'd chime in. Last time we were in contact was through e-mail on Jan. 4th (it was his birthday). I wasn't going to write him, but he wrote me two weeks earlier on mine, so it seemed like the polite thing to do.

 

I went on his Facebook page on Thursday though, which resulted in tears, so we'll say that's the day NC started for me.

 

I miss him a lot. I think I'm more sad over the idea that he is moving on; it hurts. Still, I've come a long way in 1.5 months! I was seeing a therapist and she couldn't believe how well I was doing and said we could officially stop having regular appointments, so that has been reassuring. I still think about him all the time, but I'm a lot calmer about things. Hopefully this keeps up.

 

Its all up to you,it will be hard for a while but you will pull trough it.

Try very hard to not see anything related to him.Remove anything that reminds you of him.Dont go to places that you use to go with him.

And the famous PC,msn..my space,fb and all,dump him from it,you must !

Put all your hopes away, or you will suffer longer and deeper.The trick its to do all you can to forget him and move on no matter what ! Fantasize about what your new b/f will be like,write it down ! Pamper yourself ! Flowers,bubble bath and candles...YOU ARE MORE IMPORTANT than him !

Foremost,dont be alone longer then you have to ! I know you dont feel like it,but once you are with friends, it changes ! Good luck to you.

[bitebenot]

Day 8

 

I've actually been in good spirits here for the past day or two. My ex tried to chat with me on facebook on Sunday but I ignored it. I think she was trying to bait me by saying "I know you dont wanna really wanna talk and if you dont reply I understand". I still want her back but I am slowly (I emphasize the word "slowly") feeling, I guess indifferent about it. I cant wait to see how I will feel by the end of January.

 

You're only 22 years old..better to learn this lesson now instead of later !

Since we all end up in those type of situations,it will help you to prevent this from happening again, or to be able to manage it a lot better ! You will become a master of NC at age 22 ! I wished i had that chance ! I have learned all this a bit to late, but still gave me a lot to obtain control over my life ! And you will be able to help others with your skills ! It will serve you for a lifetime ! Its great isnt it ? A negative that turns positive !

And thats good for anyone here at ENA.

[syxx87]

You're only 22 years old..better to learn this lesson now instead of later !

Since we all end up in those type of situations,it will help you to prevent this from happening again, or to be able to manage it a lot better ! You will become a master of NC at age 22 ! I wished i had that chance ! I have learned all this a bit to late, but still gave me a lot to obtain control over my life ! And you will be able to help others with your skills ! It will serve you for a lifetime ! Its great isnt it ? A negative that turns positive !

And thats good for anyone here at ENA.

 

Well I guess I'm still not completely in control of my emotions yet because just a few hours ago, I was reading another thread (cant remember which one it was, one of those threads challenging against NC) which made me start going a little crazy for a bit wondering if my ex still loved me, missed me, and if she would really come back and if so, when. It lasted for about 30 minutes or so but was definitely deflating to go in a small rut like that.

[CuZiNeeDYoU]

Day 70

wow i never thought i would reach day 70 without hearing from her. Just goes to show you, its better to expect the worst!

[bitebenot]

Well I guess I'm still not completely in control of my emotions yet because just a few hours ago, I was reading another thread (cant remember which one it was, one of those threads challenging against NC) which made me start going a little crazy for a bit wondering if my ex still loved me, missed me, and if she would really come back and if so, when. It lasted for about 30 minutes or so but was definitely deflating to go in a small rut like that.

 

If she loves you she will be back..if not, that means it wasnt meant to be.

Thats why NC is good,also very good for you.

Right now shes thinking about you,im sure of that otherwise she wouldnt email you at all ! Give her the time to miss you..let nostalgia kick in and see.

No garantees, but i dont see a better solution,really !

If you're in touch with her,she wont miss you and she would drop you soon after.So,hang on tight and MOVE ON ! Dont hope for anything or pain will be long term,i know that and many others here ! NC lets her know you can survive whitout her,it will make her think ! Its your last chance,dont blow it !

[bitebenot]

Day 70

wow i never thought i would reach day 70 without hearing from her. Just goes to show you, its better to expect the worst!

 

Day 99 for me...was thinking the same ! But shes dating another from day 1.

My hopes are gone.. .i aint waiting,shes a goner ! Thats why its better to move on as soon as possible.Dumpers can communicate later on,like even a year ! lol.Would i have a surprise for her ! I would just tell her to f*** off.lol

That women was jealous,clingy and in love like crazy for me !

That didnt stop her from dumping me and turning into a monster from hell.

[syxx87]

If she loves you she will be back..if not, that means it wasnt meant to be.

Thats why NC is good,also very good for you.

Right now shes thinking about you,im sure of that otherwise she wouldnt email you at all ! Give her the time to miss you..let nostalgia kick in and see.

No garantees, but i dont see a better solution,really !

If you're in touch with her,she wont miss you and she would drop you soon after.So,hang on tight and MOVE ON ! Dont hope for anything or pain will be long term,i know that and many others here ! NC lets her know you can survive whitout her,it will make her think ! Its your last chance,dont blow it !

 

Bitebenot, you're literally giving me daily hope and strength to keep moving forward and I thank you for that. God bless you! Its sucks because my emotions still change rapidly. One portion of the day, I will feel confident that she will come back and I just need to be patient and occupy my time with other people and other things, then the smallest thing will make me go in a funk and think that she is gone for good and never coming back for the other portion of the day. I know I should have the mindset that she is gone for good so that I dont have false hope and can heal quicker but, I still love this girl so much and just want her back. We had a great relationship and just had communication issues.

 

I'm doing NC because her mixed signals and casual mentions of her boss were driving me crazy and setting me back so I needed it to heal but I do hope that this period of NC will give her time to decide what it is that she really wants (hopefully me again since she says that she is confused and doesnt know what she wants.

[bitebenot]

We are here to help each other..we share the same pain and some hopes.

But what i have learned since that fatidic day is that IM MORE IMPORTANT THAN HER ! I forgot about myself in the name of love ! Shame on me for crying like a sissy and begging to her ! How sick ! My pride took a beating !

Took me 3 f*** months to get where i am ! I just want others to bypass that

and be free of pain as soon as possible ! When i read about what people feel,i literally feel their pain and feel bad for them ! No one should suffer that much,aint fair ! Love is not about pain.Others use love to inflict negative feelings on their ex ! One thing is sure,their is more good people than bad ones ! Logically, when someone drops you,you do the same by ignoring them !

At that time when its applied,the dumper and the dumpee are on equal ground.Why chase someone who kicked your a$$ ? You go NC and let stew over their decision.Amen

[bitebenot]

After a breakup,mood swings are there to stick around..still have a few after 3months but are acceptable.That roller coaster ride is hard to control,when it happens,i shift my thinking immediately to something else.

I see a big yellow ballon with a black X in the middle,thats means im not allowed too think about that person or subject ! May appear strange to you,but it works for me mostly when im going to bed ! I usually think of a former love and the good times whe had or a good vacation..then im asleep !

Yes,feelings of love and attachments for the ex are hard to deal with, but can be controled. Thats why you have to give up all hopes to get them back and move on and start to love ourselves before we start loving another being.

Then the healing is almost complete.