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I Don't Get It!!!

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I really don't know whats going on in my own head so I'm just going to toss this out there. Maybe someone has gone through the same thing.](*,)


I'm in an awesome relationship with a guy I absolutely adore. I've been having really stupid family issues for the last while so I've been staying with him.


I got into a fight one day with my mom and went on a rampage so to say. I was pissed off and angry at everything. For some reason I directed anger at him, I don't know why and through this random thought in my face that maybe I didn't love him. Which totally makes no sense what so ever.


Suddenly I started thinking about leaving him and actually believing this random thought. The weird thing is there is like this duality where I am my regular happy, go lucky self, who is completely in love with the guy and then there is this girl who has no hope and is practically emotionless.


What do I do? I feel like I know who I am but this thought totally just screwed me right up. I know it may not seem like a big deal. But it doesn't make sense why I should feel this way or have these thoughts! All I know is it feels like there is a war going on in my head and I feel like I'm going crazy!!!


Anyone ever go through this before?

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Haha, no worries. I was actually considering it because it makes zero sense to me. I also thought for a while that maybe I was Dissociative identity disorder but I don't know. I just wanted to know if it was normal to feel that kind of duality. It feels like I'm constantly butting heads with myself. But the bi polar one kind of sounds like it actually could be soo. I'm not sure though. I should get it checked out. Thanks for your advice.

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Haha. See I figured it was something like what too. Cause I didn't understand why it happened. I was seriously fine one moment and then a lose cannon the next.


I do admit though there is a lot of tension going on in my family right now. I just didn't get why I freaked out so bad or why this confusion set in in the first place. For a while I thought I was having doubts about our relationship but it just didn't add up.


I'm hoping it will go away. It kind of freaked me out when it happened cause it felt like there was someone else in my head. I hope your right though.


I figured I know myself well enough to get through it, but I was afraid I was kind of going insane.

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Haha nope Libra. The emotional, sappy one


Surprising he has been calm during the whole thing. I think he knew it was family things bothering me. He's has listened to me through all of this and has been extremely supportive. I feel so lucky that he is in my life. So thats why I was weirded out when the not loving him thing popped up because I know I absolutely adore him.


I'm usually pretty good at dealing with stress and I don't think I have ever snapped. I know I'm dealing with alot more than I usually do so I guess some freaking out was inevitable.


Do you think just dealing with this weird stress kind of created a dual way of looking at things and I became really negative because of it?

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I try never to run away from a problem because I know they usually get out of hand if they aren't looked after.


I think alot of what was happening in my family life was really out of my control so then I freaked because a big part of my life was just going haywire and there was absolutely nothing I could do to stop it.


Ahhh chaos.

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