Girlfriend is loud and I'm quiet

[Iwantittoend]

She always says how she likes that I'm shy and thinks it's cute, but other times she'll be like "You're so quiet!" and I sometimes feel like I'm disappointing her because of it. I mean I can't help it, it's how I've always been. I love her and I don't want to lose her because of this. She's a great person and I'm always there for her, but I'm worried she might not like it like she says. I don't know.

[Dako]

You could tell her you know you're quiet, and her complaints bother you.

How would she feel if you kept commenting on her loudness?

[Jetta]

Is she saying this when she wants someone to talk to? You could work on developing more conversational skills. Comment about the show you're watching. Ask about her day, and respond to what she says. Perhaps it's more of you not seeming to show enough interest in her or what's happening around you. I can be too quiet myself so these are just guesses.

[Zaphod]

I had a bit of this problem with my ex - she was a bit quiet.

 

I think it's ok, but it started to grate on me a bit when she was quiet about important stuff.

 

You have a right to be quiet and shy, however you have a duty to communicate and be confident with your girlfriend and possibly others as best you possibly can. No man is an island.

 

Try coming out ya shell a bit if only when with her - you might find you get rewards - but nobody would expect it to be fair for you to change the essense of who you are, just maybe turn down the "shy" dial from a 10 to a 9?

[HyruleGuardian]

I'm kind of quiet too, but it doesn't hurt the relationship at all. She understands that's the person I am and doesn't want me to change for her.

 

I think you'll be fine as long as you don't completely close yourself off to her. Remember, she is your girlfriend. You're supposed to be able to tell her how you feel and how things are going. I used to have trouble with this, but I've gotten better.

[Cardinal]

I am introverted and quiet. The only problem I have come accross is when a partner wants you to switch hats on a dime. This is a good example of one of those times when it is best to accept someone for who they are.

 

When someone is shy, sometimes they change and develop over time. ime however, someone that is just quiet is different. It is part of who they are.

 

Quiet definitely doesn't imply an inability or ineptitude when it comes to communication.

 

Some people can talk all day and not say a word.

[Goblin]

Dude, i understand ur situation. She just wants you to communicate more with her and probably be as talkative or more talkative than her. Coz she would feel unbalanced when shes the only one who does the talking.

 

I am a very introverted person too but I talk as much as my extroverted gf. Believe me it would make her feel good but I feel damn terrible and confused. I cudnt blame her because she would talk more and more and it goes on and on....but when u keep quiet they will totally be silent and end of the road is near.

 

You gotta be with someone whos comfortable in ur silence at times. Why force urself to talk and change urself. If ure an introverted then so be it. it doesnt mean someone who talks less is less smarter. He just think deeper and more like a listener. It can drive you crazy when u start to talk so much when ure not used to it...

[Brooke657]

If your quiet to an extreme point maybe you should try putting your self out there. If your just shy maybe she needs to get over it and realize it's who you are. If it's really bothering you then maybe you should comment on her loudness like dako said. I can see how she would want you to be more outgoing but she can't force it. Maybe if you tried even just being more confident and outgoing just around her, not even around other people, she'd feel better about it. You have to communicate with her in conversations because she probably feels like she's talking to a wall, no offense to you or anything because I get where your both coming from.