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Dear ScaryPerson, I know it is easier said than done but the world is a beautiful place with lots of wonderful people. Let us look at it this way, Think that you happened to encounter the bad people first and life has reserved the good people and the good times in future for you. Highschool is a tough experience for most people and yes, they do get through.Develop some more self-confidence and you first have to like yourself and feel good about yourself.That, believe me is the best way to get others to like you.If they don't, just think that they've lost their opportunity to know a wonderful person such as you! As to the stepfather issue that is a traumatic one.You say you are 16. The only thing I can say is this : Focus on how to make yourself a success.If you are still in school place all your attention on success in your career.Get a part-time job or do something that you love and makes you feel good about yourself. From what you write I understand that these experiences have hampered the ability to trust people.That is ok.As you meet new peoplein life in adult hood who love and respect you for who you are things will improve. Remember No one is a failure.And the world has a place for everyone. And the world is not such a bad place. You say you are 16 so there is so much more in life left to live and love.So Just Go out there and take on the challenges and challengers.

Thanks to all those who responded.Nice to know that there are people who have had similar experiences. I think wishmistress has a good pointt.I would definitely not like to use labels or other women like catty.As for shes2smart no I didn't have any brothers and I am equally close to both parents.There goes another stereotype. Anyway my husband and I are comfortable with who I am and this is purely a social concern for me.And Yes I generally stay away from most parties except for a at few friends where I can be myself.To make small talk with things like 'Nice dress' or 'ooh aah over Lovely Diamonds' takes me a lot of effort as it just does not come naturally.The lack of shared experiences and hence a lack of conversation is what makes me uncomfortable.I do try to get talk to some of the other women about their work or books or something generic but they do tend to gravitate towards other stuff.Finally I end up trying to say some artificial lines about 'Nice this', 'Recipe for that', and all is well.I come back and I hate myself for not being able to be who I am.Not a big deal.Can live with it though! Anyway Everytime I see stereotyped stuff all over the internet examples: articles on MSN - like the chick flicks,dumb blonde, the idea that all techno geeks are male, attribution of gender to human qualities, assuming that there is something called a masculine side and feminine side, having rigid dichotomies about gender - all these external things bother me the most. Anyway thanks to this forum for an opportunity to vent

I am a straight married female and have this excruciating problem. I find that I am extremely uncomfortable around women and particularly in all-female company.I feel very different from them and seem like a big misfit.The way they think,they talk and the things that interests a majority of them do not interest me.Please understand that I am not stereotyping female behaviour but this has become a big social heartburn for me.I love sports,electronics,am a little bit of geek,don't like to wear dresses,loathee discussions on jewellery or clothing and avoid shopping and cleaning as much as possible and listen more than I talk.I also have some periodic not persistent or strong loathing towards my assigned gender in that I am angry with God for women having to put up with menstruation and pregnancy and the men getting away with no effort. I have a lot of male friends with whom I get along wonderfully well and have a lot of fun.They talk to me freely about their relationship issues and have always been one of the boys. The worst part of this is that in most of the parties I attend the genders somehow tend to get segregated and I end up getting all worked up about attending one of these parties. So What does this make me ? Am I transgendered? Or just different? Any one else had a similar experience ?