distant boy.. friend???

[smilingeyes]

i'm in college and i started seeing this one guy for about 2 months.. he told me that he didn't exactly go looking for a girlfriend but he would like being in a relationship with me. things were going okay, i mean i even gave up my virginity to him.. then he started only talking to me on the weekends and now i haven't talked to him in 2 weeks. what do you think his deal is? should i even make an effort to talk to him again? please advise!

[barbielovesmac]

have you tried contacting him at all?

[huskiesfan]

I would not try to contact him right now, but just let him be for the moment. Of course, Im not 100% sure, but it sounds like he could be doing some thinking right now about things. Best to let him be for now, I learned that the hard way.

[arwen]

Hey girl,

 

I'm afraid that he lost interest. Two weeks is a very long time not to speak in a two month relationship.

 

Are you in love with him? This is a painful experience (probably, I mean if he would contact you now I'd be cautious in assuming you're really in a relationship, he seems very uncommitted)- however, I think there is something useful that I guess a lot of us have to learn the hard way. That is that when persons tell you they are not really looking for a relationship, they are usually speaking the truth. It's a huge red flag, at least to me it is.

 

I have been in this place with a guy. He actually started to be really flaky with dates (he stood me up two times), didn't contact me etc. We didn't sleep together, but it hurt nonetheless. I first hung up on him after he canceled another date. Then I emailed him suggesting to talk, and we ended things openly. That was hard, because he was acting as if he had never been interested in me. But it gave me closure.

 

So if you think you'd at least get closure from talking, I'd maybe call him, say that you are no longer interested in dating him but that you'd like to know why he stopped contacting you. I know it's probably not what you want to do, but I think that if he REALLY wants you, he will let you know the moment you walk away. And even then I'd not run into his arms directly.

[smilingeyes]

thanks guys, yeah for now i'm going to let it sit. we weren't too serious, like i didn't love him, though i did like him a lot. if i see him i'll ask him kind of subtly but if not, then whatever. it's college i shouldn't let him get to me.

[qqqq]

im going through a smiliar thing. Does it bother you that you gave up your virginity to him and now he's acting like this?

 

I did that. thought this guy was great. now i barely see or speak to him. its making me ill. i dont know how to move past it.

[ghost69]

he might be busy with school.