3 Months Ago

My ex broke up with me 3 months ago today and it really has been a journey. I did the NC thing and then did LC and then eventually had to say f*** it.

At first I was really torn up. I tried my best to keep my chin up and continue living my life but I just couldn't fill that empty space. I looked for every answer in the book to figure out how to get her back. I spent most of my days reading these and other forums and watching youtube videos of "relationship coaches". Yes it all sounds and is ridiculous but this is what I did. All the while I kept NC for about a month and a half. I would call this phase 1.

After I realized that she wasn't attempting to call or text me I decided that I needed to reach out. I didn't want her to just fade away and I figured if I wanted to reconcile then I needed to be a bit more proactive. So I contacted her via text. We talked back and forth but nothing ever really came of it. When I would bring up old memories or something that was a moment we shared, she would not acknowledge any of it. Eventually I found out that she was seeing someone else... not from her telling me of course. I continued texting and really my ultimate goal was to meet with her once and for all. Let's call it phase 2.

So at this point my mind had mislead me into excitement because she agreed to meet with me in person. But I soon got the point when she was stringing me along even more and avoiding the meeting saying she couldn't do it then... but maybe then... but then cancel. She couldn't give me one little meeting after 2.5 years together. This was sorta the last straw for me. I sent her one last text (which many will say I shouldn't have) saying I know about her new guy, she lied to me, and that I will be forgetting about her now and goodbye. Phase.... you get the picture.

Here I am writing on the 3rd month since the breakup and it has certainly been NC for awhile now. I have no intention to ever contact her again. She really showed me how quick a warm heart can turn cold. I can't say my spirits are up, but I can say I am coping extremely better. I have entered this phase... who knows what is next

Another reason I write this today is because I know there are several posters on here that are struggling. Whether you have just come off a breakup or whether you have been keeping yourself strong for awhile now. I know from day one everyone on here says turn and run and never look back. It really is not that easy. I only now am able to realize that this is how it has to be. When you are placed in this situation and given the cold shoulder left to wallow in your sorrows, find yourself. Do what you think you need to do. At first I do not think you will find the answer and understand that, but eventually it will come to you.

I know it will be a long time from now but I know my ex will be contacting me someday.

Thanks ENA

I know it will be a long time from now but I know my ex will be contacting me someday.

And hopefully by that time (a long time from now) you will be in an awesome situation with a new awesome girl and you will be completely 100% indifferent toward her....much like she is to you right now. Maybe "gasp!" you will find it reasonable and logical to ignore her.

Actually, that's my wish for you. That maybe a year and a half goes by. You heal, find love again, and greatly improve your life in several ways. You've all but forgotten your ex completely. She very rarely enters your mind. It's a nice Saturday afternoon, you're shopping for groceries with your super cute and fun new girlfriend who is everything awesome that your ex wasn't and more... She is checking out some meats while you're in an isle close by perusing the potatoes... and you get a text from your ex "Hey!! How are you?!?! I've been thinking about you...."

Your heart starts beating quick and your forehead starts perspiring a bit... the moment you have been subconsciously waiting for for so long has now presented itself... At that same moment, you pick your head up and your girlfriend is trying to get your attention holding up two gigantic cuts of NY Strip steaks over her head as if to ask "choose your meat you sexy bastard! " she's smiling as if she can see straight through to your heart from the meat isle...

You look down at the text... SWIPE! annnnnd deleted..... Put the phone back in your pocket, breathe a gigantic sigh of relief as you confidently stroll (almost dance) up to your girl and lay the type of kiss on her that's only told in story books or shown in movies...while she still has a steak in each hand...smiling at each other... Unfortunately she has to pick new steaks now, because she sort of crushed the ones she had, squeezing too tightly when you kissed her. Because that's what you do to her...

That night you have an incredible meal cooked by you both...wine.. incredibly passionate sex (at least 5-6 times) before passing out snoring in each other's ears.

You never think about or hear from your ex again.

That is my wish for you....e4thwormjim.

Steak, passionate sex, sexy girlfriend. Is this 50 shades of gray for men? Sign me up!

Yea man we are all pretty much on the same journey I'm coming up to almost a month post breakup and NC is the best thing in the world I'm glad i applied it straight away and i haven't looked back since.

All the best!

Steak, passionate sex, sexy girlfriend. Is this 50 shades of gray for men? Sign me up!

 

All the best!

I like to write a lot. That was pretty fun to write too

Hahaha I love it!

Oh Chama... I love your texts, well the PG parts of them anyway.

You give hope to all those who need it.

*Edit*

haha... I meant to say posts.. not texts! Oh boy, people gonna start talking now! ;-)

The funniest part about that story is that my ex was a vegetarian. Haha

love your posts Chama thanks for the willingness to help everybody out and the dashes of humor definitely gives us all a smile

The funniest part about that story is that my ex was a vegetarian. Haha

Oh man....well she at least ate lamb right?!!!

Dude, I would maw a cows butt in the middle of a grass field. And the girl I call my sig other would be the first one there....mawing a cow butt

Lol jk.... it's Friday yo!! I had a few too many chocolate milks tonight. Annnnnnnd bed.