My wife and I are currently separated do to emotional exhaust. She wants me to change in order to get back together. She is needing more from me and I realize now how complicated she is and dont really know if I can give her the level of love she needs. She is very emotionally driven and has harmonal issues. I feel depressed with her and dont really know if I want to change for her because im care free and easy going. I dont want to be in such a depressing relationship. She has issues as do I but dont know what to do because she is a great person and a good lover but with much baggage. This I didnt know before we got married, or atleast I thought would workout with communication and possibly kids. So far after 3 endometrious surgerys, she is unable to bare kids. I believe this amoung being a only child from a single mother and an emotional abusive deadbeat chastised father has ruined her for me.
My problem has been multiplied by one of my employees. I along with my family have a business in which i am the boss of the office. My married employee has become open to me and we have grown close. She is in a relatively new marriage and is unhappy with his lack in desire for children. On top of being a complete moron and a serious idiot.(not just my opinion) We have communicated that men and women cannot be just friends and we both acknowledge how good of a match we would have been if circumstances were different. We know have started flirting and talking mess to each other. We also wouldnt want to leave our relationships unless one was waiting at the door.
I know it is un professional, immoral, unethical and illegal. There has been no contact other that the feel of here hair. She is what I want in a relationship as am I for her. We are involved emotionally to just a fun playful level, but I am fearful that I may think with the wrong head and slip. I dont know what to do, I want things to work out with my wife as do I want things to work out for my employee. But the feelings I have for here serious and consuming. I have been advised to not have relations with any of my employees and respect that, but I feel she might be my best friend or soulmate lover. Am I just lost and hoping for something better or am I happy because she is the half I always wanted???????