Confused!

[alcofrolic]

Bit of an update on a previous post. I'm really confused about how a guy feels about me. I'm 18 and he's 27. We both work in a school. On my day off (Friday) I go in to help him with some lessons and have done for a few months. Last Friday one class started asking if we were going out, obviously not a rumour we wanted going round the school even if it is untrue. Well, he's been flirting with me for quite a while but in quite a subtle, 'childish' way - for example he would poke me, or punch my leg (gently). On Thursday I devised a cunning, yet obvious plan to get his number. I wrote a note to him saying that if he wanted help on Friday to text me and then gave my number. He texted me later on that evening saying 'that was a cunning way of getting my number' so indeed my plan had worked perfectly. We continued texting and he was being quite flirty with comments such as 'you like being teased x' and 'i'm tucked up in my big bed'. So I was under the impression that he likes me. But today when I went in to help he talked about his ex from Uni that he's seeing tonight and said that she's the kinda person you can not see for ages and just pick up where they left off. Help? What should I do? I really do like him.

[DizzyDoris]

Dont mix business and pleasure, been there done that its not pretty if it all goes wrong as you still have to work together!

 

He's a lot older than you and the impression i get is he's just after one thing (sorry to say)

If he was really into you then he wouldnt be telling you that stuff about his ex,he wouldnt want to upset you and would be more sensitive.

It sounds as if he is attracted to you but just the impression i get from your post i think he's probably a bit of a player.

Thats just my opinion though, i could be totally wrong so trust your instincts, they never fail!

[alcofrolic]

Yeah, I see where you're coming from. Although we work together I only help with his classes in my own time so don't actually have to work with him.

 

He wasn't telling me about his ex but I was in the room when he was saying about it.

We get on well as friends and often spend time just talking or being in one anothers company so that makes me feel like he's not just after sex, but I could be wrong.

My instincts say 'yes' but then logic says 'no'. I just feel torn.

[Beec]

I think you don't react at all to what he says, but be a bit aloof over the next week. See how he reacts.

[alcofrolic]

Yeah. I don't really like playing games for fear of them going horribly wrong. We only have a week and a bit before we break up for xmas and wouldn't like to leave things too awkward! What reactions might I expect?

[Beec]

He either chases you for attention or not. His choice. It's not a big games, be subtle.

 

And we all play games. Don't kid yourself into thinking otherwise. The best players do it without being suspected of doing it.

[treefrogkate]

He either chases you for attention or not. His choice. It's not a big games, be subtle.

 

And we all play games. Don't kid yourself into thinking otherwise. The best players do it without being suspected of doing it.

 

I disagree. Unless being yourself is a game. I have never not answered the phone or called my boyfriend back to make him "chase" me more. I have never lied or stretched the truth, or been anything other than totally honest and upfront with him, and I've never tried to make him jealous or be aloof when I wanted to be affectionate.

 

Alcofrolic, if you feel comfortable asking, perhaps you could say something along the likes of "I happened to overhear you talking about an ex. Are you still involved?" and see where that gets you.

[alcofrolic]

Beec, I agree with you in that we all play games, it's part of what flirting is. But I also agree with treefrogkate in that we don't have to play intentionally. I don't pretend to be someone else and would want him to like me for me. But also I'm known for not being subtle! I love flirting but wouldn't ignore someone to get a reaction if it meant they felt bad (I'd do it if it was obvious I was only joking and wouldn't carry it on unnecessarily).

 

I don't know if I'd confront him about what he said, I'm too shy to ask something that direct.

[alcofrolic]

Woah!! Ok. Things have changed a bit. We've just been texting and things have got... well very flirty! Would it make things too awkward if I continued this much more?