niceandslow Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 Okay. Say you have been in a relationship for a year. Your bf or gf is moving out of their apartment and into a new place. The problem is they can't move into the new place for a week, and they absolutely have to be out of the old apartment. Would you let them stay with you for the week in between? Why or why not?? Link to comment
NorthDallas40 Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 I'd do it. It's only a week, they need help, it would be a taste of what living together might be like, and it would probably be fun. Link to comment
Lana0120 Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 Yes. If you need to even ask that question though, I would have to ask why the answer isn't a resounding yes. Do you not want to be together for a week? Are you worried it will give signals that you want to move in together? Are you worried that the suggestion would be taken badly? Link to comment
Gracelove Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 Absolutely!!!! I'd do almost anything for a significant other. They're like family. Besides it's someone you really love, you wouldn't leave them out in the cold. You want to make life as pleasant for them as possible. Link to comment
CallingAllAngels Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 Yes, I would certainly let them move in with me. Can I ask why you ask the question? Link to comment
niceandslow Posted May 24, 2008 Author Share Posted May 24, 2008 I have to move out next Saturday, and I cannot move into my new place until June 8th. I asked my boyfriend if I can stay with him for that week. Link to comment
CallingAllAngels Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 I have to move out next Saturday, and I cannot move into my new place until June 8th. I asked my boyfriend if I can stay with him for that week. and he said????? Link to comment
niceandslow Posted May 24, 2008 Author Share Posted May 24, 2008 he told me no. he said he can't commit to that and it is a big deal for him. Link to comment
CallingAllAngels Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 he told me no. he said he can't commit to that and it is a big deal for him. You are gonna leave me alone....are you SERIOUS???? For ONE WEEK, and you have been together for a year????? Wow... I am at a loss here... Are there problems in your relationship????? Link to comment
CaptainNapalm Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 Ofcourse I would. Without hesitation. A years time should further the relationship to a level where there should be no issue with letting someone into your place for a week or two. Link to comment
niceandslow Posted May 24, 2008 Author Share Posted May 24, 2008 I am at a loss too. There aren't problems. I usually spend the night 2 or 3 nights a week anyway. Link to comment
CallingAllAngels Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 Can you talk to him more about it, or is it a completely open and shut case? Link to comment
niceandslow Posted May 24, 2008 Author Share Posted May 24, 2008 I asked him today for a definite answer, and he said it's a no. and he feels like i am pressuring him. my grandparents offered to put me in a hotel for the week but why should i waste their money when i could have stayed with him for the week. it makes absolute no sense to me. Link to comment
sophie274 Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 Have you two ever gone on vacation together? Will his daughter spend the night there while you are there? (Is that part of the problem)? Link to comment
niceandslow Posted May 24, 2008 Author Share Posted May 24, 2008 Have you two ever gone on vacation together? Will his daughter spend the night there while you are there? (Is that part of the problem)? no vacation together. his daugher is with her mother the whole week and won't be spending the night. Link to comment
sophie274 Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 If I were you I would drop the subject for now and stay at the hotel (do you have a place to store your things?). But once you move in and get settled, I would take some time to reflect on the relationship. Do you feel that he is committed to you? Is it going forward the way you want it to go forward? You mentioned moving in together in an earlier thread, and said that he had brought it up. That doesn't really square with him freaking out over you staying with him for a week. Do you think he might be hiding something from you? I hate to throw that out there because you said the relationship is fine, but it just seems so strange! Link to comment
niceandslow Posted May 24, 2008 Author Share Posted May 24, 2008 Do you think he might be hiding something from you? I hate to throw that out there because you said the relationship is fine, but it just seems so strange! I can't help but think he is hiding something. My gut tells me he is cheating on me and that is why he doesn't want me to stay there. Link to comment
sophie274 Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 I can't help but think he is hiding something. My gut tells me he is cheating on me and that is why he doesn't want me to stay there. To be perfectly honest that thought would cross my mind too. Do you have any other reason to think he could be cheating? Can you give us more details about the relationship? You said earlier there were no proble,s. Link to comment
CallingAllAngels Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 I must say...this raises some red flags for me as well. I am wondering about the cheating. Link to comment
niceandslow Posted May 24, 2008 Author Share Posted May 24, 2008 I am trying to think about anything. He is 40, and he has never committed to anyone. He told me awhile ago I was the first woman he has never cheated on or lied to, but even if he tells me that, once a cheater always a cheater. Plus him at his age not being able to commit to anybody, why me and why now? Link to comment
CallingAllAngels Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 Oh hon....I am sorry. Like they say...actions speak louder than words. If he had nothing to hide, why wouldn't he let you stay for a week. Think about it. He must have something to hide. I am so very sorry. Link to comment
CallingAllAngels Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 It's almost like that old saying "you can't teach an old dog new tricks"... Link to comment
Crazyaboutdogs Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 Wow, this is a screaming red flag. This is not even about living together, this is about helping your girlfriend who is in a difficult situation. It is not like you would be crashing there forever...it is just one week until your new place gets sorted. I would definitely re-think this relationship...this is a test of how he would be when the chips are down and he has failed that test. Link to comment
Gracelove Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 he told me no. he said he can't commit to that and it is a big deal for him. WHAT?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And you're still with him? If he can't do something as simple as let you crash at his place, then you can't count on him for more serious things. Link to comment
CallingAllAngels Posted May 24, 2008 Share Posted May 24, 2008 Wow, this is a screaming red flag. This is not even about living together, this is about helping your girlfriend who is in a difficult situation. It is not like you would be crashing there forever...it is just one week until your new place gets sorted. I would definitely re-think this relationship...this is a test of how he would be when the chips are down and he has failed that test. I completely agree with this..... Link to comment
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