In love and moving

[Sebulous]

((sorry its sorta long. 1.5 years of emotion spilling out))

 

I have really fallen in love with this co worker. My 1st love. We have worked together for 1 year and 5 months. She quit the job for like 3 months about 9 months ago and we hardly spoke. Most painfull thing ever. She came back and we continued being great friends.

 

Me and her are very much alike. We tend to have the absolute worst relationships with others. Niether of us seem to get past a 2nd date. We both laugh and share our stories of dating shames. She can 180 my mood in 5 mins of being around her.

 

She has told me I have done the sweetest things for her. Gave her the most wonderful compliments. Found our how she would like to get flowers and did it. Gave her the best gift for her B-day. When I asked her seriously if there is anything wrong or I should change about me, she said "nothing, you are perfect just as is"

 

Her excuse for us not dating was our age. I am 19 and she is 24. Finally we did go out on 2 friend dates. We spent like 12 hours together on each date. We took along someone else to make it feel more over a friend thing. This there took 1 year before we went out. Never been out since.

 

One day at work we both spilled out or deepest secrets. Both of which shocked the other. Also, I finally had to break the news to her that I was moving to England spring / summer 2004 that I heard about a week beforehand. After which she kept quiet around me.

 

The following day of sharing this we had some small talk and she told me that she thought of me as a brother. I know she has strong feelings for me. 1/3 of the things out of our mouths are obvious sexual inuendo. She obviously flirts BIG time. I would bet my, pardon my french, left nut, that she has some strong feelings for me. I mean I'm shocked that after almost a year and half we have NEVER run out of things to talk about.

 

however, today at work, one of the 1st things from her mouth was reaffirming that I think nothing more than a friend to her, which I sorta lied and said yes. I really love everything about her. There is nothing she can do to make me hate her. She can do something that I don't approve of, but never stop loving her.

 

I found out the reason she did this was that she has a new BF. They been dating for a month now. However she has been saying she does and doesn't like him. He is rude at times but she likes being around him. no one in her family likes him, unlike me. He came over for her during closing and she was picking and making fun of him. I joined into to try to intimidate him. I'd slice his throat if I could legally......

 

It seems we are absolutely perfect for each other. We like / hate the same things. I practically know her better than my family. After she heard i was moving, she did say that she regretted not giving me a chance.

 

NOW the question. Do I keep quiet and let her go cause I know nothing will come out of it, or do I pop and tell her everything? When should I do this? She gets extremely stand offish when i mention anything about us being together and that such. I don't wont to wait until last day before I leave as it will make the move harder.

 

((sorry for bad order of paragraphs. little flustered and spewing out things as i recall them))

[Medusa]

first i'd liek to say you ordered the paragraphs well .

 

Now for the problem at hand TELL HER! you must .i envy you you found someone perfect to you no strings suduce her write her a long letter give her flowers on one knee and spill your love redered heart to her tell her how you where so in love that you wrote this question and print to show how love sick you are if i know one thing about love is things like that only happen rarely nothing worth having is easy to obten my friend if you don't tell her now someoneelse may and it will be forfeit .I think you should be as subtle as you can and ask her on a lunchin or friendly walk

 

or something and surprise her by takin her somewhere romantic or succuled for you to work your charms hand her a flower hide it best you can in a bag mayhaps say you had to do some shopping then you can either have tied your letter of devotion to that flower/s or hand it to her after then if conditions are pramitting a half kneeing profession of love is always a good way to show how selfless you are and how crazy in love too.do anything you can to woo and take her away from that jerk shes with now age doesn't matter the heart know no age or distance

 

i'M crossing my fingers for you and hope that you get her back

take her with you to london

 

good luck!

-Cheshire

[Sebulous]

I can do the letter part. However, she gets very.... afraid it seems when I talk about us. I mention anything about liking her and the reaction I get from her is attrocious in a way. She kinda pulls away and stares at me in shock / disbelief. Like in old days, a lower class speaking to an upper crust. The "how dare you" kinda pull back. However, I absolutely know she likes me. Thats why im in a twist. she likes me but has that very strange reaction.

 

Only thing I fear is losing what I already have with her. If it runs over very bad with her, I still have 2 - 6 months of work with her.

 

( I did write her a poem for Valentines day to go with her flowers. It was asking why don't we become BF / GF. She said she was shocked that I did that. that was the last she ever talked about it)

 

 

Heres a little email I got that I would incorperate into my letter..........

 

 

There are moments in life when you miss someone so much that you just want to pick them from your dreams and hug them for real! When the door of happiness closes, another opens; but often times we look so long at the closed door that we don't see the one, which has been opened for us.

 

Don't go for looks; they can deceive. Don't go for wealth; even that fades away.

 

Go for someone who makes you smile, because it takes only a smile to make a dark day seem bright. Find the one that makes your heart smile.

 

Dream what you want to dream; go where you want to go; be what you want to be, because you have only one life and one chance to do all the things you want to do.

 

May you have enough happiness to make you sweet, enough trials to make you strong, enough sorrow to keep you human and enough hope to make you happy.

 

The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes along their way. The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past; you can't go forward in life until you let go of your past failures and heartaches.

 

When you were born, you were crying and everyone around you was smiling.

 

Live your life so at the end, you're the one who is smiling and everyone around you is crying.

 

Don't count the years-count the memories...........

 

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take; but by the moments that take our breath away

[vfunkera]

wooooooooh slow down there this stuff is gold! that is one good email you got there!

 

You will never realise how precious time is until you give it away. We will always take things for granted, and realise what we lost after its gone. You must tell her how you feel, otherwise you will go to London and regret not telling someone you loved them and how much they ment to you. Trust me, and have no regrets, she should know how you feel about her. I predict that this email/letter thing will have her crying if you can link it to yourself in some way. Great stuff!

 

Good luck!

[slider]

I mention anything about liking her and the reaction I get from her is attrocious in a way. She kinda pulls away and stares at me in shock / disbelief.

 

Dude, she only likes you as a friend. Where do you get the signs that she has romantic feelings for you anyway? Everything you described in your NOVEL here points to friendship. She has a boyfriend to boot. You say, "I absolutely know she likes me" is true. But only as a friend. Don't believe me? Read your quote at the top. Sorry to have to break it to you this way, but you needed a clue.

 

What to do?

 

you can't go forward in life until you let go of your past failures and heartaches

 

Take your quote above and put it into action.

[Sebulous]

she admitted to likeing me and said regretted giving me a chance.

[slider]

Sebulous, I'm sorry to hear that. Why? Because so many guys fall for what women "say" and do not read their actions instead. Some women will say anything to keep a guy at arm's length. Here's what I'm getting at: If you believe that she REALLY likes you, what is she doing to prove it? I really hate to burst your bubble but she's taken and her heart is somewhere else as it should be. So why waste your time on her when there's lots of other women our there? You seem like a very nice, thoughtful and deep person and should find no trouble finding someone else. So Sebulous, put that one aside and rid yourself anymore heartache. Move on to someone with better taste.