Bob789 Posted December 2, 2018 Share Posted December 2, 2018 Hi my girlfriend and I broke up 5 months ago. She text / missed called me about 5 times. This happened a few weeks ago to say she wants to meet up, is sorry for everything and misses me. So I call her a few hours after these texts to see what's happening she said she been in a bad place etc... but don't worry. So what does this mean? Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted December 2, 2018 Share Posted December 2, 2018 Sorry this is happening. How long were you dating? What was the breakup about? Did you decide to stay in touch/stay "friends" after the breakup? Did she just get dumped by someone? Does she want a shoulder to cry on? Does she have problems with mental illness or drugs/drinking? Are you hoping to get back together? What is your incentive for continued contact?my girlfriend and I broke up 5 months ago. She text / missed called me about 5 times. she said she been in a bad place etc... but don't worry. Link to comment
MissCanuck Posted December 2, 2018 Share Posted December 2, 2018 We need a lot more context, OP. It would be helpful if you can answer Wiseman's questions. Link to comment
NeedWisdom Posted December 2, 2018 Share Posted December 2, 2018 She misses you and is confused at the same time -- pretty normal. Try asking her for a date, OP. Link to comment
Bob789 Posted December 2, 2018 Author Share Posted December 2, 2018 Hi thankyou for the replys basically we both ended it after a few weeks of disagreements. She seems to text and call me every few weeks then goes cold. We have been together for 6 years almost 7, apart for 5 months. Never broke up before. I have tried several times in the beginning to get back together but didn't so after reading loads of stuff online I decided to let her do the contacting. Link to comment
Bob789 Posted December 3, 2018 Author Share Posted December 3, 2018 What does anyone recommend doing? Link to comment
MissCanuck Posted December 3, 2018 Share Posted December 3, 2018 What was causing the disagreements that led to the break-up? Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted December 3, 2018 Share Posted December 3, 2018 No contact. No contact. No contact. Delete and block. Move on and date women who didn't dump you.What does anyone recommend doing? Link to comment
Bob789 Posted December 3, 2018 Author Share Posted December 3, 2018 Well her family said I wasn't committed enough. I was there for her for 7 years.lol. So I don't understand. That's what caused the arguments. Was planning on moving out and getting engaged to her on her birthday. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted December 3, 2018 Share Posted December 3, 2018 It seems after that long she was expecting more from you. Many breakups, sadly, result from a case of "a little too little, a little too late". In the meantime stay no contact and heal and reflect.Well her family said I wasn't committed enough. I was there for her for 7 years. That's what caused the arguments. Was planning on moving out and getting engaged to her on her birthday. Link to comment
Bob789 Posted December 3, 2018 Author Share Posted December 3, 2018 Do you think there is a chance to get back together? I think her dad put that idea in her head or should I go around there and sort him out.lol. Link to comment
Hollyj Posted December 3, 2018 Share Posted December 3, 2018 I would have been done, too. Seven years! Why didn't you propose sooner? Link to comment
Bob789 Posted December 3, 2018 Author Share Posted December 3, 2018 Hi was almost 7 years. Well I'm only 32 and she's 27. I was planning to do this on her birthday was going to make it a surprise. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted December 3, 2018 Share Posted December 3, 2018 Sure if on top of a breakup and friendzoning you want to add restraining order to the list of heartaches and headaches. I think her dad put that idea in her head or should I go around there and sort him out.lol. Link to comment
Hollyj Posted December 3, 2018 Share Posted December 3, 2018 You should have done it five years ago. Link to comment
Bob789 Posted December 3, 2018 Author Share Posted December 3, 2018 I don't see where I have been friendzoned. She text me about meeting up, misses me, wants to talk and is sorry as she has been in a bad place. Also I don't know many successful relationships that have gotten engaged before 2 years, usually takes longer for that. Link to comment
Hollyj Posted December 3, 2018 Share Posted December 3, 2018 I said at the two year mark is when you address this, not before. Seven years is ridiculous Link to comment
mustlovedogs Posted December 3, 2018 Share Posted December 3, 2018 I said at the two year mark is when you address this, not before. Seven years is ridiculous I kind of disagree, they may have felt young then, but I guarantee this wasn’t a surprise. Had she talked to you about it before the breakup? Link to comment
Bob789 Posted December 3, 2018 Author Share Posted December 3, 2018 She did not mention anything like that just her dad said our relationship was lacking commitment and this rubbed off onto her. If I was always there for her I don't know where there is a lack of commitment. Link to comment
mustlovedogs Posted December 4, 2018 Share Posted December 4, 2018 She did not mention anything like that just her dad said our relationship was lacking commitment and this rubbed off onto her. If I was always there for her I don't know where there is a lack of commitment. So did she talk about the lack of commitment to you? Why decide to propose now? Link to comment
Hollyj Posted December 4, 2018 Share Posted December 4, 2018 She did not mention anything like that just her dad said our relationship was lacking commitment and this rubbed off onto her. If I was always there for her I don't know where there is a lack of commitment. Commitment as in marriage. It dos not sound like the tow of you communicate, at all. Link to comment
Bob789 Posted December 4, 2018 Author Share Posted December 4, 2018 Yes she did and I tried to change it up. I was planning on proposing before any of this happened. I didn't mention this to anyone as I wanted it to be a surprise on her birthday. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted December 4, 2018 Share Posted December 4, 2018 She and her family are correct. A little too little, a little to late. At 27 she and her family may have discussed that your relationship was going nowhere if she wants kids, marriage etc. You snooze, you lose. "Planning on" is not doing. And "planning on" is like closing the barn door after the horses have escaped. I was planning on .... Link to comment
Bob789 Posted December 5, 2018 Author Share Posted December 5, 2018 I know lots of couples that have been together for ages before marriage. This is not answering my original question which is why would she be calling/ texting me saying she wants to meet up, is sorry for everything and misses me? Link to comment
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