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Old Events New Pain (Long but please respond)

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hi there, I just needed someone to understand and listen to my side of my breakup, and hopefully boost my spirits.


well the girl I still love, even though I try to forget or sometimes try to hate, broke up with me in april, I went NC and got her back in August. During that time I hada mini-rebound ( in detail I had this girl naked and could've went through with sex but I knew i was just picturing my ex so I stopped) My ex had a couple, she ended up fooling around,making out and giving oral sex to a 19year old co-worker as well as screwing some random during a out of town on business event.


We got back and this was said, the out of towner didnt really bother me, but the co worker did as I was talking to this guy regularly about my feelings for her. The other co-w0rkers would come up and say things like "so your ex is F'n Him now eh?"


And it just hurt like hell, but I managed to forgive her because my love was stronger than the hurt and jealousy. She moved away during our getting back together and it caused some rift and now she says she has to listen to her true "feelings" that she said there was no connection.


I'll have to add during aug-oct she sent me some of the most beautiful love letters I ever received from her, and I thought I had her heart and that she finally realized how much I meant to her. I guess not.


So were done again, she's said stuff that she never could see us working long term and all. And somehow at work after it being buried all since summer, this guy was quoted as saying he f'd her numerous times, so I confronted her now that were apart and she still denies sleeping with him. but the damage is done, without her loving back I feel hatred inside of me at times, I just wanna call her awful names for what she did to me. I was so good to her, I like to model myself after prince charming (heh) and I'm very loving and affectionate.


I sometimes want to make her feel the pain she's caused me, and I know what goes around comes around so that one day she will understand but I have no one left to talk to either. My true friend is her brother so I cant tell him the sexual stuff, my other friends arent in any kinds of relationships, and this co-worker as well as others were starting to be my friends, but I cant trust them, only my good friend and her brother were there for me, the rest were trying to get with her.


Her last email made it sound like she was completely honest with me, which she did tell me these things, but I still feel like I gotta put her in her place and tell her off that shes not innocent and she caused me alot of pain that one day she will understand...


not to mention I have this on my head at 4:10am and my police job interview for my career to take off so I can leave this small rumour mill of a town and start fresh, because I need it, i'm not sure what I'm going to do if I can start fresh somewhere else!




in much pain

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Hi there mike' ca sounds like you've had to go through a lot in the last few 6months or so but you sound like a strong person. You can walk away from this situation with your head held high, you tried your best but it takes two people to make a relationship work.


Its ok to feel angry after a relationship breaks down, infact its natural. Let your self feel these emotions it will help you to heal but eventually learn to let go. You may find it helps to 'put her in her place' and vent your feelings towards her - if you think that will help give you closure and move on then by all means do it. Personally I wouldnt because I woudnt want to give her the satisfaction of knowing how upset I was. This site is great for just venting how you feel maybe use this site instead. I have to say this relationship sounded vcery stressful and unhealthy to be in. Keep positive there is someone out there who will you will be happier with and will return your love back.

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