sazzle15 Posted September 30, 2008 Share Posted September 30, 2008 My boyfriend of 4 months keeps dumping about every 5 or 6 days. He then sees me out, cries, says he loves me and wants me back. Each time I say stop doing this as its upsetting me. He says we dont get on but we do. The only thing we argue about is the fact he keeps dumping me. What would make someone do this? Is it control or insecurity? I have finally said no more and I wont take him back but to move on I feel I need to understand what would make you do that. Link to comment
Mutley Posted September 30, 2008 Share Posted September 30, 2008 He's nuts....just like my last girlfriend. She did the same thing. Good for you for being strong and getting out of that. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted September 30, 2008 Share Posted September 30, 2008 If it was me I would stay gone. He sounds very confused and he needs to find out what is causing his confusion, but in the mean time you do not need that. Link to comment
KG Posted September 30, 2008 Share Posted September 30, 2008 It sounds like either contolling behaviour, or he's confused with what he wants. Stay N/C for awhile, you don't need this drama in your life. Link to comment
Wotgorilla Posted September 30, 2008 Share Posted September 30, 2008 You deserve better than him, stay away! Link to comment
sazzle15 Posted September 30, 2008 Author Share Posted September 30, 2008 When we met I did not want to get serious as I had just lost my job and car and was starting a new business. He says he never got over that time. I explained it was not personal and after a few weeks I did not feel comfortable committing that soon to him. He says 4 months later it still upsets but I wasnt horrible I was happy to see him but not get too heavy. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted September 30, 2008 Share Posted September 30, 2008 Oh ok he wants you to feel bad because when you met him you were not in a good place. He is blaming you for HIS actions. He needs to grow up now and not take it personally. People have stuff happen in their lives BEFORE they meet people and that is just life. I would still stay gone until he becomes responsible for his bad behavoir. Link to comment
sazzle15 Posted September 30, 2008 Author Share Posted September 30, 2008 I really love him, not that he believes me. Each time we get back together he says oh you made me realise how much I love you now. In the past I have fallen into really bad habits of texting him and contacting him too much but its only because I was desperate to keep him. Sad of me I know. Its going to be hard we are both in the same circle of friends. Do you think people can change these types of habits? Link to comment
bijoux27 Posted September 30, 2008 Share Posted September 30, 2008 Yes it is definitely insecurity. He needs a life smack to get him back in line. Maybe if you two take time off he could stop this behaviour. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted September 30, 2008 Share Posted September 30, 2008 I really love him, not that he believes me. Each time we get back together he says oh you made me realise how much I love you now. In the past I have fallen into really bad habits of texting him and contacting him too much but its only because I was desperate to keep him. Sad of me I know. Its going to be hard we are both in the same circle of friends. Do you think people can change these types of habits? He HAS to WANT to. Not you or anyone else can make him. It is all up to him. Link to comment
Mutley Posted September 30, 2008 Share Posted September 30, 2008 I find it only gets worse with time....but, you never know. You may beat the odds. Link to comment
thedude27 Posted September 30, 2008 Share Posted September 30, 2008 Once they do get more secure(thanks to you) they tend to leave. Just stay gone it will be easier for you to do it now rather than later. Link to comment
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