My roomate is a guy and im falling for him

[Jordan]

So here is the deal. I moved in with a guy friend of mine, we went to college together and we work together. He is pretty amazing... or was. It was all great we had our own lives yet we loved to be aorund one another and just hang out. See he has this girlfriend though who started coming over and treated me pretty bad. So basically we got in a fight over it because he wouldnt do anything about it. Then one night he kissed me, it felt right and made me happy. We never talked about it and the next night he went by her... which really sucked. Then it happened again and when i said something about it he said it was fun for him. The thing is well I feel like we have fun with one another, I kind of until two days ago was seeing someone so I dont know if maybe my roommate was put off by that or if he really likes this other girl and i was just fun for him. He has been acting weird and not around a lot but the other night we went to dinner and it was the most fun I have had in a long time we laughed and talked and it was great then that night we watched a movie and we kissed again and as usual the next night he went over by her, she is mean and not very attractive and im honestly a girl that would take care of him and let him be himself and im a nice person and a cute girl i just dont get it

[MetallicAguy]

"she is mean and not very attractive"

What if he happens to like girls like that? And so what if she's not very attractive in your eyes, maybe he thinks she's attractive -- what's attractive to one person isn't to another.

 

If you think about it, he doesn't seem your type, he wants what's bad for him -- the *****y type of girl -- and you want what's bad for you, a guy that teases you, remains a challenge and doesn't care about you. See though, they're mix works together, maybe its just me but i think you don't fit in here and you should just let this guy go.

[Jordan]

If he likes her so much why does he cheat on her every chance he gets, and as far as her being unattractive a person with a cruel snotty personality in my eyes and many others makes for an unattractive person all around. and its a little hard to leave when you live with the person

[MetallicAguy]

He sounds to me like a loser guy that doesn't know what he wants and is just in it for the fun. I don't think he's ready for a relationship anytime soon...and for the roommate thing, i think its best just to not add any fuel to the fire by flirting with him or anything -- its best to just leave it as friends.

[TheRedQueen]

Three simple reasons why this is NOT a good guy to pursue romantically...

 

1. He's your roommate

 

2. He has a girlfriend

 

and,

 

3. He, as you said "cheats on her every second he gets", so is thereforeeee unfaithful.

[Ixtapa]

If he is a cheater you will win nothing by being together with him. Instead of him cheating on his girlfriend with you....chances are that you are the one he will start cheating on with someone else. He is obviously very immature about relationships

[notsomuch]

If he leaves his girlfriend for you, your always going to feel uncomfortable in the relationship.

Do what every sensible girl would do, spy on him when he's in the shower.

[Jordan]

i haven't been innocent in the whole thing until recently i was seeing someone else. its hard to know if im a game or if he has feelings for me, we are good friends he is always there for me, but then there is this. could he think that sinc ei was with someone else then why break up with his gf? im just confused and hurt i guess

[Rabican]

maybe you are missing the whole part where he is kissing you, and he has a girlfriend. Doh!

 

Ya hes Mr Perfect isnt he? So when he dumps his girl for you, and he goes to work, or the gym and you are sitting around wondering who hes kissing now... I promise Ill say I told you so because thats whats gonna happen.

 

Realize he isnt what you want him to be, and then just be his friend.

[Jordan]

no im not missing that whole part but thanks i came on here because it was confusing and not wasy to talk about with people i know because the whole i told you so men and women cant live together without there being a physical thing. i am confused and we were such good friends and so close that its hard for me to imagine he could use me so i guess im hurt and was looking for advice on how to handle the situation not mor ei told you so's im not a stupid girl i realize once a cheater alwaya cheater thing i just thought this man would never hurt me and he has im disappointed and hurt and i hate where i live so my situation is pretty sucky at this point

[ghost69]

i've been in this situation. not living together but hanging out with a female friend and hooking up. we hung out almost every weekend and went out with all of our friends all the time. when we hooked up, jealousy happened. it's rough. i hated to see her mingling with other guys and she hated me with other girls. but we weren't together. we had no say to one another about it. i liked hooking up with her and she always wanted me to stay over. this is why most gfs hate when their man has a girl always around. it is a threat whether he thinks she is attractive or not. i'd say stop hooking up with this guy. just be a roommate. you said he is a cheat. if you were together, he is still a cheater.

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