ImBurningStar

I really am just venting right now. Ok I've posted on here a few times about my problems with dating and rejection. I have tried all of the numerous advice that I have found here and it still ends in failure every time. Every time I meet someone new it always ends with the big f'ing "R"...REJECTION! I'm almost 22 years old and I've never had anything close to a relationship...hell I've never even taken a girl out on a date. I'm tired of always being the 5th wheel when I hang out with my friends because they all have girlsfriends/boyfriends who are always around. It's so depressing going out and being surrounded by couples. I've been single all my life and I don't want to be alone anymore. When it comes to girls I've expiernced nothing but hurt. People tell me don't worry about it and that things will work out. I honestly try not to worry about it but no matter what the pain just doesn't go away. I really just don't want to feel this way anymore. I want the pain to stop..... P.S. If you want more background on me you can read my other post

Its called sebacious prominence... completely normal. go to google and do an image search on "sebacious prominence" you'll see what it looks like

This is also known as sebacious prominence.... it is completely normal.

I made a post yesterday concerning some confidence issues of mine and trouble in my love life. I had been suggested a few times to fake confindence. I guess what I am getting at is, How do you fake having confidence???????? If you can just fake it then aren't you pretty much confident to begin with??? My biggest problem with meeting people is that I become shy when I try to start a conversation with someone. I become very nervous and then my mind goes blank and I don't know what to say... and then I ususaly end up making a fool out of myself by blurting out something idiotic that I would never say if I was thinking staight. I always end up in very uncomfortable silences. So can anyone please tell me: How do you fake confidence??? Guy's how do you initiate conversations with girls??? What do you talk about to keep things interesting and make her interested in you??? Girl's what do you like to talk about when a guy approaches you or you approach a guy??? What keep's it interesting for you and possibly makes you interested in someone?

I understand what everyone has been saying so far and I appreciate the comments. I don't have a problem walking up to someone... it's when I get there that things go down hill. When I was in Highschool I never had a problem making conversation with anyone. I went through a real tough situation that involved a a girl about two years ago. To keep this short I'm not going to get into details. Basically a friend of mine was trying to help me out because he knew I really liked this girl and i really thought things were going work out. To make a long story short.... the friend went behind my back started hooking up with her and asked her out and they started long relationship. I was left feeling very betrayed and unbelievably hurt. I've had a lot of trust issues with people since then and after that for some reason it's been very difficult for me to talk with people. I can go up to someone but for some reason I just draw a blank when it comes to starting conversation. I get very nervous and I just can't think of anything to say and become very quiet. I guess it might be some kind of subconsious thing or some type of social anxiety. It makes it very hard to meet new people. i really don't know what to do. All I ever here are good things about me. If people say I'm so great and would apparently make a great boyfriend who would make someone happy then why have I been rejected by every single person that I have ever tried to be with. I guess I'm just looking for ways to get conversation started, keep the conversation going, and tips for grabbing someone's interest.

Hi guys my name is Bill. I guess I''m just looking for advice, support or just any kind insight in general into my situation. I'm 21 years old and I have never had any kind of relationship with a girl. I have kissed a few girls but it's never gone further than that. I've never even taken a girl out on a date. It just seems now that I'm in my twenties and getting older I feel more and more empty inside with each passing day. I know it's not good to dwell on things but for some reason I can't stop thinking about it. This feeling of loneliness eats away at me more and more every day. Every girl that I have ever tried to be with has pushed me away in one way or another, or circumstances have prevented me from even getting a chance. I've been lied to, lead on, even people who I thought were my friends have made a move on a girl that I really liked when they knew I was interested. It hurt's so much having to deal with this day in and day out. It drives me nuts when I look back over the past couple years and all I see is one disappointment after another. What I don't get is that I've always been told by plenty of people (even the girls that have turned me away) that I'm a good looking guy, that I'm such a nice guy and a sweetheart, and that I'm going to make some girl so happy when I find her. If this really is the case then why is it that I can't even get a girl to be even interested in going out on at least one date with me? Why am I never even given a chance? It rips me apart inside trying to comprehend this. What has also made this more difficult is the fact that after getting hurt and rejected so many times I have become very shy when it comes to talking to girls or even anyone for that matter. I never used to be like that in high-school but I guess I just have a tendency to keep my guard up now because I'm afraid of getting hurt again. It sucks though because every time I try to have a conversation with a girl I become very nervous and I suddenly can't think of anything to say and the conversation turns into a giant uncomfortable silence. That's usually the point when i blow it and end up saying something idiotic that I would never even think of saying. I just don't know what to do anymore. All of my friends are in relationships so it's not like I have group of single people to hang out with. I always end up being the 5th wheel everywhere I go. If anyone can give me some advice or tips on talking to girls or just any dating advice in general it would be very much appreciated.

I didn't write it....it was forwarded to me and i posted it here.

A good friend of mine forwarded this to me a bit ago and I thought it would be a good read for all the guys out there like myself who have been in these situations, but i also think it can be very educational for the girls as well............so here is is. This is a tribute to the nice guys. The nice guys that finish last, that never become more than friends, that endure hours of whining and complaining about what jerks guys are, while disproving the very point. This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a shoulder to lean on but restrain themselves to tentative hugs, those guys who hold open doors and give reassuring pats on the back and sit patiently outside the changing room at department stores. This is in honor of the guys that obligingly reiterate how cute/beautiful/smart/funny/sexy their female friends are at the appropriate moment, because they know most girls need that litany of support. This is in honor of the guys with open minds, with laid-back attitudes, with honest concern. This is in honor of the guys who respect a girl's every facet, from her privacy to her theology to her clothing style. This is for the guys who escort their drunk, bewildered female friends back from parties and never take advantage once they're at her door, for the guys who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the rest of the creepy male population, for the guys who know a girl is fishing for compliments but give them out anyway, for the guys who always play by the rules in a game where the rules favor cheaters, for the guys who are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow don't end up being boyfriends, for all the nice guys who are overlooked, underestimated, and unappreciated, for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled, and unjustly abandoned, this is for you. This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on your cell phone, and when you called her back, she spent three hours painstakingly dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner. And even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and a jerk, you assured her that it was all ok and she shouldn't worry about it. This is for that time she interrupted the best killing spree you'd ever orchestrated in HALO 2 to rant about a rumor that romantically linked her and the guy she thinks is the most repulsive person in the world. And even though you thought it was immature and you had nothing against the guy, you paused the game for two hours and helped her concoct a counter-rumor to spread around the floor. This is also for that time she didn't have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing "serious" between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: "oh, but we're just friends!" And even though you were invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because you are nice like that. The nice guys don't often get credit where credit is due. And perhaps more disturbing, the nice guys don't seem to get laid as often as they should. And I wish I could logically explain this trend, but I can't. From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls go through a phase where they are illogical and manipulative. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as "oh, he's too nice to date" or "he would be a good boyfriend but he's not for me" or "he already puts up with so much from me, I couldn't possibly ask him out!" or the most frustrating of all: "no, it would ruin our friendship." Yet, they continue to lament the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I can't figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (I'm going to sleep with this complete jerk now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesn't last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single. So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know you're sick of hearing yourself described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of doors, your party escorting services, your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty smile. For all the crazy, inane, absurd things you tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my acknowledgement, and my gratitude go out to you. You do have credibility in this society, and your well deserved vindication is coming.

I understand where you guys are coming from. When I said these things to her though I wasn't expecting it to turn into anything and she knew and acknowledged that fact. I was just getting something off of my chest that I have been holding inside for so long and she had know problem with that because we both care about each other very much as friends and we have always been open with each other. If it wasn't for our conversation being overheard her boyfriend wouldn't have known that anything had been said. It just really sucks because it's impossible for him to understand that. It doesn't matter to him even though he knows that when this all began he was the person who was supposed to be a friend to me but instead stabbed me in the back. It doesn't matter to him that as hurt as i was I let it go so she could be happy. Now he is keeping me from the closest friend that I have ever had because of words that he was never meant to hear.

Hi Everyone, I find myself stuck in a huge dilemma and I don't know what to do. I apologize now if the post ends up being really long but there is a lot that needs to be said. I guess I'll just start from the beginning. There is this girl (I'll call her Jen) who I have been very close friends with for a number of years. About two years ago my feelings for her started to go beyond just wanting to be friends. As long as we have been friends we have always been able to talk about anything with each other and we are always there for each other if one of us needs someone to talk too. We know things about each other that to this day nobody else in the world knows. Now around the time I started to feel this way about Jen we were both hanging out with different crowds of people, but I had started calling her a lot more when I was going to parties with my other friends and inviting her along. Everybody knew that I was crazy about her except for her because I guess i was just afraid of what her reaction would be when I told her how I felt. This fear would prove to come back and kick me right in the ass. We were at a party at one of my friends house getting drunk and I walked into the living room of the house only to find a really good friend of mine( I'll call him John) hooking up with her. It literally felt like my heart was exploding in my chest. I couldn't believe what I was seeing...he of all people knew how I felt about her and there he was holding her and kissing her. I felt so betrayed and I just left the party with out telling anyone and went home. Over The next few days i confided in some of my other friends about how I should handle the situation. They agreed that what happened to me was really f#@ked up. At the same time Jen had also called me to talk about John and how much she liked him and wanted to start dating (Keep in mind she didn't know how I felt about her so it's not like she was rubbing it in). I eventually got a call from John and he wanted to talk about what had happened. As angry as i was at him at some point on the way to talk to him I decided that I was going to tell him that I wouldn't have a problem with it if he went out with her. The only reason I decided this was because she sounded so happy talking about him and I didn't want to potentially destroy that and hurt her. So as hard as it was, me and him talked and i told him I was cool with everything. After me and him had our conversation I got a call from her because she heard from one of her friends that i was upset about what had happened. I told her that I just want her to be happy and if you want to be with him then you should be with him. At this point as much as I felt hurt I just figured that in time I would be able to move on. Unfortunately that wasn't the case. Every time I saw them together it felt like there was a dagger being shoved into my chest. I began to regret how i handled the situation, but at this point there was nothing I could do. Over time I had met a few girls that I had an interest in but in the end each and every one of them had rejected me. This just made things really hard because I started to feel really lonely and unwanted. It's even harder because I have been trapped in this lie of pretending I'm ok with John and Jen being together when in reality every time I see her I just want to hold her close to me. Now this brings us up to around present day and recently John and Jen have been having a lot of relationship troubles. He hasn't been treating her all that great and she has been really upset. She calls me all the time wanting someone to talk to and being the friend that I have always been of course I'm there to listen. She crys about how much she feels hurt by the way he is treating her but at the same time she still loves him very much. Throught all of these conversations I have always put my feelings aside and told her to do what ever she feels will make her happy. That is until this past weekend. John was working late so me, Jen and one of our other friends went out to a local bar. It got to around last call and me and Jen went outside while our friend was paying his tab. She started to get upset thinking about things and i broke down and opened up to her and told her everything that I was feeling presently and what it's been like the past year and a half. She said she knew that I still had feelings for her but didn't know what to do right now. Now here comes the big dilemma. The friend we came to the bar with was near the door when I started saying these things to her and he heard everything. The next day he went and told John and now John is furious. He told her that she is not allowed to talk to me and If I call her she is not allowed to answer. Everything is completely screwed up and i don't know what to do. I know that i was crossing a line by saying what I said to her, but i have been holding it in for so long and couldn't help it. I just can't believe that this is happening. John wouldn't even know her if it wasn't for me and on top of that he stabbed me in the back when he got with her and now he saying i can't even speak to her when she is one of my closest friends. I feel so conflicted and i don't know what to do. I need help desperately.

Dude your best bet is to just trim the hairs that are actually on your ball sack itself with scissors. The skin down there is so losse you pose the risk of cutting yourself very badly with a razor. Now you can shave all of the other hair down there like your inner thigh and around your penis, but I still recomend that you trim down very short any hair that you are going to shave off. Don't forget to use some kind of soap or shaving cream to avoid burns.

I guess I'm just looking for some guidance or insight. I am a 21 year old guy who has never had a girlfriend or even taken a girl out on a date. Every girl that I have ever tried to be with has turned me away and I don't know what I'm doing wrong. I'm told by my friends and even the girls that have pushed me away that I'm not a bad looking guy and everyone is always telling me about how nice of a guy I am. What adds to my confusion even more is that I have been told so many times about how lucky some girl is going to be to have me and how when I find someone I am going to make her so happy. If I am so great then why am I always being rejected? It hurts so much when I hear a girl tell me something like that and then she says "no" when I ask her out. It's even worse when after that I see them end up with some a-hole who treats them like sh!t and then they want to come to me to talk when their jerk makes them feel bad because I apparently "Understand" how they're feeling. It's things like this that have me so stressed out and even depressed. I am so lonely and I feel so unwanted and nobody I know has any advice to give. None of my friends really understand my situation because they are all in relationships and they have all been dating since high-school while I have been struggling time after time with every girl I meet. If anyone has any thoughts or advice on my situation it would really be appreciated.