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Thread: What do I do next?

  1. #1

    Join Date
    Feb 2019
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    What do I do next?

    So about six years ago I met this girl at a get together with friends from work. I winded up getting her number and texted her on and off.
    I took her out here and there on dates and we got to know each other pretty slowly. It wasn't planned it just kinda happened that way.
    A year later we got real close almost to the point of being together sorta but we both were extremely angry at our pasts situations with significant others
    before we got together and that made us take our anger out on each other. It wasn't bad but we would try to hurt each others feelings verbally. Days would go
    by and she'd come back and talk to me about what happen to reconcile which caught me off guard because I've never had a girl do that before. Normally it
    would just be us not messing with each other or the girl holding a grudge. This time I was the one holding a grudge making things worse.
    As time went on we both kept having disagreements and I'd act like I didn't care eventually pushing her away.

    I got to a point in my life where I got really depressed and locked myself in my room for a week. Soon after I decided to go to therapy to seek help.
    I messaged her a few times here and there but overall I pretty much took a step back and she started talking to someone else. I was hurt about it but
    I knew I needed to get help so I focused on that. After a few months I moved back home and started my life over.
    I started working on myself setting up my business and dealing with unresolved issues that I never really dealt with before.
    I still would sporadically hit her up here and there but I kept my distance because I think she was talking to someone and
    didn't want to cause any confusion.

    After three years I got back in touch with her mid 2018. I'm no longer in the same city I'm 3 hours away now so I just
    can't go see her like that so I've only been texting and she's single now, but I'm unsure what to really do next.
    I know she's busy and has a lot on her plate. She responds to me 80% of the time but never initiates. I asked her if I made her uncomfortable and she said
    no. I've opened up to her alot, not as much as I could but more than before.
    I let her know how I felt about her which is me wanting to continue to get to know her again. I even asked her out casually and she said yes.
    I still do have feelings for her but I don't want to really go down that road yet cause it's been so long and I don't think that's appropriate so most
    of me telling her how I feel has been on reconnecting. But I don't know how she feels about me though.
    She hasn't I guess friendzoned me but idk if she likes me that way. If she doesn't then cool I don't mind being friends with her.
    She treats me differently than any other guy she knows in general tho. It's always been that way. Even before. Idk she could be jumping around with others
    but with me it's like her approach is different.
    I don't know if she has her guard up and feels like I'm going to hurt her like before. I really hope not. I've asked about the past she says we're good. I don't know if I should be the annoying person who calls a lot since she's busy. She told me I don't bother her. Maybe I'm just in my head
    too much on the situation. I've tried to ask for advice from others but to no avail. I've been told from "if you not hitting the why you tripping" and
    "just go down there and marry her" There's no in-between with anyone. Causing me confusion. Idk if what I'm doing is right or wrong so I'm kinda questioning my every move. Like how do I progress from the area I'm in now without overdoing it or not doing enough.

  2. #2
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Apr 2016
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    With all the remarkable changes and improvements you've made in your life, it may be better to start fresh with new local girls than backtrack into a known unhealthy nonviable situation.

    Get on some dating apps with a well written profile and good recent pics and start messaging local women and meeting them asap for a low key coffee until you meet someone you want to pursue further.
    Originally Posted by Cr302
    I got to a point in my life where I got really depressed and locked myself in my room for a week. Soon after I decided to go to therapy to seek help.I knew I needed to get help so I focused on that. After a few months I moved back home and started my life over. I started working on myself setting up my business and dealing with unresolved issues that I never really dealt with before.


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