EllyLamb86 Posted September 6, 2008 Share Posted September 6, 2008 I am 21 years old and engaged to the man I have been dating for over five years. We lived in separate towns up until last year when we got a place together. We've had ups and downs throughout our relationship but we generally get along fine. We still laugh and joke around together. We still go out and enjoy one-another s company. We argue occasionally but it is usually over petty things and is resolved shortly after our tempers have cooled. The problem I have is I feel like our passion is gone. I care deeply for him and I know he thinks the world of me but I don't feel the "need" to be with him past the simple need for physical contact to abate my loneliness. Our sex life has dwindled since we have moved in together, originally because he seemed to lack interest. Even with our mutual renewed efforts, we still do not have sex more then once or twice a month. I find myself thinking about other men, usually men I'm close to emotionally such as good friends. Even if I know they are not someone I am exceptionally attracted to nor someone I would like to start a relationship with. I find myself longing for something else and more then my relationship is giving and simply wish it would be acceptable by both society and my fiance if I was to explore my sexual interests a bit more. We've been together since I was a very young age and I hadn't done much in the way of dating before him. I have no intention of acting on these thoughts and I don't want to break off our relationship. I know if I break it now to "sow my wild oats" I am not going to get him back. I still love him very much and know I'm not likely to find someone who will treat me as well as he does. What should I do? Am I just being immature and selfish for wanting more? I've talked to him about seeing a counselor but he refuses. What should I do? Link to comment
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