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Move Forward? Or Stay Still?


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Cliffs Notes Are At The Bottom Of This Thread!




Summer 2007 I met a girl who was living in my area for study abroad purposes. I met her because I am part of a 'club' which introduces its members to language partners from other countries who are studying English. I majored in the language which she speaks when I was a college student, and I wanted to keep the language skills fresh. I've met tons of people thru this service over the years and I'm still friends with them up til now.


Anyway, we met on the campus of her school. When I saw her, my jaw literally dropped. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. She was just beautiful. At first, it was very sanitary. I helped her, she helped me. As the weeks went by, we started hanging out for fun instead of language studying. We had (and still have) very good chemistry. She returned to her country in January of this year. Two weeks later, I went to her country (for a convention, not just for her) and we hung out again. Before I went back to the states, she gave me a letter. The letter did not have anything revealing. She just said "And you better write back from America" then handed it to me. So From January until June of this year, we wrote to each other by snail mail. She said she doesn't like how impersonal email is.


At the end of June of this year, I moved to her country for work. Although I live kind of far from her (about 5 hours by car, 1.5 hours by express train), it is not difficult to go to her town. She didn't believe me at first when I told her I was moving to her country. She is extremely busy (she's a graduate student) and I am busy as well, so we didn't find time for each other. All we've been doing since I got here was texting each other. Finally this past weekend we both had time as it was a 4-day weekend due to a national holiday. It is a lot easier to take a train to where she is, but I decided to drive down there since I like taking road trips, even if I am alone.


She lives about 30 miles from the capital of her country, and it's really beautiful at night. We took a drive (the long way) to a place that is popular for dates (It wasn't planned, we just ended up there). This place is fairly large, so we spent the time walking around, checking out shops. She saw this glass sculpture at a store we passed and it was of two cartoon-style bears embracing. One big, one small. She pointed at the big one and said "That's you." then she pointed at the little one and said "That's me". She put them down, and walked to the next store. She did this a couple more times with other characters in other stores througout the couple hours we were there. Finally we were hungry and ate dinner in a nice restaurant that overlooks the skyline of the city and the bay.


The whole night she kept insisting to pay for gas, tolls, and parking. Gas costs about USD $7.20/gallon here. It costs 7 dollars everytime we hopped on the freeway or crossed county lines. I didn't let her pay for anything. One, because she's a full-time graduate student working on her masters, hence, she is not employed. Two, I wouldn't want her to waste money on such things such as gas, tolls, parking, etc. I asked her why she felt she had to pay, she just said "You drove 400 kilometers to come here, it must have been very expensive!" I just said in a sarcastic way "I didn't come just for you! You know I have other friends here!" Which was the truth since I didn't see her until my last two days of my 5-day stay in the capital city.


It was getting late, so I drove back to her town. As we did, we crossed a bridge that has a really nice view of the city and as she looked out the window she kept thanking me for the night. Then she asked me to play my favorite song on my iPod (i thought that was kinda weird!). I was staying at a hotel near her house and I was going to drive back to my city the next morning. Before she got out of the car, she asked me "What time are you going home tomorrow?" I said "Probably around 10 or 11AM, why?" She said "Let's meet tomorrow before you go. I want to see you off." So the next morning, we had breakfast together and then I began the 5 hour drive back home.


Now I'm back home, and I'm still reeling from that night. The whole night I was literally in heaven. My current conflict is should I keep it like this, or should I tell her that I have feelings for her? I've said and done things that would send those signals, so it wouldn't be a HUGE surprise to her. If I had a lot of doubt, I wouldn't even consider it. But it's the things she has said over the months and more specifically, things she did and said that night. Little things. She's expecting a letter, and I'm wondering what the contents should be.


Thanks for reading!



Cliffs Notes:

I met a girl from another country.

I moved to her country for work (not for her!)

I live far from her, so we can't see each other often

We spent the evening in the big city.

She showed vague signs of affection.

Do I move forward (slowly) and give her vagueless hints of how I feel..or just keep the status quo?

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