Current&Ex's and dreams in between

So here it goes...

The past couple of weeks I have been having dreams, weird dreams. I always end up catching my boyfriend cheating on me with another girl(no one in particular just a faceless person) and I get pissed at him and leave and always go running back or threaten to run back to this guy named Eric.

The real life story with Eric is this. We dated years and years ago in like middle school. About a year ago he found me on the oh how mighty myspace and we started talking again when he got back from Iraq. He was in California, I was in VA. He had a girlfriend at the time and I was single at the time. We really started to like one another again basically through a phone even though neither would admit it because he did have a girlfriend and I honestly had respect for her. Then their relationship got rocky and he wanted to move back here to VA and was supposed to come stay at my apartment for awhile until he could get grounded here. Well the Saturday I was supposed to pick him up from the airport he never showed. By this point his cell and internet had gotten turned off, so I just gave up on him really. Well I meet Jason which is my current boyfriend now and we started dating. About a month and a half after we started dating guess who shows up in VA?? Eric!! Him and his girlfriend broke up so he flew back here, but now I had a boyfriend. He was totally respectful of it and we rarely hang out but still talk every couple of months or so just due to the fact, I know deep inside I don't want to let him go. I know it is bad to say but it is almost like he is my backup plan. Jason hates Eric.

But it is just weird that I keep having basically the same dream over and over again. Eric is never actually in my dream, I just always threaten to leave Jason for him and so forth.

I have kind of felt torn between the two of them since Eric came back into town because we do have such a strong bond. But I love Jason and I want it to work and I know I need to forget Eric but it is honestly hard. The first night Eric and I hung out when he got back into town I wanted nothing more than to kiss him to be honest. Now that feeling has gone away but I still feel guilty for even thinking it. I know that Jason and my relationship was at the very early stages of a little over a month at that time and I def did not feel as strongly about him then as I do now. I am being selfish...I know this

I also want to add..I don't think my boyfriend is cheating on me at all, I know I am his one and only right now and how much he loves me..