What have you done in last five years?

[Twinkle Twinkle little sta]

About myself.

Good Points.I have grown mentally alot.Improved in studies alot. Best student of class.Confidence,self steem.

Bad points . Gained alot of weight .

How about you people?

[Fisch]

Well I am only 20 so I have done more life changing things than I can describe in the last 5 years. Thats a quarter of my life. Good points: Learned how to improve my social relationships tremendously in every situation, learned a lot about myself (but not as much as I would like), learned how to keep myself motivated, learned the difference between an active and passive lifestyle, decided to fly instead of sink after I got my heart broken, did away with certain unhealthy idealism, gained a lot of realistic aspirations, gained a lot of muscle lol.

Bad points: Still have some what i consider lazy habits, have a hard time focusing my energy as I tend to try and juggle many interests projects relationships etc.

I guess those are the things that I thought of first.

[No, useYOURname]

did away with certain unhealthy idealism,

 

can you elaborate on this?

 

 

 

 

For me - I graduated from college. Obtained extensive post college career training. Obtained professional licenses and opened and ran a small business. Worked in various avenues of my profession often at same time. Met the most beautiful girl in the world who turned out to be the devil with a nice butt and other great sexual attributes. Got up to benching 330 and onearm curling 65 pounders. Became a better, more successful, and more honest person than I ever thought I could be.

Bad things - see girl above, dedicated life to a future with her while neglecting to hold on to the other good things I had at the time. I've actually been super good for a few years now which makes it hard to believe life stinks as bad as it does. Here's one: Got down on myself and tried my darndest to find a way out.

[Paper Tiger]

Good finished getting my license to practice medicine, became a vegan, lost 70 pounds, gained a lot of muscle, and generally am a much better person.

 

Bad: I'm still weird and random (kinda bad for a doctor), My ex-girlfriend is suicidal and I feel like I can't move on until I'm sure she wont hurt herself.

[Hope75]

In the last 5 years,

 

good:

I have graduated nursing school summa cum laude while working two hospital jobs,

met a wonderful man and made a beautiful home with him,

turned 30,

made some of the best friends of my life in school

learned to accept and mostly love my body and mind for what they are.

 

bad: gained 20 lbs

[laboheme]

Good:

- graduated high school with a kick-butt GPA and got into a great school

- made the great decision to transfer schools after the "great" one turned out to be a joke

- had an amazing relationship with an amazing person

- found a part-time job that I know will help me in the future and that introduced me to great people

- found the willpower to get in shape

- became a lot more independent (in terms of money especially)

 

Bad

- drifted apart from a lot of people and didn't replace them

- messed up my relationship with the amazing guy

- became a little materialistic

[cecerose]

A lot, when I think about it.

 

- divorced my husband

- moved to Southern California where I knew no one, except my parents

- got a job

- reconciled with my parents

- bought a condo and adopted cat

- became a part time landlord (I have a roommate.)

- converted to Judaism

- began a relationship which ended after three years

- got a promotion at work (the increased pay was nice, too.)

- started swimming three times a week

- welcomed a new niece and nephew this year

- turned 40

[easyguy]

-Graduated from high school, working on college

-Have a part-time job

-Became a Buddhist, which transformed my life

-Opened up socially

-Have gradually become independent

-Lost a lot of weight, still losing more

-Shown more compassion to others, instead of just me me me

[Fisch]

can you elaborate on this?

This may steer us a bit off topic, but I seem to be doing that to a lot of threads lately. Obviously some people change a lot when they go through a rough emotional time. To sum it up, I used to think that the majority of people had the ability to put principles, honesty, and rationality first. Now I understand that people are animals and often they want to respond to certain stimulii and certain situations in a way that would be socially or culturally unacceptable because it is instinctive and/or it is to their own benefit (despite others). I realized that even if most people have the ability to be deep they are still susceptable to predictable patterns of behavior. I guess I trust people to do what is right over what is selfish a little less, and instead have been working on eliminating their need to be dishonest. I know that is a bit abstract or general, but it is probably the most useful explanation.

[Kyoshiro Ogari]

Bad points:

 

- Have not found that special one

- Have yet to settle in my career

- Have not conquered my migraines

- Have yet to sculpt my body to my desire

- Let at least 443 women go by without telling them I dig their vibe

 

Good points

- Hmmm. Um. I got a new pair of sneakers.

[Dako]

Went to a number of funerals.

Lost a marriage

Fell to pieces

Returned to motorcycling

Took charge of my elderly mother's affairs

Melted over someone

Got off depression meds

Bought a house

Lost a good job

[skyjuice]

Good point:

Travel overseas to study and finish my degree

Visited Paris and London and return home in one piece.

Met my first boy friend in London.

 

Bad point:

We separated after 1 and half years.

Gain some weight.

Found out my sister has serious depression.

[No, useYOURname]

I actually thought you might go in that direction. I know I idealized my ex when we got together. She totally let me do this and actually encouraged it by acting the part of what I wanted. All that amounted to was my brain and heart broke into multiple pieces when I found out she was and had been a lying, cheating, piece of trash. I lost my trust in the world and I lost my faith in everything else since she was the center of my universe. I now am aware of the red flags but it's too late. IN SHORT - Do not "idealize" a hollow demon with a hot body.

[Fisch]

Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I would definitely not say that I have lost my trust in the world. I just literally am less of an idealist when it comes to judging other people and having expectations of them. One way to put it is that I think that deep down people are not as similar as I once believed. Another person should never become the center of your reality, living in your own reality is one of the most important things you can do, and when you are ready making compromises with another persons reality and sharing your reality with them. But the compromise should never make you feel that you are powerless over your reality.