Broke up after three days into LD

Hello everyone

i am trying to recover from a heartbreaking breakup. I have some questions and hope to get answers to help me move on.

My ex and I broke up during the heat of an argument about two months ago. I was really insecure in long distance and freaked out. We were both very emotional from stress and were not thinking things rationally.

Everything was great right before we broke up. People say the love and passion usually gradually fade away before a relationship ends. However, we had the greatest time right before we started long distance. Of course we had issues and problems in our relationship (mainly communication and insecurity). But honestly, I didn't see any signs of breakup before it actually happened. We would tell each other I love you everyday and talk about marriage. We cried when I packed, etc.

The fact is I am a foreigner in his country and I had to leave since my new visa is still pending, meaning I don't even know if I will go back again.

He has his career, property and everything in the city he lives in now. He's in a very difficult and stressful stage of life now. He told me many times before I left that he wished he could just leave everything behind and run away with me.

We only exchanged some emails after breakup. He told me he's really tired of arguing with me and didn't want to play games anymore but still cares about me and misses me a lot and he only wants to be with me and no one else. He lives in the house which we painted and organized together and everything reminds him of me. This relationship has tormented him to a point that he doesn't want to get involved in any other relationships anymore and has decided to stay celibate.

I told him many times that I want to get back together and ask him to reconcile. He never responds to me in that regard. He emphasized that I was the one who initiated the breakup, he was only complying as I wished.

I know it probably sounds unrealistic to ask to reconcile not knowing if I will ever get back to his country. I just realize how much I love him and don't want to lose him..

I just can't seem to let go and move on. And honestly don't know what to do. I haven't heard from him for three weeks and started feeling desperate...

Any input will be appreciated.

It would help to know your ages, what countries you're both from, whether you both work, and exactly what kind of arguments you've been having. Otherwise I would say he has something else going on in his life and something has happened to make him not wanting to continue the relationship. You should probably give up on him.

It would help to know your ages, what countries you're both from, whether you both work, and exactly what kind of arguments you've been having. Otherwise I would say he has something else going on in his life and something has happened to make him not wanting to continue the relationship. You should probably give up on him.

We are both in our 30s. We live and have steady jobs in CA.

I was the one who initiated breakup because I felt he didnt care much about me for some reason. I was the clingy one in this relationship and constantly felt insecure without him around. I actually mentioned breakup several times but we still stayed together until our last argument.

He sounded really sad and in pain in his emails. I told him many times that I wanted to improve myself and reconcile. I really learned my lesson. I just don't know if he still wants to be with me, especially we are thousands of miles apart from each other.

Well, it sounds like depression then. There's nothing you can do from where you are. Unless he marries you and gets you back to the US, that's probably the end of it. The depression might clear a bit in the future and he could wake up wanting you back, but depression can take a long time to clear unless he seeks help. As I said, I don't think there's anything you can do.