Voyager2005

If a "never married" girl is who he wants then there's no way to force him to love you. But sometimes people have prejudice about a person over a single thing, in this case, your divorce. Try to tell him about what happen in your previous marriage and what went wrong at appropriate times. Let him understand why you divorced. You need to do a lot of talking between yourselves. Don't go to far before you guys know each other more. Him having this reaction to your past might reflects a fundamental difference between you and him. Don't become intimate too fast otherwise you'll end up hurting yourself. Best wishes.

I also wonder which culture is he from. I grew up in Asia and moved to europe later on. I do think asians are in gerneral more shy than europeans and americans in their attitude towards relationships. I personally still retain some of this shyness but consider myself more open than most of the people from my country. Usually an asian would be even more shy towards a western woman than one from his own culture. Don't ask me why, it's just the case. But if you feel that he's interested in you then it's def a good sign. The ways I suggest to approach him is to for example casually ask to have a coffee with him after work. During your conversation ask him what he thinks about inter-cultural relationships, and whether he finds woman from other cultures more attractive or from his culture. If he's smart enough, he'll use this chance to project his feeling for you in an "objective" view of this topic. If he leans heavily on the side of "why-not", and find "more attractive" it's a lucky strike, cuz usually in asian cultures inter-culture relationship and marriage is still rare and some-what controversial. Say the name of all the countries you can think of, one by one, and ask him if he finds the woman attractive. Pay attention if he tries to diminish the woman from the other cultures apart from yours. Touching him sometimes during your conversation will send him to heaven. Try getting physical close to him like that. Though he's shy, he's still a man. I bet he'll go home and think about you... good luck.. let us know how you get on..

Hi I need you guys who have been in the similar situation to give me advice. I've gone out with this girl for 6 months. She has a nice personality and I feel comfortable being around her. But perhaps the only thing that gives me doubts from time to time (since before we went out) is whether I'm physically attracted to her enough. Especially, when I walk on the street seeing other girls I can't stop thinking, that's the look I like. The relationship we have now I wouldn't describe it as passionate. I don't feel being madly in love. But what is love? This is a question perhaps no body knows. But one thing I do know is, if I keep having this doubt in my mind our relationship will deteriorate... maybe in the end becomes disasterous. So I need to convince myself, that there is nothing to doubt, or otherwise break up while it's still easy. But it won't be easy for me at all, cuz I'm afraid of hurting women, but my last relationship lasted much longer than it's supposed to because of this, resulting in many unnessecary arguments. I know in a relationship doubts happen from time to time, and many who get through have wonderful lifes. Which is why I'm really lost. I don't want to just give up, but then I don't want to insist on something impossible. Maybe the same doubt will come again and again, say, when I see a pretty girl,etc. Suppose I want to break up, how should I say it without damaging her self-esteem? thanks

Just would like to ask what's your usual way(s) of flirting with a girl (eye contact, body touching, or words..etc), or letting her know that you are attracted to her, in a way that she's likely to accept, and, like.. after doing it you still maintain the coolness.

Yes, maybe you're right. Perhaps being a coward to say "I don't actually love you, let's be friends" is the best way to decribe me then saying that I don't want to hurt women. As to whether she ever turned my head around, I would say no. I think she was more attracted to me than me to her at the beginning, and this gave us a push to become gf/bf. I was content with our relationship being that way until now - the reason being the time factor (or the dwindling factor) and I now have more time to think about us.

Hi, I've gone out with this girl for 6 months. She has a nice personality and I feel comfortable being around her. But perhaps the only thing that gives me doubts from time to time (since before we went out) is whether I'm physically attracted to her enough. Especially, when I walk on the street seeing other girls I can't stop thinking, that's the look I like. The relationship we have now I wouldn't describe it as passionate. I don't feel being madly in love. But what is love? This is a question perhaps no body knows. But one thing I do know is, if I keep having this doubt in my mind our relationship will deteriorate... maybe in the end becomes disasterous. So I need to convince myself, that there is nothing to doubt, or otherwise break up while it's still easy. But it won't be easy for me at all, cuz I'm afraid of hurting women, but my last relationship lasted much longer than it's supposed to because of this, resulting in many unnessecary arguments. I know in a relationship doubts happen from time to time, and many who get through have wonderful lifes. Which is why I'm really lost. I don't want to just give up, but then I don't want to insist on something impossible. Maybe the same doubt will come again and again, say, when I see a pretty girl,etc. Would love to hear some advices or your experiences.