Metaphorically and Literally "Eating Away At Me". Help!

[dudecar46]

Hello, I am 20 years of age, and for the longest time I had a major problem; I was excessively overweight and I absolutely hated my body image. People used to make fun of me and put me down, including my parents, and I never quite attained a great level of self-esteem as a result. Thus, about a year ago, I decided to go on a diet in order to reduce my 210 lb., 5' 10" frame.

 

Currently, I am in a downward spiral...I am 126 lbs. and unable to bring my weight under control. I am still eating, but I still find myself limiting my calories to 2000 per day; all it takes are the terrible memories of being fat and made fun of in order to motivate this. However, I am now WAY too skinny; people are now making fun of me because of it and, perhaps even worse, are worried about me...I truly feel like I cannot win!

 

I mean, I WANT to gain some weight back in order to improve my health, but how to I know that it will not cause an upward spiral and cause me to gain all of my weight back? I hate being made fun of for being too skinny, but I don't want to go back to how I was...any advice is appreciated.

[pacman]

This sounds like more than just a physical problem and you need some counseling to get it all straightened out. You may or may not have an eating disorder.

 

After you get your mental and emotional situation straightened out, then it would be good to get in the gym. A little bit of lifting and some protein and you will put on weight but it wont be all fat, youll be putting on muscle and getting the more masculine and normal appearance you want.

[dudecar46]

I actually take protein and lift...and it really did not do any good. And I simply do not have the time for counseling, as I am a busy man...I just need a way to convince myself that I can control my own destiny and maintain a healthy weight level.

[arwen]

Hey dudecar,

 

I think you don't have to be scared of putting it ALL back on if you keep a balanced healthy diet. I know how it feels though. I was anorexic for a long time, and also when I was healed I would usually just barely weigh the minimum for my height so to say. About 126 lbs at 6' ft. Now I weigh a bit more due to less exercise, antidepressants, etc. And I often feel that there is no stop to it.

 

I think it will help you to consult a nutritionist. HE/she can help you to design the diet that is healthy for a male of your size, age, lifestyle, etc. Please do so before this gets out of hand. You don't want an eating disorder, it's a long long road back. You can win, if you stop looking at this as something you need to 'win'. What is important is not how others consider your weight but how you feel about yourself. Being underweight you will risk depression, lack of energy, loss of weight, etc.

 

By gaining some by a HEALTHY diet (for a male your age around 2500 calories a day), you won't grow back those pounds you lost. You may experience, like me, a sort of jump of weight, and a stable period after that. Your own body is mostly stable at its healthy weight, gaining from there on is mostly because of excessive eating.

 

Arwen

[dudecar46]

Arwen, you really do make a lot of sense. I mean, I know that I am not out of hand yet, but I do not want to put myself in such a situation that would be dangerous...it really is inspiring to hear that a stable weight is attainable from someone who has been where I have been before, and I know that I can easily prevent myself from overeating. In fact, the way that I had initially lost my excess fat was by cutting soda and junk food out of my diet, replacing it with oatmeal, fruit, and vegetables.

 

I never starve myself nor do I ever purge, and I do not plan to do so in the future, but as I said, I always have a "hard calorie cap" that my mind prevents me from breaking on a daily basis. Perhaps if I moved the cap upward, then I could eat myself back to a healthy weight without becoming fat.

 

Thank you very much

[Locke2121]

Dude, SCREW what all those aholes say about you....are YOU comfortable at your present weight? I would advise going to a doctor, getting a baseline physical and discussing it with them. They will give you a fat to body mass ratio that you should strive for. Not because it looks good, but because its HEALTHY! Humans actually need a tad of padding on their bones.

 

And the next time someone says something about your weight, simply tell them..."Well at least I don't have your nose."

[dudecar46]

Dude, SCREW what all those aholes say about you....are YOU comfortable at your present weight? I would advise going to a doctor, getting a baseline physical and discussing it with them. They will give you a fat to body mass ratio that you should strive for. Not because it looks good, but because its HEALTHY! Humans actually need a tad of padding on their bones.

 

And the next time someone says something about your weight, simply tell them..."Well at least I don't have your nose."

 

You really do make a good point, and I must say that at this point, I have gained a great deal of emotional strength with a number of topics. However, I used to be very passive, and the fact that my weight has distinct roots within my childhood is inheed inhibitory.

 

Truthfully, I was comfortable with my weight at 140, but past that point, I felt that I was too skinny. I just want to put on the 15 lbs in order to make up the difference without ballooning back up to 170-180.

[Locke2121]

Then go to the doctor and get that baseline. Ask him or her if they know a good dietitian who can plan a stratagy of planned meals and exercise to give you the bulk you want. Tell them you want a gradual increase back to that comfortable 140 that you shot past, and that your worried about holding your weight at that 140-150 level. They can give you alot of help.

[dudecar46]

Then go to the doctor and get that baseline. Ask him or her if they know a good dietitian who can plan a stratagy of planned meals and exercise to give you the bulk you want. Tell them you want a gradual increase back to that comfortable 140 that you shot past, and that your worried about holding your weight at that 140-150 level. They can give you alot of help.

 

I just made an appointment with a local doctor for a physical over my Spring Break, and truthfully, I have wanted to do this for some time. My metabolism has definitely changed from a year ago, and I have no idea what my stabilization rate is at this point.

 

However, I am sure that someone more qualified can easily pinpoint this statistic for me. Thank you everyone for all of your help once again!

[arwen]

Ah I am so happy to read your last post. You will be just fine, stay healthy and proud of your accomplishment!

 

 

 

Arwen

[rocio]

Try eating the same kinds of things you're eating now, but a bit more of it. Don't reintroduce junk food of any sort into your diet. And keep up with the regular exercise. Perhaps you could replace some of your cardio with weight training.

[luxen]

I would consult a nutritionist. Like the others said, this could develop into an eating disorder. Luckily, for you, you are realizing that you may have a problem right now and that is always a good sign. I think it would be good for you to set a goal to be healthy and not to try to balance between "skinny" and "fat". Your health should be your goal here.

 

Also, those people were horrible to have made fun of you the way that they did. I was very skinny growing up, and I got made fun of for it. I can completely understand.