Kevin T Posted January 25, 2007 Share Posted January 25, 2007 Specifically, a first date, but dates in general can count, too. I need some ideas. Link to comment
Weeblie Posted January 25, 2007 Share Posted January 25, 2007 Not the movies. This is lame, but I've always enjoyed going to those bookstore/coffee places. Browse the magazines, have a drink, and eat some cake. It's cheap, easy, and plenty of talking time. Link to comment
Beec Posted January 25, 2007 Share Posted January 25, 2007 OK, divide yur dates into two general categories, and alternate first and second dates. The two categories should be talking and activities. Both can be invovled in some dates, but you'll figure out which is more a talk and which is more an activity. Any place you can talk can be a date, drinks, coffee, dinner, tea, lunch, brunch, a donut for breakfast, etc. I preferred coffee or dinner. But go with what you feel comfortable doing. Any activity can also work, a walk, a hike, golf, minigolf, a driving range, bowling, hiking or climbing, bike riding, shooting pool, etc. I think I've done all of the above on dates. Link to comment
Kevin T Posted January 25, 2007 Author Share Posted January 25, 2007 Be more specific. It's winter here and a lot of outdoors stuff is out. I need specifics! lol I have NO creativity or originality when it comes to this sort of thing! None. Link to comment
Hope75 Posted January 25, 2007 Share Posted January 25, 2007 What about bundling up for a walk somewhere pretty and then off to the coffee shop to warm up and talk? Link to comment
cantexplain Posted January 25, 2007 Share Posted January 25, 2007 Come up with two ideas for you to consider - something typical like the bookstore/coffee shop and something very different like putt-putt or chuckie cheeses or bowling. Hopefully you've got some knowledge about this person from previous conversations. Then balance the creative idea with the typical one, trust your gut and do that. My thinking is that the primary goal on a first date is to learn that the two of you can be casual and light and fun and the two of you can share smiles and deep laughter. This is then more about the two people, not the location of the date. I have had many dates in coffee shops where the two of us get into the talk so much it is like we are all alone. This is not about place, but connection, conversation skills, chemistry, etc. Hope these ideas help. Link to comment
applepie Posted January 25, 2007 Share Posted January 25, 2007 I have no problem with movie dates I think it's best to keep the first date casual, such as breakfast or brunch. Eating is a great bonding activity and it allows you to talk to one another. If that goes well, then move on to lunch or dinner. Movie dates are good once you know each other a bit better and you see a movie you actually want to see. I saw star wars on a date once and it totally killed the mood for me. I didn't see him again after that (maybe I'm shallow?). I never really liked outdoor activity dates but maybe that's just me. It's fine once you're in a relationship, but at the beginning it bores me. Link to comment
Hope75 Posted January 25, 2007 Share Posted January 25, 2007 The problem with movie dates as a first date is that you don't get a chance to talk to one another, but just sit in the dark and stare at a screen. the first date (and preferably the first few dates) would be better if you could do an activity that allowed conversation to flow, and you could get to know the person a little, before you silence yourselves at the movies. Link to comment
Dako Posted January 25, 2007 Share Posted January 25, 2007 Coffee shops, cooking dinner together, galleries and museums, A long drive to a rural restaurant with a fireplace, tour some architectural wonder, poetry slam, sushi bar, a friend's party. I agree that movies are about ignoring each other, or else why go? Link to comment
cantexplain Posted January 25, 2007 Share Posted January 25, 2007 Quote: "Movie dates are good once you know each other a bit better and you see a movie you actually want to see. I saw star wars on a date once and it totally killed the mood for me. I didn't see him again after that (maybe I'm shallow?)." haha - this makes me laugh. When Star Wars first came out (yes I am that old) my date and I arrived at the cinema parking lot early (in my big black fishbowl of a 53 Plymouth which stood out even then), parked in a distant and vacant corner of the lot - and proceeded to make-out almost about as intensely as you can imagine, we'll say. When we "came to our more regular senses" and it was time to go into the cinema, the parking lot was completely full - including all the spaces adjacent to ours. She and were together for 7 years after that. All I remember from that first viewing of Star Wars was a whole lot of stars and bursts of light, etc. btw this was more like a third date. and just a funny and sweet memory I would have forgotten without your star wars dating history. Anyways, the one initiating the first date should have been using previous opportunities to get a beat on what may be a good and different opportunity to get to know one another. Different, I think, is good. But a great time laughing and talking anywhere is different enough. Link to comment
Hope75 Posted January 25, 2007 Share Posted January 25, 2007 Sushi bar.... now you're talking! image removed Link to comment
hosswhispra Posted January 25, 2007 Share Posted January 25, 2007 Specifically, a first date, but dates in general can count, too. I need some ideas. I am replying to this without reading any of the responses you got: You know but I like action things...so here are my suggestions: aquarium museum walk in the park ice skating skiing snow tubing snow boarding Anything where I don't have to talk all the time Link to comment
heloladies21 Posted January 25, 2007 Share Posted January 25, 2007 Coffee shops, dinner, movie, dvd at your place, dance club, bar to see a band, art museum, music concert, shopping, ice skating, roller skating. Link to comment
Kevin T Posted January 25, 2007 Author Share Posted January 25, 2007 I get the impression you are an introvert, hoss. Link to comment
hosswhispra Posted January 25, 2007 Share Posted January 25, 2007 I get the impression you are an introvert, hoss. Yes Kevin T you guessed right I don't mind being by myself. I took a vacation to a spa a few months by myself (met loads of people, interestingly)....and I have lots of girlfriends who I love to go to dinner/shop with. But yeah, talking drains me and sometimes I get dizzy, dry lips, dry mouth, and a headache from it, too. I like to listen and interject only when I feel the urge too So when is your date? Link to comment
Kevin T Posted January 25, 2007 Author Share Posted January 25, 2007 I needed some ideas first, before I do anything. I'm in no rush, really. I felt it's important to know what you're doing before you call up the girl. As for me, I love to talk! lol I used to be really shy as a kid, but it's gone away as I got older. Hmmm. Link to comment
hosswhispra Posted January 25, 2007 Share Posted January 25, 2007 I needed some ideas first, before I do anything. I'm in no rush, really. I felt it's important to know what you're doing before you call up the girl. A man with a plan. Now that is attractive. I got a strong hunch, you're going to do well, Kevin T. Link to comment
cantexplain Posted January 25, 2007 Share Posted January 25, 2007 I get the impression you are an introvert, hoss. Introverts have the extra mental space to pay attention to quite a lot - they got it going on and we can't know - they're busy generating all that wonderful energy within. But introverts or extroverts can both get in an uncomfortable conversational situation - silent spaces, attraction, insecurity, whatever - there is much that can come out - especially for introverts with all that internalized energy. Introverts are most uncomfortable in a big talking situation. It drains them. I think of introverts as people who get their energy from within. Extroverts get their energy from others. Either can have dating skills or a lack thereof. Link to comment
Kevin T Posted January 25, 2007 Author Share Posted January 25, 2007 Extroverts get their energy from others. Either can have dating skills or a lack thereof. Don't I know it! lol But it's true, while I like a little time to myself, I draw most of my strength from being with others. I usually get depressed when I'm alone, and not around others. I guess I'm a people person. Link to comment
hosswhispra Posted January 25, 2007 Share Posted January 25, 2007 I think of introverts as people who get their energy from within. Extroverts get their energy from others. Either can have dating skills or a lack thereof. Yes I definitely get my energy from within. One of my best girlfriends is an extrovert and it kills her to be alone. She has to have plans with someone every weekend. Otherwise, (in her own words), she "wouldn't know what to do with herself..." And then there is me. I could be alone for a few days and not talk with anyone and I'd be fine. I wonder do introverts 'do better' with extroverts...and vice versa....all though come to think about it one person who I was really into was an introvert just like me so who knows? Link to comment
Kevin T Posted January 25, 2007 Author Share Posted January 25, 2007 They say that Intros are best paired with Extros, but I don't know how much I believe that. I think I could be happy with either. If I met someone who talked more than me, I'd just listen and let her talk. But if I met someone who talked little was mostly a listener, I'd be sure to keep the silence away. I guess I can do either, to some extent. Link to comment
hosswhispra Posted January 25, 2007 Share Posted January 25, 2007 They say that Intros are best paired with Extros, but I don't know how much I believe that. I think I could be happy with either. If I met someone who talked more than me, I'd just listen and let her talk. But if I met someone who talked little was mostly a listener, I'd be sure to keep the silence away. I guess I can do either, to some extent. Me too. I enjoy being in company and around others....and just listening, observing and adding only when I have the urge to do so. Just being in the company of someone who I like (eg. going for a drive with the music on--and not exchanging even one word) is enjoyable to me. Link to comment
Kevin T Posted January 25, 2007 Author Share Posted January 25, 2007 Not me. Silence is like bane in my coffee. I hate it. Anyone else got any more date ideas? Link to comment
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