Should I talk to him or not

[jgal86]

I need some advice on talking to the ex after not for 5 months. I just wanted some opinions. I know some people say don't do it b/c they're an ex for a reason but other people say do it that it won't hurt. I'm not doing it hoping to get back together, I mean that would be nice later down the road if it did happen but not planning on it, I just want us to be able to talk and be friends again. It wasn't a messy break up or anything (I know that's an important detail) anyway just wanted to get you guys and gals thoughts on it before I try to talk to him and do the wrong thing. Thanks!!!

[Batya33]

Do it if you would be very comfortable if the conversation was about the new cute girl he was dating who he saw potential with. Otherwise, don't.

[jgal86]

Do it if you would be very comfortable if the conversation was about the new cute girl he was dating who he saw potential with. Otherwise, don't.

 

I don't think that'd bother me i'm just worried mostly of how to approach it, I sent him a message the other day and honestly didn't expect a reply but got one so I wasn't sure if I should send him another one to try to reestablish communication or not. . .like I said some people say don't do it and some say do so I didn't know what to do

[wiley]

Like Batya33 said, if you're prepared and comfortable with hearing about a possible new relationship he's in, then yeah, go for it.

[D_Lish]

if you are able to be just his friend, without any expectation of getting back together and you can handle the fact that despite him replying once, he may not reply again, then I see no harm in it.

 

I don't think you have moved on....else you wouldn't feel a need to contact him. I think you are looking to test the waters and see where his head is at.

[CallingAllAngels]

I saw let sleeping dogs lie. You've moved on and he's moved on.

 

Leave it well enough alone. You don't know how HE feels about you, and while you don't want to get back with him, you may give him the wrong impression by contacting you.

[jgal86]

if you are able to be just his friend, without any expectation of getting back together and you can handle the fact that despite him replying once, he may not reply again, then I see no harm in it.

 

I don't think you have moved on....else you wouldn't feel a need to contact him. I think you are looking to test the waters and see where his head is at.

 

Maybe you're right maybe i haven't moved on, I thought i had and it had been long enough without talking to him but maybe so. Do you think he'd think the same way if i did contact him?

 

Good point, thanks for the advice everyone, keep it coming so i can wrap my head around this

[deang]

usually if you have to ask this question then it's a bad idea to contact them...you need to be sure about it or you risk setting yourself up. I accidently saw the ex's facebook when I did a facebook contact search..didn't realize I still had her as a contact but then I surprised myself in that there was a slight feeling there but nothing that I couldn't control or deal with. We've even exchanged email since then. She's just not a priority in my life right now and that's a great feeling compared to where I was 6-7 months ago. Take your time...there is no hurry. Sounds like you need a bit more space then you can do whatever you feel like. I actually saw that my ex was engaged on her myspace and was happy and sort of relieved for some reason. Ended up she wasn't just wanted guys to leave her alone haha but I was ok with it and though it would be interesting to see her it's not one of my top 10 things to do.