do we date the same types?

[Caterina]

I've heard people say, "Oh, I like this type of guy," plenty of times and it always made me curious because it was difficult for me to find any patterns in the guys that have dated me. Theyve been very varied in all sorts of ways. Come to think of it though, I can think of a few:

 

- usually they were intellectually competent in some way

- they often were the pursuers...I definetly knew that they were the ones who liked me

- good sense of humor

 

 

It makes you think about things a little bit when you reflect on this. Its fun to speculate. I think that a large staple for me has been men who are very intelligent. I have the tendency to feel bored & trapped if I do not respect a man intellectually. Its also interesting to realize that I have only dated men I considered funny. I used to say that this doesn't matter to me. My father is a very funny man but I have always said that I have never liked men who were anything like him. I want someone who is psychologically deep, also. But, its also interesting to know that the guys I've dated have improved with practice. I had some really bad ones and they got better & better as time and experience progressed.

 

So I figured I'd throw the question out to you....

 

If looking objectively at your past relationships...do you see any patterns that crop up? Do you date the same man over and over or do you have some qualities that keep arising in every man you've dated?

[melrich]

Hopefully over the years experience with different partners fine tunes your attraction. I don't regret any of my past relationships because I learnt something from all of them and the type of person I was attracted to in my younger days is not the type of person I am attracted to now and I put that down to those learnings.

 

To me, if you keep dating the same type and those relationships keep failing or ending you are not learning, you are just sticking with type.

[AwdreeHpburn]

looking back at the types of guys I've dated - most all of them have very similar faces....they're all pretty varied personailty wise but pretty similar physically. Guess I do have a physical type.

 

The two longest relationhsips I've had - including my husband - the guys are really, really, eerily similar.....

 

...weird.

[Caterina]

Hopefully over the years experience with different partners fine tunes your attraction. I don't regret any of my past relationships because I learnt something from all of them and the type of person I was attracted to in my younger days is not the type of person I am attracted to now and I put that down to those learnings.

 

To me, if you keep dating the same type and those relationships keep failing or ending you are not learning, you are just sticking with type.

 

Good point, I certainly agree.

[Dako]

I'd say I was attracted to some real oddballs in my youth, and learned from my mistakes.

[Blue Skittles]

I can't really see a pattern in the guys I have dated. Although for awhile I was dating a lot of older men. like at least 10 years older than me. then I realized that wasn't the type of relationship i wanted so now I won't date older men at all.

[keenan]

smarts, humor, warmth, and 'down to earth-ed-ness' are fairly constant...but sensitivity, need for intimacy, charisma, and appearance are variable.

[Aurian]

I don't seem to have a physical "type" other than height, but I am attracted to intelligent, funny, geeky guys

[Momene]

I like curvy girls and, although I like some blondes, redheads, black and Asian girls, my favourite is the latin girl. Good job I married one!

[atarisrocks]

mine all seem to have either the name dan as a first name or john as a middle name

[jujubes]

All mine have their first name start with D, were born in September, have dark curly hair, are estranged from their mother, and are computer whizzes...it is very weird.

[keenan]

are they triplets?

[pinkelephant]

Physically speaking, I have a type. They tend to look like my dad.

As far as personality wise, if there's a loser within a 100 miles radius, I probably have dated/have/has a huge crush on him already.

[Caterina]

Physically speaking, I have a type. They tend to look like my dad.

As far as personality wise, if there's a loser within a 100 miles radius, I probably have dated/have/has a huge crush on him already.

 

ROFL. Its funny, one thing that seems to come up a lot is the idea that we are all truly only attracted to what is unavailable.