AngryHeart Posted February 10, 2008 Share Posted February 10, 2008 Day 4 Interesting...I went out on the town tonight with my friend. I saw 3 of mine and my ex's friends, whom I haven't seen since the split. All 3 [2 of them without me asking] told me he infact doesn't have a girlfriend, so he's been lying. One said he always goes in the pub miserable and on his own like before he met me. One of the guys, my ex said didn't want anything to do with me, and he was thrilled to see me! He welcomed me with open arms and took down my number. I do wonder why my ex is lying, and is apparently so miserbale when he chose not to be with me and seemed happy with me. But whatever...I need to try not to analyze it too much, it is what it is! He's a strange one. It just shocks me that you don't always know someone that well, despite thinking you know them inside out! And I guess him lying like this proves to me he's "not all that" But I sitll love and miss him! If he does have a girl friend or is seeing someone, I'm sure he'd have told them, and I doubt they are lying to protect me...they're pretty straight to the point. Link to comment
MNmike Posted February 10, 2008 Share Posted February 10, 2008 I thinks its day 43 Strangely today I was miserable all day. Nothing triggered it, I was just sad again. Its strange how the emotions sometimes come rushing back without warning. I just feel so disappointed in her. The hurtful things she last told me, the dating a guy immediately after. When I met her, she was the breath of fresh air that helped me realize there are good, sweet, kind people out there. I had just gotten out of a relationship where the girl broke up with me, said many very mean and hurtful things, instantly dated a guy, strung me along, and lied to me. She was NOTHING like the ex before her. She was a shining example of a beautiful person. However, she ended up doing the very same thing :sad: I just don't understand how she became the thing that I knew she was not? Link to comment
deleted-account Posted February 10, 2008 Share Posted February 10, 2008 I guess I'm just feeling real lonely lately. I don't want sex or anything like that, but i'm dying to just cuddle up with someone and fall asleep.... grrrrrrrrrr Link to comment
broken to Posted February 10, 2008 Share Posted February 10, 2008 Okay. I'm starting from day zero again. This time I'm going to do my best to not contact her. I know she is going to call tomorrow and the day after. But, I'm not going to answer the phone. I have written her a letter of my intentions so that she knows I'm not ignoring her. I want to heal and get back to my happy, old self. 6 months ago I was on top of the world. Recently, I hit rock bottom. I'm going to turn my life around. I am doing this for me. At the end of 30 days, I might contact her. Then again, I might wait until I'm back to myself 100%. Please say some prayers and assist me with good encouragement. Thanks. TO Link to comment
nikkers04 Posted February 10, 2008 Share Posted February 10, 2008 day 4 or 5 i'm trying not to count because we all know it has nothing to do with what day it is. THIS SERIOUSLY SUCKS! i went out last night had a good time then wake up wondering he wasn't with me why we werent' out having a good time like usual Link to comment
GetMeBack Posted February 10, 2008 Share Posted February 10, 2008 Well I am on day one again. I have posted a message on this forum so everyone can get a jist why I am back to square one again!. I am scared as hell now. I really hope I pull through.. Link to comment
broken to Posted February 10, 2008 Share Posted February 10, 2008 Day 1 over. Easier than I thought. However, I know it is going to get harder. But, I need to stay focus on the future and not the past. TO Link to comment
l_lollipop Posted February 10, 2008 Share Posted February 10, 2008 I've come to the conclusion, I can't do NC for more 2 days.... I try, but I fail so bad. I'm too deeply in love and miss him far too much. He told me today he doesn't want NC when I asked. It's just so tough!! Much respect for those who can do it. Link to comment
GetMeBack Posted February 10, 2008 Share Posted February 10, 2008 L-sparkle my partner said the same thing but they still dont want us no matter which way we look at it. I want someone to know they want me, thats the least I deserve. It feels really uncomfortable me standing up for myself like this but LC dont work for either getting him back or me moving on!. Waste of freaking a**** time!. lol. Link to comment
deleted-account Posted February 10, 2008 Share Posted February 10, 2008 I've come to the conclusion, I can't do NC for more 2 days.... I try, but I fail so bad. I'm too deeply in love and miss him far too much. He told me today he doesn't want NC when I asked. It's just so tough!! Much respect for those who can do it. I'd suggest starting with smaller goals. Set a goal for yourself to go 3 days NC and stick to it no matter how hard it is. It much easier to tell yourself to hold off for 1 more day. Every time you fail, set a goal to make it 1 day longer than you did before. Link to comment
deleted-account Posted February 10, 2008 Share Posted February 10, 2008 I love how whenever I have a few bad days, it's always followed by a really good day. I've been feeling great today. Link to comment
GetMeBack Posted February 10, 2008 Share Posted February 10, 2008 I think NC can only be a win win situation. I am trying not to beat myself up about the mistakes I made in my relationship, I was only human. My ex doesnt except any responsibility in his part of the break up whatsover. His exact words were " I havent done anything wrong, and you know I havent " Err..ok..lol. Well this in itself shows me he has much work left to be done! Tomorrow is Day 1 NC for me but I have a completely different mindset. I am doing it with the mindset he may never call me again but if thats the case he never was the right person for me! If he truly loved me he would be back.. I have accepted I did all I can, and have told him to not contact me unless he wants to be with me. I just dont think I could keep ignoring his calls he was starting to think I was playing a game and I dont do games at all! I have laid the cards on the table , he knows the grounds on which to contact me. He did p*** me off today, when he said " so you dont want to know how im doing " as if I was the one that dumped him??!!!. I am so glad to be finished with this head f*** sherade! Link to comment
GetMeBack Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 I would just like to add, "how to heal your broken heart" by susie and otto collins is also an interesting read. The chapters are short but the book covers just about every scenario we encounter when we are going through a break up with someone , down to how to " getting to sleep at night e.t.c" Link to comment
nikkers04 Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 ok so I"m raging right now so I dont mean to offend anyone I"M SO SICK of "coincidences" let me explain. I ride a motorcycle thats what i do to try to avoid all the heartache I feel. So i'm riding around for about 3 hours. I decide its time to go home so I leave the group and head home GUESS WHO HAPPENS TO BE INSERTED INTO THE Yeah my ex the one that broke my heart. One SECOND of different timing and I would have never seen him. ONE light being a different color me leaving ONE second sooner or later or HIM leaving one second sooner or later from wherever he came from and I WOULDN"T HAVE SEEN HIM! I would have been on a different street as he was turning onto the one I had just left. SERIOUSLY i've already hit rock bottom can't SOMEONE GIVE ME A BREAK! i was doing the best that I could and then he has to be painted into the picture WHY!!!!!!!!!!!! Link to comment
LilBear Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 Day 22! How MSN works these days just beats me. On Day 20 my sister noticed that my ex MSNed her saying "you there?" (lame). I've blocked and deleted him from mine, and I thought I did the same for hers too! (Could have been wrong) Then yesterday, Day 21, I was happily playing away on an online role playing game, on my sister's computer (her MSN was running...it always it) when suddenly an MSN window popped up and said " 'Your ex' wants to invite you to create a file sharing folder. Do you accept? Yes, no". Ah bugger. I was enjoying myself too. It just made my heart stand still. Link to comment
GetMeBack Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 Day 22! How MSN works these days just beats me. On Day 20 my sister noticed that my ex MSNed her saying "you there?" (lame). I've blocked and deleted him from mine, and I thought I did the same for hers too! (Could have been wrong) Then yesterday, Day 21, I was happily playing away on an online role playing game, on my sister's computer (her MSN was running...it always it) when suddenly an MSN window popped up and said " 'Your ex' wants to invite you to create a file sharing folder. Do you accept? Yes, no". Ah bugger. I was enjoying myself too. It just made my heart stand still. Eek lil bear what file did he want to share...mystery?? lol..It could be a letter to you saying he was an a** and wants you back...oh we can dream or not.. Link to comment
LilBear Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 Well my sister's MSN has been doing things like tht at random. Even with other contacts, because she just upgraded her computer recently and newly reinstalled MSN so I'm not too sure why it's behaving like this. Mine doesn't. Yeah..keep hoping haha. Link to comment
rjm0827 Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 Been hanging out and talking to my ex every few days lately. We are both getting along really well. Today especially. I really hoped we could do something tonight but she is hanging out with one of friends instead. Booo lol. Anyways, we are on great terms at the moment but I think I am going to go NC for a week or so. I know she enjoys being with me and knowing I'm there for her, but I think she needs a reminder what it's like not to have me at all. I think it will help her decide what it is she wants. Not sure if I should tell her that I want to break contact for a while or just disappear. I don't want her to think something bad by me disappearing, but at the same time if she told me she was doing something like this it wouldn't bother me b/c I know we would just talk again in a week. Advice? Soo Monday will be day 1. Going to need some support to get through this lol. (And I know a week isn't long but gotta start somewhere.) Link to comment
broken to Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 Crap!!! My ex contacted me today and we actually had a pleasant convo. Now, I have to start over with this whole daggone NC challenge. I can't help but answer the phone when she calls because I don't know whether it is emergent or not. I feel great about having the conversation that we had. But, I have let all of the people here at enotalone down. So, now I have to start over. Day Zero. TO Link to comment
GetMeBack Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 Well Day 1 of the strictest mother of all NC starts today. Last conversation went like this " Do not contact me unless you want to be with me.." Ex-....err ok .. I am scared s***less! He may never call Link to comment
AngryHeart Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 Well Day 1 of the strictest mother of all NC starts today. Last conversation went like this " Do not contact me unless you want to be with me.." Ex-....err ok .. I am scared s***less! He may never call So am I, huni. I'm scared my ex never will because he's sooo bloody stubborn! But whatever. If he doesn't it just proves he doesn't care about me enough to put away the sturrborness at least for a while, and that's just not good enough. Same with your ex...if he doesn't come back...he's not worth it. Sooo much easier said than done, I know. I keep wanting to email my ex "one last time" but I doubt it'll do any good. And the way I left it last time was good. I was cool, calm, collected. Eventhough he was really angry and said soem stupid s!hit. I looked the better person. But what you said was also good. It's straight to the point. I like it. One problem I am having...I did tell him I wouldn't have him back if he begged I'm now worried his stubborness won't let him even if he did want to, after I said that. What do you think?? Maybe I should contact again and this time tell him I do want him back?? But then that would look so planned out?? ARGH, HELP! lol Link to comment
AngryHeart Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 Day 5! Goal: Forever! Wish me luck! Previous record: Just short of 4 months in 2006. I am desperate to get over her and move on. This time I think I can do it. This time i think I can resist the urge to run back when and if she calls. This time I can be strong and not make the same mistakes I've been making for 2 3/4 years, thanks to you! This time I can wait for the right person, and have the self confidence and self love to know I can. Though I did have to put something in the mail to her, let's hope she doesn't call! I doubt it, although she dumped me 3 weeks ago, I ended things definitively with a "I don't want to deal with this anymore, don't ever contact me again" letter. Keep your fingers crossed. D on LI. Good luck!!! You can do it!!! Link to comment
Wotgorilla Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 Thanks! It's great to have friends out there like you.... Link to comment
GetMeBack Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 Thanks! It's great to have friends out there like you.... Yes good luck wotgorilla x Link to comment
GetMeBack Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 Thanks! It's great to have friends out there like you.... Those kitties in your avator are so cute I just want to kiss them!. Sorry offtopic! lol. Link to comment
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