Asking for help: what good does it do?

[krogen]

What good does it do?

 

If you truly explain yourself, if you truly explain your feelings, it won't help. It won't do a thing except for ruining things down even more.

 

You tell a psychologist that you think about suicide. You talk... For hours. And then you feel like leaving, but she won't let you. She calls the authorities and they come for you. They ask you more questions and soon enough you're in a psychiatric hospital. You can't leave. It's all a nightmare. A nightmare that won't end. You pinch yourself, but you still have not opened your eyes. You sleep in the hospital, attend meetings, and you're asked if you feel any better. No, I don't feel any better. My parents know now that I resorted to suicide, my parents have thousandths of dollars to pay for the hospital. And they cry. Cry for the burden you have caused. You're looked upon as someone with a disability. A psycho. An emo. You're asked again how you're feeling. You tell them you feel great and will never consider suicide again... Just to get out of the hospital. The four walls that were your whole world for a week. They release you. But you are not any different then you were last week. You're the same person. With the same problem. And the same solution on the horizon. You can't have a normal relationship with anyone. Everyone treats you... differently. The whole world treats you differently. You have nightmares almost every single day about what you have done. Your parents are in debt. The whole world fell apart.

 

That's what asking for help causes.

[Entropy Smith]

Your description is pretty accurate actually. Thats why you have to take responsibility for your own mental health. But you ain't the first to go down that road and get the stigma attached to you.

 

Counseling/therapy has its place and can help but there is no salvation in it (pardon the religious phrase thats not what i intended to imply.) You need to give yourself a break, realize that overcoming these issues is your journy, and to some degree it never ends. But when you come back from such a depth...man the powers you can wield...

[daisy11769]

the only person that can truly help you is you... talking about it with someone else just gives you more perspective on whats actually going on. I dont know what your issues are, but truly and honestly stop running from your problems! its harder to face them and its not going to be easy and it will hurt but you will be stronger for it- killing yourself to me is a poor way to solve things and your just running away from the issues. I myself have been in ur shoes and sometimes even now i think i still am, but i couldnt kill myself, no matter what my family has done to me and how they have hurt me- i love them to much to put them thur that... you seem like you just need someone to listen without judgement,maybe this site might help u do that without trying to send you to a mental hospital... try a journal write down 100 things about yourself... when u do that write everything dislikes, feelings,likes,experiances anything that describes you as a person and dont write as if someone is going to read it just write things down include things people may never know about you just write 100 things... after you have done that write down every possible goal or things you want to do in ur lifetime, become a millionaire once in ur life, writing a book anything and everything u would like to do once......maybe u might get some feedback on who you are and what u want in life; stop looking at the relationships with other people and trying to make them happy, you cant make them happy if u dont know what makes u happy..... and you know what no relationship with people is the same- ever! people are all different no one person is the same, just becuz the people that are in your life now dont understand doesnt mean u wont meet someone who doesnt understand you, it just seems like that right now becuz depression isolates you but trust me eventually you will meet people that will understand and the world wont seem so cold...

[Eric2.0]

I can't say much, but last year I got so bad that one night I decided to drive myself out to the Marcy building. The following morning I just got a shower and drove out there... I just walked into the office and sat down in the waiting room...didn't say anything until the secretary came over to me and asked me if I needed to talk with someone. I jusy said..yeah.

 

I'm glad I did that...really glad. I plan on revisiting very soon. I actually enjoy talking about stuff with a stranger.. it does help to a point.

[Gracelove]

Talking about your feelings definitely helps. It relieves a lot of stress.

 

Have you called a suicide hotline before? I called one a while back. It really helped because there is a complete stranger on the other line, and you are supposed to explain to them why you want to commit suicide.

And you the sit there and think, this is absurd, what am I doing?

 

Something about talking changes things. I don't know, words are so powerful.

 

Wow! My mom drove me to the hospital over a year ago. I spent three days in the psych ward, and it cured me!

 

Whew! It was something. I met a really sweet person there, but there were quite a few scary people there.

 

And those meeting suck. I kept thinking, isn't this a place where you are supposed to be able to rest?

 

And it's so funny how they always ask you your name and birthday before giving you medicine! LOL!

 

I was like thinking, "You just called my name a few minutes ago, I doubt your forgotten it between now and then".

 

Aside from the lighter moments, it was a nightmare. You can't go anywhere, you can't go outside. You're around people who talk to themselves, or scream at night. You can only talk on the phone for a few minutes. People don't trust you with a plastic zip-loc bag. Whew, nightmare.

 

Anywho, it didn't deter you from being suicidal?! Doesn't the thought of going back to that place...have any positive effects on your thinking?

 

Why are your parents in debt? You don't have health insurance?

 

Why does everyone know you were in the hospital's psych ward?

 

Why do you say you can't have a normal relationship with anyone? How long have you felt this way? How long have you been depressed? Do you know what caused your depression?

 

Are you on medicine? How old are you?

[Daddy Bear]

Of course it can be beneficial to ask for help. Longiing for death is twisted thinking; a person equipped to deal with malformed ideas of this nature can often point out where the logical fallacy lies and change the sufferer's mind about suicide being the best course of action.

 

In other words, I see no harm in saying, "Okay, Doc, I have had thoughts in the past of killing myself. Take your best shot and tell me why I shouldn't." if you're afraid of being locked up, just don't say that the thoughts are current ones. it won't affect the answers you get. But let me hasten to add that many, many people have come out of their suicidal modes and been thankful beyond words that someone did take them to hospital to stop them!

 

Look around this forum: we seek the advice of others on much more trivial matters than taking one's own life. Suicide is the most drastic, tragic, destructive and permanent thing a person can do to him/herself; why shouldn't we get a professional (or, at the very least, clear-headed) second opinion on that?

[Eric2.0]

Yes... When I went in I was tired of it all.. the thoughts started to scare me alot and I knew I didn't care about what they said about it... if they locked me up in a place then so be it, I didn't care back then. All I knew is I wanted out of these feelings and I wanted to stop thinking about "it"

 

It takes alot to tell yourself to talk to someone.. I did it and I'm proud I didn't give in to the thoughts. OP, Talking and telling someone really does help, don't be hard on yourself.

 

Live for the future, not the past.

 

BTW, O.P. are you still with us?.. Please respond if you can.

[Eric2.0]

I also wanted to know from the O.P Is this a real life exoirience for you, or is this an assumption you made?. Let me tellya, it is not what you describe.. you're being way to hard on yourself. Last year I had real thoughts... My mind seemed to almost make the decision for me, and I didn't feel like I had any heart left. It scared me so much that I did not care if they locked me up or what anyone family or not thought of me after.

 

I wanted to be someplace other than the place I was in, and I didn't care about the after effects. All I know is that I was strong and I told them my feelings...very bad feelings.. Being held by a stranger balling my eyes out on the floor(yes it was a guy councellor) was so relieving.. I think you should go and release yourself, and tell them how you feel.

[Eric2.0]

Try having them practically laugh at you.

 

Society hasn't got the money or the time for perseverance. Essentially you're on your own.

 

No, little missy, you're not alone.. if you want to get help then you need to go yourself and lay it on the table. They can help you manage your thoughts to a more tolerable amount. They can help you with dealing with it and help you manage it.

 

If you're not happy in your current treatment then you need to find someplace you are more comfortable with. I was lucky.. I am still with the first guy I went to.. I talk well with him.

 

I wish the original Poster would write something in here again.. Please post if you see this.

[Eric2.0]

Oh and I had a post deleted from Admin up above that says profanuty for the reason... It was because of a word I wrote.. it wasn't intentional.. Just so you know.

 

Original Poster.. where are you?

[Chele]

It is important to ask for help in the right places. A psycho ward is the last place for anyone, it is creating problems. I think people need to have support, kindness, understanding and compassion not branded with pshyco illnesses that are completely fabricated by pharmaceutical companies to create business.

If you are upset you need someone caring that is normal. It is abnormal this society we live in that say upset or sad people have an illness, that is wrong and such places or so-called physicians that follow this mindset should be avoided.

[Eric2.0]

^^ That makes a lot of sense. I know when I walked into the Marcy building....I lucked out... The first guy I talked with was the right guy. He read me like a book and I really felt better when I started seeing him...

 

To the O.P... They're are people that can help that won't label you whatever... They won't lock you up and throw away the key you know. I know it's scary, but really try to go to someone.. It is so worth it.

 

Please stop in and write something... I hope you're still around...