I injured my So's... tackle! Advice please.

[EvaGina]

So... my boyfriend and I managed to damage his "banjo string" the other night. He has had this a few times after one really bad incident a few years ago (a long time before I was back in the picture)

 

am I right in thinking he should go see the doctor? I figure that with a buildup of scar tissue, that little membrane would have become quite tight and these accidents will become more and more frequent. It puts him out of commission for a week or more!!!

 

Because of the pain of having a broken banjo string, he had to stop about 20 seconds into our sex session last night, I just laughed it off (we are both very happy, laughy people, we make jokes about EVERYTHING) but he went quiet, and then confessed that it made him feel inadequate, that he knew I wasnt trying to hurt his feelings and that I laughed becuase it wasnt a big deal... but that I had imasculated him.

 

(I was, after that, very loving and comforting, I had never intended to make him feel bad that he couldnt satisfy me that night... he's very insecure when it comes to such things)

 

So, two questions

1: should I encourage him to go see a doctor?

2: How should I react next time somthing like that happens? so I dont hurt his feelings.

[lostinwilderness]

yikes!

 

1) I am not sure what happened, and pretty sure I do not want to. However, without knowing, it is hard to give medical advice and I am not qualified anyway. Basically use your judgement.

 

2) Saddly we men are in general pretty sensitive on our sexual performance. Whatever the reason we feel a lot of pressure to meet unrealistic expectations and are easily offended by even benign comments.

 

I would approach this with him in a couple ways. First talk to him about what you really meant and how he would have preferred you to respond. He is best able to tell you what would let off the pressure next time something happens. Second find an alternate way to let him know that you still find him sexy (and manly). He needs to know that you do not think less of him, but rather are ready to resume when he is ready (don't put additional pressure on him).

[EvaGina]

 

its just alittle tear, I think the doctor is the best way

 

and I did tell him how highly I think of him. I also did tell him how turned on he makes me, but that if ~I~ was sore I would expect him to not try and have sex with me.

Hopefully he is ok now... Ill be seeing him in 10 minutes -eep-

[EvaGina]

Ok, so I just got back from lunch with him...

He said that he is really angry at the situation, that he feels frustrated that he cant do what he wants to me... and that he gets a bit shirty at me because he is attracted to me and he cant do anything about it

 

So I promised I would wear my crusty old trackpants as much as possible until he's better

[charley]

What's a banjo string?

[EvaGina]

 

ummmmmmm, the frenum (sp?)

the little piece of skin that joins the foreskin to the shaft

sorry, I figured "banjo string" was the common, slang name for it

[MacGyverRI]

ummmmmmm, the frenum (sp?)

the little piece of skin that joins the foreskin to the shaft

sorry, I figured "banjo string" was the common, slang name for it

 

OUCH!!! He needs to see a Dr. if it doesn't heal in a few days or sooner if it's always bleeding. The problem is that guys get erections while sleeping and it may take a long time to heal because of that.

 

Putting Bactricain (sp?), liquid band aid or other ointment? may help it heal faster.

[EvaGina]

It doesnt bleed... it just gets sore if he tries to do anything... he doesnt notice it when hes "soft"...

 

I asked him to go to the doctor and he said he looked it up and there is nothing to do for it but abstain...

 

dammit

[TiredMan]

Definitely see a doctor.

 

Some people are bothered by stuff. Imagine, let say you were having sex, and you pooped or something. You'd be pretty embarrassed I'd imagine. And if the person you are with starts laughing, all the apologizing in the world, won't take that feeling away. Funny side not, I knew a girl years back who actually had this happen to her. She pooped while having sex. I knew the guy as well. The running joke around everyone was that he (bad f word) the (bad s word) out of her heheh.

[EvaGina]

he told people she pooped during sex?

what a tool!!!! thats horrible!!

[TiredMan]

Yup but it was one of those drunk cancun things.

 

I thought it was funny heh. She didn't deny it either when it was brought up, I remember that.