Day by Day Let us all know!

[AmandaB]

Right there with you. I hate myself for not being able to deal... I have let it consume my life, it's made me miserable. I'm setting here not thinking of one thing I want to do. Nothing seems to work. I cant leave and out run, cant sit here and out think it. I don't know what to do, I have worried my friends and family to death about it. Im sooo tired of talking about it and just tired period. I dont have anything left to say about it, I just wanna go to sleep and wake up 2 years down the road.

 

I am with you on that one. My friends and family are tired of hearing about it. Its been talked out to death, beating a dead horse. I would rather just go to sleep for the next few years.

[iiidioteque]

Day 18...being trying to not be too hopeful about coming out of this break. Starting to maybe consider that there could be someone else, although he chose the "no seeing other people/hooking up" rule.

 

Why else would he call me, but still not have his mind made up? Hmmm.

Getting sadder as the days go on, instead of better.

[Gateway]

Day 18...being trying to not be too hopeful about coming out of this break. Starting to maybe consider that there could be someone else, although he chose the "no seeing other people/hooking up" rule.

 

Why else would he call me, but still not have his mind made up? Hmmm.

Getting sadder as the days go on, instead of better.

 

 

The somebody else thing:

 

Feels like there is always someone else.....if there is or not it still feels that way. Such an awful feeling. That's ironicly the last thing that creeps in my head at night. Sucks I know but hang in there.

 

Next thing is are you prepared to hear that if it comes up? I dont think I am. I think it would but me back to feeling like I did day one. That's why NC is important. If there is someone else I pray I never hear about it.

 

Anyone else not sleep? I cant sleep to at all. When I finally do fall pass out from lake of sleep id doesnt take anything much to wake me up and its breaking me down. I hate this crap. I have lost close to 25 pounds to. I wanted to loose it but not this way. Im at about 170 now.

[Gateway]

Also watching movies Such as "He's just not that into you" kills me too. I have trouble not relating any and everything thing to her. Its the worst. I started listening to country songs because we never listened to it before but god how sad these songs are. I tried a break up cd I made with angry break up songs on it but it made me worse. Tried talk radio but its either so mind numbing or its sports talk which is fine but they eventually start talking about a certain team that reminds me of her. I have a 45 minute commute every morning so I have to listen to something. Maybe books on CD....god how disparate and pitiful I must be tohave to resort to that.

 

 

I watched "Reign on Me" the movie with Adam Sandler and I feel almost like his role in the film.

[Brokenheart00]

Me and my ex broke up about four weeks now. I started to NC about 5 days ago. I feel good.

 

I am happy.

 

 

I hope he is happy and I pray for him. I don't want to crash into him nor see him.

[Brokenheart00]

I don't know why in a way I am happier without my ex. I was devastated for the first two and 1/2 weeks. Maybe the feeling just temporary? I hope not. I eat more and sleep better.

[Gateway]

I feel like I am very much fine without someone but if I evey break up with them I feel so souless. This last time I know I did about as well as anyone can do and it has failed to this point. 12 days of NC and I dont think I'll ever hear from her again.We wont ever bump into each other, if we do it would be so rare, so that is good i guess. Its just hard to to not having her be the first person to her from in the morning. And the what I thought was excessive txt all day long that now I dont find were that excessive at all. I miss those txt. Now when I get a txt im so trained to think its her that when its someone else I'm disappointed (that awful way to be). There is no way she doesn't miss me but it appears she didn't care like she said or atleast I thought she did.

 

 

I dont know what to do next time I get in a relationship I have been burnt sooooo many times. It seems with women you're thelast one to know. Even if she came back I'd be so scared of her it wouldn't work. Id rather be beat to death by a boxer than have my emotions ripped up. Why do I let this happen. Am I weak or do ppl who truly care end up in the shape I'm in.

[gottabelieve]

Day 7 Break-Up / Day 4 NC

 

Isn't it amazing how you have some moments where you feel so enormously strong.... and then just the smallest thing can completely ruin you? I've been having these tremendous ups ("I am so much better without her - blessing in disguise x 1000") and downs ("How can I survive?"). It's fascinating that even after having experienced a number of other break-ups far more severe than this one and knowing that this is the progression, it's like I'm back to square one and haven't learned a thing.

 

For those of you who feel like it's the end of your life, those of you who can't sleep, those of you alone in your room and in the world, those of who who worry about finding someone else who will accept your insecurities: you will get past this. I've been on the receiving end of all types of break-ups and have survived each of them and emerged stronger. But even so, I still have that awful feeling in my chest right now when I think about this most recent one of "only" 3 months - I still overanalyze everything she did, every email and text that she sent - so no one moves past a broken heart easily.

 

But I promise you, in a few years time, you will look back and be very proud of yourself for getting through this. Good luck, all....

[Brokenheart00]

I think it is my Day 6 of Nc. Not sure though. We broke up for about 4 weeks.

 

I am not sure how I feel toward him right now. The feeling is not love. Sometimes, I feel that I miss him but I don't miss him. In a way, I want to be with him but I don't want to be with him. Yes I think about him from time to time but think about all the things that happened between us in the past, I feel that I am better off without him.

 

I had a dream about him last night and didn't really miss him when I wake up. I feel proud of myself for going NC this long. This is my first time doing it. I feel like I have respect and dignity.

 

I hope I won't bump into him anywhere because we live really close to each other. I don't know how I would react if I happen to see him. I might just turn my back and walk away because I am not ready to face him.

 

My first love is gone.

 

I wonder if he even thinks of me or have completely erased me from his mind? In a way, I don't know what it's like to be with him.

 

Does he thinking about me at this moment?

[Copper]

day 6 of breakup, day 3 NC...I feel pretty bad right now..I went to work, thought about her every single second. Im going to a music show tonight at a local venue. Where I remember seeing her for the first time, and whispering to my friend "shes cute"...I never thought I would ever meet nor be with someone so amazing, and now that amazing person is gone. I almost feel like right when I get in there and look behind me where she was sitting im going to just start crying.. And I cant stop thinking about it, I want her back, so so so much. I miss her so so so much. It almost seems like I feel worse each day..I want her to call me and say she made a mistake and wants me back...I think about that scenario all the time and it is really hurting me, because me not being in the right mind is giving me hope....and as much as it sucks, hope is not what I need right now...

Thanks for reading.

[lila...]

It's been exactly 2 weeks since the breakup. I still dream about him almost daily, I wake up really sad and missing him, and I think about him almost the whole day, but I would say that in general I'm getting better and used to the idea we're not together. I've had my moments of weaknesses, once I texted him showing my very weak side, he texted back to "be strong". But things are looking better, I just wish he wasn't on my mind so constantly, I wish hypnosis would work to help me disappear him from my mind.

[nicknick]

It's about two weeks for me. I wasn't really in a relationship. i was really good friends with someone i had developed feelings for. I told her and unfortunately for me she had just started to date this guy she met on link removed.

 

We are still friends and will probably meet up next week. I am now resigned to the fact that she will only ever see me as a friend. Sure i feel sad and in a way i regret not making more of an effort when i was actually seeing her for a short while last year (it fizzled out mainly due to me being ill for quite a while and the fact that i didn't think her heart was in it at the time).

 

That's life i guess. For the time being i will harbour hopes of maybe one day getting together....but my head tells me this is extremely unlikely. To be honest each day that passes the pain is easing.....good luck to you all.

[Gateway]

Day19:

 

Crappy. All day, it never lets up. I have even started to drink, I havent drank in 10 years.

 

So close to breaking NC.

[emptyinside70]

After about a month post breakup of the so called friendship and two months post her breaking up with my by text:

 

Feel like absolute crap and used. Found out she's in another relationship. She told me that she didn't have time to see anyone and she didn't want to be in a relationship until her daughter was older. All she did was take and take from me and faked being into me. She told me that she thought I was the one more or less and I thought the same about her. Apparently all LIES! She is a horrible person, used my family as guinea pigs, kept questioning whether and how I liked her, and toyed with my emotions. I hope she gets everything she deserves.

 

I should have stopped talking to her in April. A hard lesson to learn again, you can never be friends with your ex. I knew from the very beginning that this would not work out and I was right. I just wish I hadn't wasted my time or energy with this one.

[Thornbirds18]

Almost six weeks' NC! The heart still feels stabbing pain whenever I think about the whole thing. But begin to stop asking why and focusing on my life. Not so many tears and only cry once every a few days. Some improvement but just hope to stop this pain as soon as I can! Wonder if anyone can invent some pain killers for the broken-hearted?

[Gateway]

Wonder if anyone can invent some pain killers for the broken-hearted?

 

 

My cuz and I were just talking about that today.....I wish I had the formula for that..... I'd be a very rich man.

 

Heading into day23> Talked to her best friend the other day. She said the ex is trying to act like it doesn't bother her and pretty much refuses to talk about it but she knows shes F^&ked up now and it shows.... kinda makes me feel better in a way.....kinda doesn't make any sense. It's like its a game., but I'm not breaking my silence, I don't need games. Heard also she is stalking my MYspace page and gets very upset when she sees I have comments from other girls also she had asked her friend to ride by and see if I have anyone else over at my house to which the friend refuses (props to her)....that warms my heart in a evil way lol...feel like im in high school again.

 

It's very immature and frustrating but I keep reminding myself is she cares enough to worry about me in that childish way but can't lower herself to break and call me then I don't need her. BTW I didn't offer the best friend any info on my exploits since the break up but I'm sure it shows in my face. The friend says she is stupid for doing it and knows she knows she messed up. I guess if nothing else its a little bitter sweet.

 

I was fine until I typed this out but just now I'm sad and confused again so I guess I'll take a break from this forum becaus eit reminds me of the pain I have suffered silently for the last 3 weeks. I think it's time to move on a little further.

 

Thanks to everyone for paying attention to me and I hope the next time you see me I'll be new person with or without her in my life. This forum has kept me from calling and doing something stupid many a night just reading it.

[SpeedingCars]

Gateway- you were fine without this woman before and you will be okay again. The beginning is always tough... but you will get through it. It's hard to believe, but you will. Try to avoid getting new info about her, whether it's through your friends or family. You don't need to know what she's been doing...it will only prolong the pain and it really doesn't do anything good for u & I think you should separate yourself from those that are close to her.

 

I hope everything works out for you & when you decide to come back to this forum, hopefully you are feeling better =)

[Bestfriendgone]

Day 15 of NC, Broken up for 2.5 months now.

 

And yes, it is getting better for me. Time does heal.

[dimnickel1980]

was broken up with because of GIGS 8 days ago. on third day of nc. i really hate holidays like the fourth of july. sitting around and watching lights in the sky.. without them next to you like before.

 

keep going through mood cycles of "I want to be young and rebellious" or "he could he out with someone else." I def enjoy the first mood better, but i'm at home for the summer with nothing to do and no way to do stupid teenager things.

 

can't get a summer job in this economy. any ideas for a new hobby? I'm very artistic (mostly with designing things). I need something i can really immerse myself in. most of my previous hobbies like web design haven't been holding my attention since the breakup. i would also like something where i could be around ppl...

[Gateway]

32 days:

 

She txt me the 4th of July that she missed me folowed by 3 calls from her friend, I didn't answer she gonna have to a lil better than that. I'm actually not ready to talk about stuff (weird) So we will see. But I do feel better most of the time.

 

Pluggin away..........

[dimnickel1980]

talked to his sister today. told me the same bs as him. you're young so you don't have real feelings.. just date other people! no need to count days when it's over for good.

[arcadefire]

Creeping piece of s--- cheater sent me an email to my work email. Read it, deleted it. Never want to think about him again.

[SpeedingCars]

saw him today, hooked up.

feel very low, used, unpretty, stupid, disrespected, naive.

but going on vacation soon for 2 weeks.

i am seriously ready to leave him behind...i don't know what's holding me back.

[dimnickel1980]

day 8

 

sort of had a setback. emailed his sister, but it helped me move on so i don't feel so bad. i have also deactivated my facebook after seeing weird picture of him.

 

i'm not sure if i'm numb, don't care, or what it is.. but i don't feel pain this instant. he isn't who he used to be, so i am losing all love for him.

[mad rabbits]

I'm two weeks since I last contacted him and 12 days since I deleted him off facebook (if you want to count looking on his fb page as contact).

 

I'm feeling better, have stopped crying. I am in the anger phase right now.