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My mom trying to pick clothes for me


Chocolate25

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I'm tired of my mom trying to control the clothes I wear. I don't want her picking my clothes. I'm 26. It's so embarrassing. I miss it when I used to go clothes shopping with my friends from college. After I dropped my mom off to target, I was about to get into a car crash. I was so frustrated and almost lost my temper. I'm feeling a bit temperamental. My best friends don't seem to be understanding. They think my mom is doing what's best for me. After the first time my mom tried picking clothes for me, I got mad and put those clothes away. She tries to pick clothes for me the second time around. I'm frankly sick of it. I'm at the stage where I want to do my own clothes shopping and pick styles that go best with myself.

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i'm sorry to ask the uncomfortable question- how come you don't buy your own? do you financially support yourself, at least to a significant degree if not entirely?

 

have you told and shown her what styles you like? most importantly, never ever be rude or impatient or snide when gifted anything.

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Chock, you have a thread history with a significant amount of dissatisfaction with your controlling family. you don't really comment when it's suggested you'd be a smart cookie to live on your own first possible chance.

 

controlling parents can have the effect of making their child scared of and inefficient at individuation.

 

i think avoiding this issue until now has not helped you, as your frustration is rising. i'm afraid you won't get a solution if you're not open to an exploration of the difficulties you're having with independence.

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My family is very conservative and Indian. I've been coddled most of my life. I feel as though i need to develop my independence. My mom asked me " what more do you want from life since our family is rich?" Since my family is rich, do you think it's best for me to try to become more independent from parents? I didn't realize that money can't buy you the friends you want. I feel insecure about myself from time to time. My mom does my laundry and cooking. She means well. My bro in law said "in order to get better common sense, you have to get yourself other there in the world... Mommy can't protect from the world for the rest of your life... Etc" I also struggled socially in life. I struggled with dating. Also I feel like blaming my parents for sheltering me a lot from the world. I feel so dumb sometimes.

 

okay so maybe your mother shows affection with material things. learn to accept gestures from people who have trouble giving abstract and emotional gifts. do your dishes and laundry for certain, they're not forbidding you that i'm sure.

 

interestingly enough, you say you thought money comes on a silver platter, and you seem to still be taking material things for granted. a really good cure for that is declining your family's financial support kindly, and forcing yourself to survive on your own.

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