CallingAllAngels Posted September 1, 2008 Share Posted September 1, 2008 Jessica - honey what's the latest? Have you told anyone? Have you been able to get some help for yourself? Please keep us posted because we care. ~HUGS Allie Link to comment
jessica_girl Posted September 2, 2008 Author Share Posted September 2, 2008 everyone...there is something that i havent told you. After the rape, I got pregnant. I was two months pregnant and I overdosed and it killed the baby. believe me or not, i know its hard because i never gave you all the details. This is the reason that I find it so hard to do anything. The guy who raped me is gonna be at school tomarow and he has no idea that i was pregnant. Only one person knows and she just found out today, because I told her. I dont know what to do, all the joy is gone. Me and my bf broke up wendsday and the guy I like, i have no clue if he knows who i am. I AM THINKING OF RUNNING AWAY. My mom and step dad are fighting and getting a divorce. We are moving out of my house and into a house that we can rent. My mom said that we will probably have to get rid of my dog, and I told my dad that if my mom does that then i am running away with her. I dont know if he believes me but i really will. please help me....I have nowhere to go. My older sister went off to collage last saturday, my god father is out of the picture...my family doesnt like him anymore. My dad i dont know what to think and my mom is, well i dont know. No i havent told anyone...I dont know how. PLEASE HELP ME I HAVE NO WHERE TO GO OR TO TURN EVERYTHING IS SO MESSED UP!!!!!!!!!!!!! Link to comment
SimplySasha Posted September 2, 2008 Share Posted September 2, 2008 Jessica, how do you know that you were pregnant and that the asprin killed the baby? If you had a miscarriage, you need to see a doctor to make sure that things are alright with your reproductive system. As for the guy you like and your ex-boyfriend, right now its about time to stop worrying about boyfriends and call that hotline number and get yourself some help. Talk to the school counsilor, let them know that because of that guy you are uncomfortable and you need help getting things back to normal. Having parents fight and divorce is a hard situation on anyone and with what happened to you it will make it even harder to deal with. Start with one situation at a time or things will overwhelm you. Link to comment
CallingAllAngels Posted September 2, 2008 Share Posted September 2, 2008 Jessica, What did you overdose on that killed the baby? Are you sure it was not just your regular period? When you go to school tomorrow, make an appointment with the guidence councelor and the school nurse honey and post again. They can help you. Link to comment
jessica_girl Posted September 4, 2008 Author Share Posted September 4, 2008 Its alot harder to do then to say. Im not sure I can tell anyone. I just dont know what to do its all messed up. I might not be online for a few days all the rain is screwing up my internet. I have no clue how things are gonna work...it seems like the only way to get away is to runaway. I dont know what to do... Link to comment
SimplySasha Posted September 4, 2008 Share Posted September 4, 2008 Jessica, I understand how you feel. You have something you want to share with someone, you want to SAY it, but it's something so heavy that you can't seem to make the words come out. Writing it may be easier for you, you've already opened up to us, can you try writing the problem in a letter and then giving it to the school nurse/councilor? This way, you can put all of your thoughts into words and not have to worry about saying the right thing or even letting your emotions out and saying things not the way you intended. You can just put down the words to paper to tell your story, you have the time to go over your words and make them speak for you. Sometimes its hard to force the words from your throat but you should still be heard. Link to comment
jessica_girl Posted October 6, 2008 Author Share Posted October 6, 2008 well...for right now...life just sucks but my sister mom and step dad all found out about what happened...there is nothing any of them can do since it has been so long... they do know though...and i dont know i guess life will just go on from here... even though its not that good.. Link to comment
JadedStar Posted October 6, 2008 Share Posted October 6, 2008 Jessica, you are 14. How do you know you overdosed on something and killed a baby? I wouldn't imagine someone at 14 would really know what a miscarriage feels like. What makes you think you miscarried? A miscarriage at two months is usually just a heavy clotting period. My mother had a miscarriage at the age of 32 and was mistaken as to what happened...how do you know you miscarried? And what did you overdose on? A doctor's visit is in order if this happened. I think you need to talk to someone, for many reasons. I think you are a troubled young girl who needs to talk to someone professionally who can help you. Link to comment
Mythical_Suicide Posted October 6, 2008 Share Posted October 6, 2008 Are you positive you were pregnant? If you did infact induce a miscarriage you need to see a doctor Immediately. As others posters stated, an early miscarriage is usually like a heavy period and being 14 your cycles probably aren't exactly regular, etc etc.. Link to comment
CallingAllAngels Posted October 6, 2008 Share Posted October 6, 2008 well...for right now...life just sucks but my sister mom and step dad all found out about what happened...there is nothing any of them can do since it has been so long... they do know though...and i dont know i guess life will just go on from here... even though its not that good.. Honey - are they supportive? Link to comment
silentdarla Posted November 6, 2008 Share Posted November 6, 2008 If you told him no and that you didn't want to and he continued to have his way with you than ya it's rape. I was reading on a website that 50% of girls fight back and 50% don't when they are being raped. If you weren't willing in this situation than it's rape. Link to comment
CallingAllAngels Posted November 6, 2008 Share Posted November 6, 2008 Jessica, are there any updates hon? Link to comment
steve33 Posted November 10, 2008 Share Posted November 10, 2008 Thank you every one. I have been thinking to talk to my someone about maybe taking me to counseling. I have thought about telling my parents but then I think and wonder if that is the right thing to do. My dad understands that I have many problems, and he doesnt ask what they all are. I have thought about counseling at shcool but last time I went there for a problem, she told my parents. Thank you everyone, and maybe now I can try to stop blameing myself. Other than my parents there is no one I can talk to unless my dad decides to take me to counseling. No there is no rape crisis center in my town. I live in a small town, compared to others. YOu absolutely have to see a psychotherapist, because this sort of thing gives girls issues that they'll have for the rest of their lives, and it will impact what choices you make (making very poor decisions, especially in men), will impact the ability to have a relationship, etc. A psychologist is bound to not divulge anything you say, though your parents might want the psychologist to tell him why you are there. If you don't want to tell your parents what happened, just say you are depressed and need to see someone. Or also see a guidance counselor at school and let them know you need to see someone. Link to comment
CallingAllAngels Posted November 12, 2008 Share Posted November 12, 2008 Jessica...honey...are you still out there? Link to comment
jessica_girl Posted December 31, 2008 Author Share Posted December 31, 2008 everyone, its been a while since i have logged on things are ok.. the guy had moved off if i havent told yall this already Im now in counsiling ive only been 3 times but im going theres only one problem 'hes' back... i saw him in walmart the other day.. my knees went weak and my breathing almost stoped.. i almost fell to the ground but my friends were both there and they kept me standing he stared me down terribly.. he might be moving back again i dont think i can stand seeing him everyday my body goes numb everytime i see him.. or think about him now that i know he is back i see him in my sleep.. that is when i sleep since now it is very hard for me to fall asleep I cant do it.. id rather DIE than have to see him every day it scares me terribly being anywhere near him.. my body is still shaking uncontolably since the other day.. no one in my family knows he is back yet.. and i hope it stays that way.. even though i know i will get mentally worse seeing him everyday and aventually they will find out.. HELP.. I CANT DO THIS no im not completely sure i was pregnant.. its just as weird as this sounds.. i have these feelings and normally they are right... and i had the feeling i was.. .. please dont make fun of me saying that.. "im really afraid a few of my guy friends are going to try to kill him now that he is back.. since they know about what happened, they HATE him..i dont want any of them getting into trouble" Link to comment
CallingAllAngels Posted December 31, 2008 Share Posted December 31, 2008 Jessica...did you ever tell anyone in your family hon? You mom or dad? It sounds like you did from your post. Did they support you? If so, I think you most definitely can tell them that he's back. Did you ever report the rape to the police? Link to comment
maddylou. Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 um excuse me.. some of these posts really disturb me!!! it doesnt freaking matter if she went to his house naked.. as soon as she said no and he continued it was rape. i was raped, went thru a trial and everthing. everyone kept saying that since i didnt fight back it wasnt rape. which i believed until the judge found him guilty. i told him no.. several times and thats when he shouldve stopped. it doesnt matter what situation she is in. the SECOND she told him no he broke the law. honey, if you dont feel like reporting it, which unfortunatley wouldnt have very good chances after this long, i at least think you should get into counseling. ): something this traumatic can cause seviere mental/emotional issues for the rest of your life. please. and i am very very sorry this happened to you, dear. best of luck! Link to comment
jessica_girl Posted January 20, 2009 Author Share Posted January 20, 2009 yea, im in counsiling. It doesnt help that much. Not when my mom wont help me out at all. For some reason i feel so terrible latley. Im easily angered, i dont wanna get outa bed, i have no appitite or to big of one, and the loss of social skills. i hate it and everything. No, i didnt file a report on him, although with how many people have im sure i could still do it now.. a year later and possibly get him in some trouble. Im so affraid. Not for any specific reason. Im just scared, and i cry more now i think its just getting harder as all this time is going by. Its been a year now, and the details have become more vivid than they had been in the beginning. Id rather die than have to relive it in my mind everyday Link to comment
dreamwarrior Posted January 20, 2009 Share Posted January 20, 2009 If you said "NO" and he continued then it was rape!!! You have two fingers that should have went right into his eye sockets...personally I would never would have been alone with a guy knowing he had a violent past and two I would have fought the crude out of him, especially for my virginity. Link to comment
CallingAllAngels Posted January 20, 2009 Share Posted January 20, 2009 If you said "NO" and he continued then it was rape!!! You have two fingers that should have went right into his eye sockets...personally I would never would have been alone with a guy knowing he had a violent past and two I would have fought the crude out of him, especially for my virginity. How is this helpful to Jessica? Hindsite is 20-20. Link to comment
CallingAllAngels Posted January 20, 2009 Share Posted January 20, 2009 yea, im in counsiling. It doesnt help that much. Not when my mom wont help me out at all. For some reason i feel so terrible latley. Im easily angered, i dont wanna get outa bed, i have no appitite or to big of one, and the loss of social skills. i hate it and everything. No, i didnt file a report on him, although with how many people have im sure i could still do it now.. a year later and possibly get him in some trouble. Im so affraid. Not for any specific reason. Im just scared, and i cry more now i think its just getting harder as all this time is going by. Its been a year now, and the details have become more vivid than they had been in the beginning. Id rather die than have to relive it in my mind everyday Jessica, what does your counselor say about possibly talking to OTHER girls who experienced this? Are you near a Rape Crisis Center? Maybe if you could talk to some other girls who have been through the same thing it would be helpful. Sending you big hugs. Keep posting, and keep on going sweetie. Link to comment
dreamwarrior Posted January 20, 2009 Share Posted January 20, 2009 How is this helpful to Jessica? Hindsite is 20-20. Don't just lay there and let someone abuse you, you must fight. She says that she just layed there...geez fight him off. A guy over 10 years ago tried that to me and I kicked him in the stomach so hard he got scared and ran off..I knocked the air right out of him...and this was before my martial arts training. I was just telling her to defend herself...I am studying for my blackbelt in karate and my goal is to teach woman and children to defend themselves...gouging someones eyes out if you are unarmed is better than being raped...if they cannot see then they cannot rape you...you get my point? Then she must go directly to the police station to make a report and then the hospital to make sure she is okay and then some counseling if needed, because this is traumatic to a person. Perhaps my last post wasn't very informative. I was just trying to be brief. She should have reported it right away or he is going to do this again to someone else. I also have three daughters in their 20's, in which one of them is named Jessica...I pity any guy who tries to hurt one of my girls. Wonder if she told her parents this happened.....veneral disease is also a big problem too. I hate to see women and children being victims. Link to comment
turkieblue Posted January 21, 2009 Share Posted January 21, 2009 Dream, you can't change the past. Why put unneeded guilt on "would have could have" when at the time she simply "could not". She was frozen in fear, and no amount of hindsight is going to help her now. What if she resisted and he killed her? Or beat her and then raped her? How is any of that helpful now? Jessica, it is absolutely NOT your fault, or anything you could have done. I had a friend who was also raped. I wanted to slash his throat. She would never tell me who, or point him out. She said she didn't want me to wreck my life for her. If you are worried that your friends might do something, maybe telling them this will help. Link to comment
dreamwarrior Posted January 21, 2009 Share Posted January 21, 2009 Dream, you can't change the past. Why put unneeded guilt on "would have could have" when at the time she simply "could not". She was frozen in fear, and no amount of hindsight is going to help her now. What if she resisted and he killed her? Or beat her and then raped her? How is any of that helpful now? Jessica, it is absolutely NOT your fault, or anything you could have done. I had a friend who was also raped. I wanted to slash his throat. She would never tell me who, or point him out. She said she didn't want me to wreck my life for her. If you are worried that your friends might do something, maybe telling them this will help. I didn't say it was her fault...where did you read that in my post? Rapist like the weak and scared...they are predators...doesn't matter if she was nude or whatever (hypothetically speaking), that doesn't give him the right to do that to her. So to answer her question...You told him "NO" and he continued so "YES" you were raped!! I swear the second my Sensei hands me my blackbelt I am going to start teaching women to fight....and will gladly do it for free. Most of my co-workers are female and feel safe around me, because they know I won't let anything happen to them....they know I am a woman of honor, of good moral fiber with alot of courage...I would gladly risk my own life to save someone else without a second thought. Sorry this happened to you...seek counseling and please be careful who you go off with the next time. hugs to you! Link to comment
CallingAllAngels Posted January 21, 2009 Share Posted January 21, 2009 Dream, you can't change the past. Why put unneeded guilt on "would have could have" when at the time she simply "could not". She was frozen in fear, and no amount of hindsight is going to help her now. What if she resisted and he killed her? Or beat her and then raped her? How is any of that helpful now? Jessica, it is absolutely NOT your fault, or anything you could have done. I had a friend who was also raped. I wanted to slash his throat. She would never tell me who, or point him out. She said she didn't want me to wreck my life for her. If you are worried that your friends might do something, maybe telling them this will help. Great post. Jessica...can you give us an update hon? Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.