Trulyhonest

I acted exactly the way you are acting when I was 17....and you know what my problem was? I had no self-respect. Now don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to attack you, but honeslty this was my experience. I'm now almost 21 years old, and I can look back on how I acted at that age (even though it was only a few years ago) and just laugh at how much bull**** i put up with when it came to guys. They knew they could walk all over me and I let them.....the first thing you should do is establish some major standards for yourself and take nothing less!

I would never cheat on anyone and i would never let anyone cheat WITH me. We did not touch eachother until long after they broke up. I honestly don't suspect anything between the two of them because they were together for a year (almost to the day of me and my ex's 1 year) and he tells me all the time how horrible it was. She would drag him to David's Bridal and was planning the day he would propose, all his friends hated her, and most of all he didn't like the fact about how...ahemmm...around the block she had been before they were together. I did not act inappropriate in anyway when they were together, so I don't think i "deserve" any karma in return. I was together with my ex for the exact amount of time, but he did cheat on me, and we have yet to speak for almost 5 months now, but honestly, if i knew it would upset my bf...i wouldnt do it.

ok I'll start from the beginning....I broke up with my boyfriend of a year last May because he had cheated on me and I met my current boyfriend in June. He had a girlfriend at the time, but they were definitly on the way out. We came from very similiar situations because we were(was) in long distance relationships with very controlling and manipulating people. We became very good friends and practically spent the whole summer together and got pretty close. Him and his gf broke up in July, and we continued to hang out constantly. His ex is a bit of a psycho and she called him everyday almost 3 or 4 times a day after the broke up for 2 or 3 months *****ing him out and crying and such.... It was late September when we decided that we really had something and we made it official. She continued to call until she secretly went under a friends screename and found out about me. She was beyond furious and told him she never wanted to speak to him again. Things were great for a few weeks until she started emailing him every so often. Now just recently i found out its gotten to be everyday. He says they're harmless emails and he responds without even thinking and that he didn't even realize that it was that often....but now they're talking online all the time. I trust my bf compleatly, but this girl is obnoxious and admits she's still fully in love with him and she talks to him about her interactions with other guys, and asks him advice about sex and I just think its all very inappropriate. I've told him it really upsets me, but i would never tell him to not speak with someone just because of me, but I feel like he should know better. I'm not sure how i should deal with this... any advice?

I'm happy to say that I finally made up my mind on friday and told him it was over and that there was no chance in hell I'd take him back. He still called like 30 times a day for about 4 or 5 days, but I restrained myself from answering. I finally have a clear head and can realize that I could do so much better....that I could find someone who would treat me great and NOT cheat on me. I drowned myself with activities and all my friends which was mostly why I could make this decision. Thanks for the advice guys.

Question: I was just honestly wondering if anyone out there would sleep with someone knowing that the person had a girlfriend/boyfriend....

I still don't know what I'm doing. I've asked him why he did it, but all he says is that he doesn't know and that he know he messed up so bad and he doesn't want to lose me in his life. I have not seem him since but i'm still talking to him on the phone....whether or not this is a good thing...I don't know. I don't know what to tell him anymore...sorry doesn't cut it. He wants to know what he can do to prove to me that he's serious and that he'll do anything for me...I just don't know what to tell him.

I really think you look at cheating compleatly differently if you are cheated on. I myself found out about 2 weeks ago that my boyfriend of a year cheated on me. I think their are different ranks of cheating. A kiss is one thing, making out is another and having sex with someone else is in a whole different catagory. I think when u find out u have every right to be pissed and yell and get out everything u need to if the cheating went to the extent of sleeping with someone else....how is their an excuse for it? what you slipped and fell? and being drunk is not an excuse....you still have morals when ur drunk, whether or not u think of the consequences of your actions. I mean you have all the time in the world to think about what ur doing and just as my EX-boyfriend did....but he didn't think about what would happen when he did this. I don't think you can fully say if you'll forgive or not until ur actually in the situation. I honestly think u can be sorry, but your most likely only sorry cuz u got caught and ur losing someone who u supposedly love.

Well here I go... I found out about a week ago from my boyfriend's best friend that my boyfriend of a year had cheated on me about 2 months ago. I confronted him on it and he denied it for hours, but finally confessed. He pleaded and pleaded with me telling me that he made the biggest mistake of his life and that he loves me so much. I broke up with him immediately in anger, but he continued to call and text me telling me that he'd do anything to get me back. I was so in love with him (and still am) and I don't know what to do. He lived an hour and a half away but we saw eachother every weekend. This was that last thing I would expect from him since his prior girlfriend of 3 years had cheated on him and we had talked about how much that effected him and hurt him. At the time he cheated, we were having some problems, but we had gradually fixed them and were doing great when I found this out. My friends and family, especially my brother are just in awe that I would even consider taking him back. I don't want to lose their respect or my own self-respect by doing this. and I'm not even sure I can do this. It's been about a week and a half and he is still incessantly calling and telling me that he loves me and that he needs me in his life, but I have yet to verbally recipricate any of those feelings. I am so hurt that someone who says he loves me and cares about me could do this because no matter how hard the relatonship got....this was never an option for me. How do i build trust from none? What can I do?