Lucy_lou Posted January 9, 2008 Share Posted January 9, 2008 Ok, so I've got a new job (my first real job) and it's in a large government department. here's my question in short: should I start taking an interest in football even though I hate it, just to increase my conversation and make new friends? They seem quite progressive, however, it's still just a government department, and at a recent meeting (in the small talk) they asked me what football team I follow (I'm an Aussie, so that's Aussie rules footy, but I'm open to feedback from other countries which also place way too much importance on dumb sports.) Anyway, I live in a country where a LOT of people are into it. I don't associate with people who are into it in my own time, but I realise that in the workplace there will always be a lot of people for whom the main common chit chat topic is going to be the god damned footy. I really would like to meet and get on friendly terms with as many people as I can, so I'm considering taking a small interest, but it would be totally not me. I really hate it and I hate it that my country is so football obsessed. It would be fake, and it would mislead people about my personality, but it also may break the ice with people I otherwise might not have much to talk about. Any opinions? Link to comment
Kiwi_Sweet Posted January 9, 2008 Share Posted January 9, 2008 Why do you hate football? I think sports are great! They keep children and teens out of trouble. It seems like the only form of exercise kids get now-a-days, and it's FUN! I'm not into sports that much, but it definitely has more ups than downs. I think it's great way to socialize too! It gives people something to look forward and it's a great off-topic subject. Just because you're not into football doesn't mean you can't hang out and have a good time with those guys. I'm sure the topic won't always be about football.. Link to comment
Crazyaboutdogs Posted January 9, 2008 Share Posted January 9, 2008 When I lived in the US people at work were really into football (American Football). I knew nothing about it so I started learning...I watched some football games and actually enjoyed it. I don't watch it anymore but it at least helped me understand what everyone was talking about. If you already know you don't like it, why bother just to fit in. I am sure they talk about more than football...and I am sure they don't talk about football constantly. Just be yourself and don't force yourself to fake interest in something you have absolutely no interest in just to be in the in-crowd. Link to comment
HajiMaji Posted January 9, 2008 Share Posted January 9, 2008 If you dont like sports, then its ok. Eventually you will get to know these guys through other means. Something I have found in my own personality is that I am extremely agreeable and talkative. I dont like shopping for instance, but if I am in a situation similar to yours, I will give my two cents. I am never negative, but ill talk about the shoes they bought or whatever. I can even make jokes about how much i hate shopping. The key is that you project a non offensive attitude. Dont be judging about it at all. I respect people who love to shop. I think its fine. I probably hate it more than anything though. Its just a personal choice. Now, more specifically about sports, I dont know what australian football is, but I love sports. If you dont know anything about it and hate it as much as I hate shopping, I wouldnt really watch it. However, you can pick up on things that you know might come up.. Like if there is a big game you can find out who the winner was online and make fun of someone for liking the team who lost. Or you can watch highlights from the game online to talk about some of the crazy plays. A lot of the time everything worth watching is in the highlights so you can spend 5 minutes watching the internet and talk about stuff all day. Dont feel like you need to change who you are. You dont know these people so you can send any vibe you want. I'd send an agreeable vibe that doesnt really like football but appreciates people who do. Ask questions about it, make fun of people, but dont try and incorporate it in part of your life. If you are agreeable and open to casually engage in the conversation, then that breaks the ice pretty well without you having to do something horrible... like go shopping. Link to comment
Lucy_lou Posted January 9, 2008 Author Share Posted January 9, 2008 I like your advice Haji. Especially about making sure I appreciate people who are into sport even if I'm not, i.e. not being negative or judgemental. And about being agreeable. As a naturally argumentative person who likes a bit of confilct, that really is sound advice. thanks. (nice work jettison, that's me in the front looking suss). Link to comment
shikashika Posted January 9, 2008 Share Posted January 9, 2008 No. Don't pretend to like something you don't. i'm sure you have a million other things to start a conversation about thats about something you actually like! nothing wrong with learning more about it...but don't pretend to and then hate it. Link to comment
BeStrongBeHappy Posted January 9, 2008 Share Posted January 9, 2008 If the only thing people are able to talk about is football, we are all doomed! Some people are obsessed with it, but there's a whole world out there of things to talk about. Sometimes they talk about football like the weather (i.e., Warm out today isn't it?) as a conversation starter because they can't think of anything original. Even if someone opens with something about football, you can switch the conversation easily (isn't so & so's win great. hey, did you see ) to some other topic that is more interesting to you. I'd bet that lots of people would love a break from always talking about the same old thing. Link to comment
Zuzu2 Posted January 10, 2008 Share Posted January 10, 2008 I don't like sports and I don't pretend to like them to make friends. I can have fun watching the occasional football game at a someone's house but it's not something I really am into nor do I pretend to be. why fake who you are? Link to comment
DaDancingPsych Posted January 10, 2008 Share Posted January 10, 2008 Yes, it might be smart to follow the sport enough to hold a conversation. I don't really like American football, but I had a boss who really enjoyed it. I made it a point to watch the sports review in the morning to see who won the game and what the big plays were. It was enough information to discuss the game. My boss was aware that I wasn't a huge fan, but this gave us some common ground. Don't avoid your co-workers, because they enjoy this sport. I have no doubt that they have other interests, too and that you will soon find some common ground. Just talk to them and ask them questions. Link to comment
theartofruin Posted January 10, 2008 Share Posted January 10, 2008 Give it a go, but only because you may enjoy it. Not for other people. I'm a sports nut (football over here, & american football too) but I have a hell of a lot of friends who don't like sports. I have many interests outside of sport, so there's always something to talk about. If I want to chat about the weekend's results I'll go hang out with my housemates in the pub. If I want to have a chat about anything else, I'll search out other friends! Don't pretend to be someone you're not. You'll only be having boring conversations with boring two-dimensional people, instead of meeting and socialising with people more suited to you. Link to comment
Batya33 Posted January 10, 2008 Share Posted January 10, 2008 I would do the compromise position and learn just enough to be able to talk some about it. As a very wise relative of mine said - he hated football but was an exec in a major company so he would just say "great game!" if someone brought up the subject and that seemed to work reasonably well ;-) Link to comment
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