My girlfriend needs to orgasm!

[Love_Pengiun]

Alright, this is a serious question...my girlfriend can't orgasm. We've done everything really...finger, oral, and sex, but she doesn't really feel it. she says it feels good, but then it just fades, and i have to move to another spot...eventually i can come back to that spot. she likes everything, is there anyway/anything that could help her?

[rilo82]

my gf is too. she doesn't know what tis like to orgasm. she says it feels good. but thats abt it. are there any clues to know that she has orgased?

[Jurassicj]

a orgasm to a girl feels almost identical to a mans, muscles get intense around the mid section and contract and stuff and then they cum just like guys but usually not as thick and as much. Did you know when u had your first orgasm? yes and so would a girl, she would know

[adrenalyn-x]

What you can do to help is be very patient with her, help her relax, and try not to focus on the orgasm itself, but rather in the pleasure. Talk to each other during the sex, etc, and like you said, move on to something else if one place doesn't work. If it doesn't work, there is always next time. The most important thing is that you both enjoy yourselves.

 

Does she masturbate by herself? If she does that, at least the pressure is off both of you. She can relax and take all the time in the world, and practice in trying to have the orgasm without having to worry.

[Athena]

Does she masterbate? If so, and if you guys are really comfortable with each other, is have her masturbate to climax with you there. Watch what she does.

[bridey]

If she has not had one on her own, masterbation is key. She should lay under the bathtub faucet and let the hard water stimulate her clitoris! Otherwise a vibrator works well too, but she might be too embarrased to buy one at this point. Also, it takes time. I am a pro all alone, but I have a hard time with a new lover. I need to be very emotionally comfortable and feel a lot of trust for him before I can let go. I feel very vulnerable during an orgasm and it is not easy to share with another.

[Illhelp]

Athena,

 

Brava! Great insight. That will work on us every time and show us what you enjoy! We're a little bit intimidated to suggest things because women, in general, will never let us know exactly where and what. And we're convinced you all could never be as deviant (better word?)as we believe ourselves to be.

[CanadianGirl]

First off, I would like to say that every girl is different, and enjoy's different things...but I can offer some info for you, from what works for me.

 

Secondly, remember that she should at least have the experience of giving herself an orgasm, so she can understand what she wants. Ask her to to tell you how she likes it. Usually women can get a CLITORAL orgasm quite easily.....

 

Third there are 3 types of orgasms that women can get.....a clitoral orgasm, g-spot orgasm, epicentre orgasm....each takes time, patience, and mental as well as physical stimulation.

 

Granted, it is harder for a woman to orgasm than a man...it usually takes a longer time, and you probably should take things slowly, and not push her or pressure her to have one -- because if she is thinking that she HAS TO orgasm, she will be thinking of that instead of submitting to the pleasure (which is what she has to do).

 

Here are my suggestions:

 

1. I can't stress enough how important foreplay is. Take your time, build her up to a point where she is almost begging you to do the deed. Kiss, caress, gently feather your fingers on her neck, lower back, back of knees, inner thighs, etc...stay clear of the sexual organs for now....focus on other erogenous zones, and lightly tease her.

 

2. The clit is a good place to start oral. lick AROUND it, and work your way in circular motions to the centre (she may not like it directly on the centre) I suggest starting on the top, licking side to side, round and round, etc. Then you can start to suck/lick the outer labia, and work your way to the inside of her vagina -- then suck it....that is great!

 

3. Tease her some more. Stroke your organ against hers, but don't penitrate.....tease, and make her want it.....tell her how much she turns you on *be graphic, not vulgar-unless she likes dirty talk* but do let her know how beautiful and sexy she is to you....romance her mind, seduce her mind and make her get right into the mood....don't over do it.

 

4. Don't begin intercourse yet. Start with your fingers, one at a time. Slide your fingers inside of her palm UP, as far in as they can go -- then start wiggling them up and down *palm of your hand still facing upwards* almost like the motion you would give asking someone to come to you...fingers moving up and down....slowly at first, then faster....make sure she is enjoying it and not experiencing pain. It's a good idea to gently lick her clit as your fingers are wiggling up and down inside of her. You will feel a soft patch of spongy like material inside her...towards the top of her vagina -- usually found towards the top, front part inside of her....work this...this will almost always get her flowing....

 

5. Be prepared by putting a towel under her bottom, as a G-spot orgasm will GUSH female ejaculate...and it literally gushes from her. Once you get her flowing....you can enter her with your organ...

 

6. SLOWLY, penetrate her inch by inch --- take your time, and keep telling her how wonderful it is, how beautiful/sexy she is, how you love her and love seeing her in ecstasy....mental stimulation...don't forget it!!! She will probably not be able to hold back by this point, and may have multiple orgasms. Keep going slowly, and let her know it's all about her.

 

7. Remember, slow is the key. Give her the chance to fully enjoy every inch .. when she finishes her orgasm -- you can do it any way you need to get yours...slowly is the key. Mental stimulation and the build up to the act are VERY IMPORTANT TO WOMEN.

 

I hope this helps. I guaruntee that once she has her first orgasm, it will be that much easier for her to get another, and another. If she feels trust in you and comfort...and you don't put pressure on her --- she'll come around.

 

Men are visual creatures---visuals are turn ons. Women are mental creatures....being turned on mentally can do wonders....

[twelve]

or make her aware that you are finding it frustrating, the pressure will make it harder for her.

 

tell her that you masturbate and try it in front of her, and see if she willin front of you, and it wil take time.

thats the only way she may be able to and it does not mean there is anything you are doing wrong.

it is the way a lot of girls are =)

[The Captain]

be paitant.

i would try having normal sexual intercourse with you or her providing clitoral stimulation

[ChrisYellowV6Stang]

I haven't really read all the replies cuz im tired tonight, but you can try getting a couple things from adult stores, depending on how old you are. Try Chinese Nympho Cream....it makes her very sensetive down there. Also try nippilicious if her nipples are sensetive..does pretty much the same thing but to her nipples. My girlfriend loves them both. Hope it helps.